jakeyin612.bsky.social - Profile | ThreadSky | a Reddit-style client for Bluesky

when your parents are being embarrassing in public and you have no option but to disassociate

submitted 3 days ago • 1 comment

This scrum of pot-bellied, sunken-chested betas trying to bully an all-black clad badass Eastern European wasteland survivor while dressed like Men’s Wearhouse mannequins is peak cinema.

submitted 3 days ago • 3410 comments

I am so stressed out! I need an Ativan and the warm embrace of a man with large pectoral muscles. OR A KITTYCAT!

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Officially signed up for gay kickball even though I have the athletic skills of a Victorian child

submitted 10 days ago • 0 comments

I replaced my debit card for the 800th time which means I will find the original in the next five minutes

submitted 12 days ago • 0 comments

WELCOME PISCES SEASON! DREAMSCAPES! FLOW STATES! DERAILING EVERY CONVERSATION AS A LOVE LANGUAGE! TMI AS AN EXTREME SPORT! WHAT IS TIME! TFW EVERYTHING! GHOSTING IF THE VIBES ARE OFF! LIFE IS SHORT AND RIDICULOUS! ECLIPSES ARE NIGH! COUP THE COUP! CALL YOUR REPS! BOYCOTTS! GENERAL STRIKES! HAVE FUN!

submitted 13 days ago • 7 comments

Another Friday night, another evening in which I have an existential crisis regarding my sexual attraction to Sam Star on RuPaul's Drag Race

submitted 17 days ago • 0 comments

Did my January photo dump and good grief, you can tell I was eating and drinking like a pirate and my hair stylist is dead

submitted 24 days ago • 0 comments

I'm so bored and depressed I just don't want to do a fucking thing anymore

submitted 26 days ago • 0 comments

I am such a Kinsey 5 for Sabrina Carpenter

submitted 29 days ago • 0 comments

I thought Chappell Roan was Cyndi Lauper on the red carpet BECAUSE I AM YOUNG AND HIP

submitted 29 days ago • 0 comments

Walking home from the polling place was a CHOICE but I've been complaining about weight gain for years and nothing gets you skinny like pneumonia

submitted 34 days ago • 0 comments

My car is likely totaled, I haven't done standup since August because I don't even think I've written a single joke, I decided to do dry February and I'm already nervous about it, and we have four more years of autocratic leadership, UFFDA

submitted 35 days ago • 0 comments

I'm so worried I screwed up royally at work and I officially lost my winter jacket like a drunken fool. Adulthood remains elusive.

submitted 36 days ago • 0 comments

Ew I am almost 40 and I LIKE A BOY with big sad eyes and a broad chest and I like the way I feel when he looks at me. No, you're weird

submitted 37 days ago • 0 comments

HELL FROZE OVER AND I FINALLY WON A GAME OF MARIO PARTY! AND YES IT IS BECAUSE I GOT A "MOST MISFORTUNATE" STAR! A WIN IS A WIN!

submitted 37 days ago • 0 comments

God keeps whispering to me to spend the $10 and take the extra ten minutes to Uber/Lyft when I travel Northeast instead of leaving my car overnight, and now God SHOUTED bc I got side swiped so bad that my car is broken and there was a freaking police report on the dash

submitted 38 days ago • 0 comments

My keys are at my brother's and I think my coat is at my friend's and I'm not sure where my car is and I am beginning to wonder why I am ever allowed to leave the house

submitted 38 days ago • 0 comments

THE TRAITORS is bringing out the horny urges of the editors (Sam showering as B roll!) and the maternal urges of the contestants (Bob Harper scolding Tom Sandoval for eating too much at breakfast)

submitted 38 days ago • 0 comments

These beer jock gays at Lush are so mean it's quite fascinating

submitted 43 days ago • 0 comments

My everything hurts but I am so lucky to be working

submitted 44 days ago • 0 comments

I have a road gig tomorrow and it's gonna be six degrees so I got gas THE NIGHT BEFORE!!! Please clap

submitted 45 days ago • 0 comments

Watching THE SUBSTANCE with my eyes open this time was a choice

submitted 47 days ago • 0 comments

Oh yeah my mom said "I took care of it" and I owe them $1200

submitted 48 days ago • 0 comments

Well this aged like milk

submitted 48 days ago • 0 comments

My new workout plan is getting lost in the skyway until I can afford a Barry's class

submitted 49 days ago • 0 comments

This is legit horrifying "we are living in a simulation" shit

submitted 49 days ago • 0 comments

Carrie Underwood's inauguration song had better be a medley with "Before He Cheats"

submitted 49 days ago • 7 comments

None of my friends want to watch the Vikings game with me, HOW DID I BECOME THE JOCK OF THE GROUP!!!? I am like 70% body fat

submitted 49 days ago • 0 comments

Going to a vegan, dairy free, gluten free, alcohol free potluck today because I live in Longfellow

submitted 52 days ago • 4 comments

I am going to journal more even if privately and not "blogging" because every day I realize my short term memory is getting worse and worse and it kind of scares the hell out of me. Happy Sunday

submitted 51 days ago • 0 comments

I am fucking up my own karma by watching game show fails at 4:18 AM when my only hope for financial solvency in 2025 is somehow winning a lot of money on a game show

submitted 51 days ago • 1 comment

Went on Facebook memories until I saw a post that said I was 115 pounds ten years ago so I am going to walk into the sea

submitted 52 days ago • 0 comments

If more of this cast knew that Nikki was an identical twin they'd be more suspicious of her #traitorsUS

submitted 53 days ago • 0 comments

God bless these gay editors for all the gratuitous shirtless shots of Dylan Efron! And it's LITERALLY for show bc the contestants actually stay in a hotel #TraitorsUS

submitted 53 days ago • 1 comment

The screenplay of THE SUBSTANCE refers to Fred as "a rather unprepossessing-looking man" and I have found my new bio for dating apps

submitted 55 days ago • 0 comments

This includes the gays!!!!

submitted 55 days ago • 1 comment