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jjonesy.bsky.social
Go to youtube.com/@cartooncircustv for all the funny shit
137 posts 948 followers 596 following
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Posts 43 Comments 7

You guys don't know my girlfriend. She goes to another social media site, in Canada.

submitted 1 day ago • 6 comments

HR: Linda said you “booped” her nose? Me: I was trying to mute her.

submitted 9 days ago • 5 comments

What doesn’t kill you makes you wish it had been stronger.

submitted 1 day ago • 10 comments

Repeatedly hitting the escape button yet remaining at work is why I have trust issues

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

You're funnier when I'm stoneded

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

I like funny nonsense to take my mind off all the deadly serious nonsense.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

I’m not the skeeter you want but I’m the skeeter you deserve.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Only apathy will save me now

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

Help I have too many books to read & not enough hours in the day. Don’t tell me about your champagne problems.

submitted 2 days ago • 1 comment

“Alexa, what is eighty six thousand four hundred times five?” -my 10 asking the important questions.

submitted 2 days ago • 2 comments

My kids friend just told me he thought I was 29 instead of 44 like I am so I’d like to declare today a national holiday.

submitted 2 days ago • 3 comments

rhyming cataclysm & astigmatism in this rap cuz my world view is clear but it's making everything else a blur

submitted 6 days ago • 14 comments

give me ambiguity or give me something else

submitted 5 days ago • 1 comment

ai is worthless to me unless it can induce coma

submitted 1 day ago • 2 comments

I’ll die on that hill of beans

submitted 1 day ago • 2 comments

I can’t think of anyone I’d rather drive off a cliff with than you.

submitted 2 days ago • 6 comments

Wish I could shoot ink out of my nipples, like a titty octopus.

submitted 2 days ago • 35 comments

Don’t look at me I don’t even know how I came to be part of this conversation

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

It was funny until you got offended. Then it became fucking hilarious

submitted 5 days ago • 3 comments

In last night’s #4nationsfinal, 100% of Canada was cheering for Canada. 50% of America was also cheering for Canada.

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Todays big news: Hooters goes tits up

submitted 3 days ago • 8 comments

Sorry I shitposted the bed.

submitted 3 days ago • 14 comments

My cat is sitting on the coffee table because she thinks I'm going to eat dinner while I watch TV, but the joke is on her, because I'm just rolling a joint.

submitted 3 days ago • 3 comments

Canada represents everything the United States will never be, and the United States represents everything Canada will never become.

submitted 3 days ago • 259 comments

Went to a speed dating event where I let jealousy get the better of me 35 times in a row. "WHO WAS THAT GUY YOU WERE JUST TALKING TO?"

submitted 3 days ago • 3 comments

I saw you tweet at someone else you slut.

submitted 3 days ago • 21 comments

Trump is literally starting World War 3

submitted 9 days ago • 1 comment

Roses are red Violets are blue Fart on my dick But try not to poo

submitted 10 days ago • 1 comment

“Don’t Kid Yourself” would be a great slogan for a condom manufacturer.

submitted 17 days ago • 10 comments

Wanderlust on your 20s, wandersloth in your 40s

submitted 19 days ago • 0 comments

Why did they call it a bayonet and not a knifle

submitted 19 days ago • 22 comments

Nobody lures you into a gingerbread house in the forest anymore.

submitted 17 days ago • 9 comments

Has somebody tried calling their parents to come get them?

submitted 17 days ago • 17 comments

You can lure me into anything with a Cyndi Lauper song

submitted 17 days ago • 7 comments

You mean that’s NOT Rod Stewart singing “Bette Davis Eyes”???

submitted 17 days ago • 1 comment

In case you’re wondering who I’m NOT voting for in the provincial election:

submitted 17 days ago • 1 comment

I have a certain je ne sais blah.

submitted 25 days ago • 5 comments

Don’t ever let anyone tell you you’re stupid. Show them yourself

submitted 25 days ago • 9 comments

Its funny when people assume im failing at being what they're trying to be, instead of realizing that I'm nailing being what I am

submitted 26 days ago • 2 comments

maybe if I stopped saying shit at dinner like, ‘let us eat lettuce’, on a first date, I might not get ghosted

submitted 25 days ago • 4 comments

You stay in your head and I’ll stay in mine.

submitted 25 days ago • 10 comments

going to start blow drying my hair while i’m still in the shower to save time

submitted 26 days ago • 35 comments

I love Danny DeVito

submitted 37 days ago • 3 comments