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kksloth.bsky.social
posting things of varying quality to get over my fear of publishing things on the internet
95 posts 27 followers 28 following
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Posts 29 Comments 21

my ears are burning. either someone is talking about me or my hair is on fire again

submitted 10 days ago • 1 comment

love when people walk into my work, look around, and then say "thanks. we'll be back" yeah, sureeee you will. yk im not a fool. my dad said the same thing. i've wisened up to this scam, bucko.

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

guy who wears fishnets bc his boyfriend is a bear

submitted 16 days ago • 0 comments

ok so i know that LMFAO (the duo that wrote party rock anthem) is actually actually an uncle and nephew. but i still don't know which one is the uncle and which one is the nephew.

submitted 25 days ago • 0 comments

why is ammo short for ammunition? where did that O come from? gonna name my kid Mo and it's gonna be short for Munitions.

submitted 27 days ago • 0 comments

how are people so good at doing makeup on themselves? the canvas isnt even in front of you. its like trying to draw a picture on the underside of a table

submitted 27 days ago • 0 comments

love bombing will never work on me bc i don't even take normal compliments

submitted 28 days ago • 0 comments

timothee chalamet is basically what happens if you take a guy and make him famous

submitted 28 days ago • 0 comments

freddy fazbear gives nonbinary energy

submitted 28 days ago • 0 comments

i love bringing a ton of coins to the bank to count them, but what am i supposed to bring them in?? the coin jar? a reusable bag? a massive piggy bank?? i fear the judgement of others more than the wrath of god

submitted 36 days ago • 0 comments

apparently some time in your late twenties the customer service voice just becomes your normal voice???? fuck that

submitted 38 days ago • 0 comments

just found a pigeon feather on the ground and then found the pigeon it belonged to and then gave it back to the pigeon. and yes, a whole magical cinderella type of transformation just happened with the pigeon. now the pigeon is a princess.

submitted 38 days ago • 0 comments

i get teased when i say the word "california" bc i use the red hot chili peppers pronunciation and now i can't stop

submitted 43 days ago • 0 comments

can't eat food while watching a horror movie. im afraid a jumpscare will make me bite my tongue. that would suck

submitted 43 days ago • 0 comments

so much pizza on bluesky

submitted 43 days ago • 0 comments

guy who holds a boom mic like a fishing pole

submitted 45 days ago • 0 comments

gotta love when there's something wrong with a car and the car reacts appropriately. when i started my car and all of the dashboard lights turned on and stayed on, it felt like i walked in on it naked and it screamed EEEP like omg you're so dramatic it's just a loose connection somewhere

submitted 49 days ago • 0 comments

im so good at this game

submitted 50 days ago • 0 comments

using the word "revolting" to mean disgusting feels like anti-revolutionary propaganda. we should use more dignified words such as "icky" and "yucky"

submitted 50 days ago • 0 comments

alright which one of you jabronies forgot to refill the ice cube tray

submitted 51 days ago • 0 comments

wtf did everyone eat pizza last night?

submitted 55 days ago • 0 comments

guys i know this is gonna be hard to believe, but i haven't watched galaxy quest starring tim allen AT ALL this year

submitted 55 days ago • 0 comments

bluesky rn: Life is a cruel experience, but only because it has to be. We tend to wish things went differently, but we must take the good with the bad. A war without loss is a lesson not learned. We here at Todd's Edible Buttplugs wish you a happy new year. Here's to the future.

submitted 56 days ago • 0 comments

ok but what they don't tell you about this whole "drinking water" thing is that it makes you gotta pee

submitted 56 days ago • 0 comments

yeah drugs are cool but have you ever had prosciutto

submitted 57 days ago • 0 comments

rocko never did anything to elmo. what the hell

submitted 61 days ago • 0 comments

all it took was one little freak to put a hole in a bagel, and from then on, everyone just assumed it was normal. don't believe the lies that big bagel tells you. that hole is meant for naughty stuff.

submitted 61 days ago • 1 comment

industry leading hair specialist: alright we need ideas for ways to get rid of hair. something more permanent than shaving or waxing. any ideas? intern: fucking shoot it with a laser

submitted 61 days ago • 0 comments

have u ever lost something and wondered where it went? me personally, i lost the previous two weeks. just fuckin vanished.

submitted 61 days ago • 0 comments