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jiminysnackmouth.online
a better poster than elon musk
713 posts 157 followers 225 following
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If Gen Z really wants to dunk on millennials, they should learn about Foursquare and go around saying stuff like, "I hear you're the mayor of this Panera Bread."

submitted 1 day ago • 102 comments

me getting out of jury duty half an hour ago

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH

submitted 2 days ago • 84 comments

at the ball game

submitted 8 days ago • 1 comment

the angels are just signing everyone who was good in 2019, it's the Remember Some Guys roster

submitted 12 days ago • 1 comment

submitted 13 days ago • 1 comment

good evening to the monroe blue line caprese sandwich rat

submitted 16 days ago • 0 comments

in march i tried to cut a frozen bagel with a bread knife, it slipped, i cut my finger on a shallow angle but kinda deep, and while i was trying to dress it i passed out, hit the tub surround with my face, and chipped a tooth

submitted 18 days ago • 0 comments

desperately trying to explain "if you can't build it by copy-pasting stack overflow posts together, then it's not the sort of code the computer can generate for you" along with "the hard part of the 3,000 line changes isn't writing them, it's verifying they're correct"

submitted 18 days ago • 7 comments

tonight's cocktail is a Jungle Bird: dark rum, Campari, lime, pineapple, simple. i'm trying to remain delicately perched on the edge of the tiki rabbit hole, if i go much further I'll need a rum-specific adjunct liquor cabinet

submitted 18 days ago • 0 comments

in case anyone thought my unhinged popeposting last week was an endorsement: fuck the Church, this man may have seen Urge Overkill at Lounge Ax but he will never see the kingdom of heaven as long as he has this hate in his heart

submitted 20 days ago • 1 comment

never been more proud to eat crow about a politician in my life tbh. that's my fuckin governor

submitted 20 days ago • 0 comments

For the occasion, here's some rare promos for the WNBA as it was debuting in 1997 that I captured from an old VHS tape.

submitted 22 days ago • 5 comments

last week i made my first batch of beer in almost exactly 2 years. today i took a sample after it was done fermenting and yeah i didn't really lose a step. english dark mild at about 3.3% (1.040 OG/1.015 FG for the sickos)

submitted 23 days ago • 1 comment

i agree that we need to bring back shame, but only for bad things obviously. i think the reframe is bringing back dignity. dignity includes recognizing when you've done wrong and owning it, which is shame, yes, but in service of improvement

submitted 23 days ago • 0 comments

at the ball game

submitted 23 days ago • 1 comment

last couple hours i've been under the impression that i must have misheard that one dead kennedys song and jello was singing "kill kill kill kill kill the boer" all along

submitted 24 days ago • 0 comments

man's legacy could have been the pitch clock

submitted 25 days ago • 0 comments