kimmalien.bsky.social - Profile | ThreadSky | a Reddit-style client for Bluesky

Post whatever you want, except Wordle scores

submitted 1 day ago • 13 comments

There’s a robin in my backyard totally squaring up to me. You wanna go you lil shit?

submitted 18 hours ago • 17 comments

Overeaters Non-anonymous: t’was I who overate and I’ll do it again

submitted 15 hours ago • 1 comment

It’s not a Good Friday until I get to crucify someone.

submitted 23 hours ago • 6 comments

issa spatial kimtamine

submitted 13 hours ago • 2 comments

Had too much caffeine and got into a brutal fight in public with a jammed zipper

submitted 22 hours ago • 1 comment

If Disney did a film about a pet rock, they’d still find a way to kill off one of the parents.

submitted 15 hours ago • 33 comments

The sea began to shiver…

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

We all love that famous cult classic, Lord of the Rings

submitted 14 hours ago • 8 comments

Reach the summit. Find the clit. Shatter the space-time continuum.

submitted 17 hours ago • 15 comments

Too many Johns in this world because of the bible

submitted 16 hours ago • 8 comments

I need an Easter miracle (to die for 3 days)

submitted 386 days ago • 2 comments

today we give thanks to Gabumon, who long ago digi-died for our digi-sins 🙏

submitted 385 days ago • 43 comments

the clouds are sending us messages but we’re too dumb to understand

submitted 23 hours ago • 4 comments

If everyone could keep it down, Jesus is trying to get in a tight 72 hours.

submitted 1 day ago • 4 comments

Your setup was longer than my attention span.

submitted 1 day ago • 6 comments

Happy good Gucci Friday

submitted 21 hours ago • 2 comments

got kicked out of the cheese party for saying “don’t mind if i fondue” every time i was offered something

submitted 1 day ago • 21 comments

everyone's working on pissing me off

submitted 21 hours ago • 0 comments

cocks out for the crucified lord

submitted 1 day ago • 6 comments

I’m taking a break from my mental health to focus on shitposting

submitted 23 hours ago • 5 comments

Sorry, people in metric countries. You can never collect a pound of flesh.

submitted 23 hours ago • 6 comments

Big if true: large.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

[when i spot another Asian woman in my very white city] 👁️ 👁️ 👄

submitted 1 day ago • 7 comments

I was really high and I thought Stephen Hawking was trying to talk to me from the afterlife but it was just my air fryer and microwave beeping at the same time

submitted 1 day ago • 5 comments

let’s make this the most sensual easter ever

submitted 1 day ago • 6 comments

Beating my coochie goon night

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

Baring my soul for attention because nobody wants to see my nudes

submitted 1 day ago • 5 comments

Biblically accurate Kimtamine

submitted 261 days ago • 4 comments

Ever get that not so funky fresh feeling?

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

i've had two naps since i got home from work today so i'll def sleep well tonight after so much practice

submitted 1 day ago • 4 comments

katy perry is the jimmy fallon of music

submitted 1 day ago • 344 comments

had to fire another electrician. it can’t be that hard to install an outlet in the shower

submitted 2 days ago • 28 comments

I look young enough to be carded at the liquor store, but I’m old enough to have back pain from standing in the checkout line.

submitted 1 day ago • 25 comments

you're in her dms, im coming to terms with my micropenis

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Post whatever you want, except Wordle scores

There’s a robin in my backyard totally squaring up to me. You wanna go you lil shit?

Overeaters Non-anonymous: t’was I who overate and I’ll do it again

It’s not a Good Friday until I get to crucify someone.

issa spatial kimtamine

Had too much caffeine and got into a brutal fight in public with a jammed zipper

If Disney did a film about a pet rock, they’d still find a way to kill off one of the parents.

The sea began to shiver…

We all love that famous cult classic, Lord of the Rings

Reach the summit. Find the clit. Shatter the space-time continuum.

Too many Johns in this world because of the bible

I need an Easter miracle (to die for 3 days)

today we give thanks to Gabumon, who long ago digi-died for our digi-sins 🙏

the clouds are sending us messages but we’re too dumb to understand

If everyone could keep it down, Jesus is trying to get in a tight 72 hours.

Your setup was longer than my attention span.

Happy good Gucci Friday

got kicked out of the cheese party for saying “don’t mind if i fondue” every time i was offered something

everyone's working on pissing me off

cocks out for the crucified lord

I’m taking a break from my mental health to focus on shitposting

Sorry, people in metric countries. You can never collect a pound of flesh.

Big if true: large.

[when i spot another Asian woman in my very white city] 👁️ 👁️ 👄

I was really high and I thought Stephen Hawking was trying to talk to me from the afterlife but it was just my air fryer and microwave beeping at the same time

let’s make this the most sensual easter ever

Beating my coochie goon night

Baring my soul for attention because nobody wants to see my nudes

Biblically accurate Kimtamine

Ever get that not so funky fresh feeling?

i've had two naps since i got home from work today so i'll def sleep well tonight after so much practice

katy perry is the jimmy fallon of music

had to fire another electrician. it can’t be that hard to install an outlet in the shower

I look young enough to be carded at the liquor store, but I’m old enough to have back pain from standing in the checkout line.

you're in her dms, im coming to terms with my micropenis

we don't talk enough about how the popularization of vibes massively crashed the aura marketplace

it just took me three tries to remember it isn't tomorrow yet

I ate a whole bowl of vanilla pudding before being told it was mayonnaise.

Hey (with the wholehearted intention of acquiring your social security number)

this is why mcdonald’s isn’t going anywhere