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krisrobocop.bsky.social
Looking/feeling California/Minnesota
174 posts 46 followers 66 following
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Posts 37 Comments 13

A pizza crunch is a wonderful thing.

submitted 5 days ago • 1 comment

Imagine if you were bonded to the Pope like Elliot was bonded to ET.

submitted 9 days ago • 0 comments

I am happy Dame Judy Dench is doing adverts in her old age. Chasing those Ducats. Wurk.

submitted 14 days ago • 0 comments

#NoContextValentines

submitted 19 days ago • 22 comments

#NoContextValentines

submitted 19 days ago • 21 comments

Refering to Slash as "the guy from the November Rain video".

submitted 24 days ago • 0 comments

Never scroll past @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social without reading the Alt Text

submitted 31 days ago • 5 comments

Don't know what they expect me to do. I can't control the wind.

submitted 42 days ago • 0 comments

Love to spend 4 hours bodging something instead of the 15 mins to do it right.

submitted 45 days ago • 0 comments

With the tik-tok thing. The law is Ban or divest. So for tik-tok to comply it needs to sell a chunk of its American operation. Which means one of Trump's cronies (Musk and/or Zuck) will buy a chunk. It's a win-win for them. Expand control of media, control the narrative.

submitted 46 days ago • 0 comments

Yer da bought jonnies aff Temu.

submitted 47 days ago • 0 comments

Million dollar idea: Slut Nuts. Like Truck Nuts but they go on your wife or girlfriend.

submitted 51 days ago • 0 comments

'appy 'ogmanay

submitted 65 days ago • 0 comments

I cooked Christmas dinner, and there was very little leftover leftover turkey and NO leftover stuffing. This is a disaster.

submitted 69 days ago • 0 comments

I heard there was a secret ooze that turned four reptiles into dudes, but you don’t really care for turtles do ya

submitted 73 days ago • 57 comments

The most uncomfortable truth is that Jared Leto is a good actor.

submitted 78 days ago • 0 comments

the murder of brian thompson is a wonderful reminder of what christmas is all about: cruel capitalist oligarchs being made to feel the weight of their sins while tormented with visions of how, unless they change their ways, their deaths will be mocked and celebrated by those they exploited in life

submitted 81 days ago • 8 comments

He's hiring a ship He's packing his cloak He's moving to England To follow some bloke Dracula is coming to town

submitted 82 days ago • 62 comments

I often wonder, how is Maureen 118 212 doing?

submitted 83 days ago • 0 comments

Well it's the 12th of December so it's time for The Yule Lads! The Sheep Clod has come down from the mountain to mess with the sheep! Unfortunately for him, his stiff, wood-like legs make it a difficult process. #YuleLads2024

submitted 83 days ago • 6 comments

Oh, oh, so all of a sudden it's illegal to hunt men for sport.

submitted 84 days ago • 0 comments

Using Spotify to create a Minority Report style early warning system. Getting anti-depresents through the door because I listened to the Joy Division discography in one day. Listen to 3 episodes of Joe Rogan: Jail.

submitted 85 days ago • 0 comments

Eyes wide shut is a Christmas movie.

submitted 88 days ago • 0 comments

Sorry for being Scottish on main but I had mince and tatties for my dinner and it was fucking magic.

submitted 93 days ago • 0 comments

“Tell me the truth, am I out of touch with the common man?” I ask. “Maybe a little,” says my butler. I scoff, but my mouth is so full of aged tawny port that I start coughing and almost choke. He pats me on the back a few times. “Don’t touch me without your gloves,” I wheeze.

submitted 586 days ago • 7 comments

Don't know if this is just a Scottish thing, but the greatest pet name that can be bestowed on a man by an acquaintance is "Shagger"

submitted 93 days ago • 1 comment

Christmas24 needs to take it down a notch or two. Let's do Christmas10 and we'll see how it goes.

submitted 96 days ago • 0 comments

I read Lord of the Flies a while ago and now, I couldn't even tell you which one of them ended up being Lord of the flies.

submitted 96 days ago • 0 comments

This thread is excellent.

submitted 99 days ago • 1 comment

I had a Google alert setup for The Mothman. But I stopped it because it kept triggering and bad things kept happening.

submitted 99 days ago • 0 comments

How the fuck are the Smiths like that and Morrissey is like that?

submitted 101 days ago • 0 comments

Nobody gets called a Poser anymore. If it came back into the kids vocabularies, it would decimate Instagram.

submitted 101 days ago • 0 comments

I placed an advertisement for my business on a parking cone. I put this on the head of the Duke of Wellington statues head. I become the most hated man in Glasgow. Children spit at me as I pass.

submitted 101 days ago • 0 comments

Desperate Dan was way ahead of his time. Cow Pie sounds great

submitted 102 days ago • 0 comments

Quote share your four favourite videogame soundtracks

submitted 106 days ago • 0 comments

Oh. Wow.

submitted 109 days ago • 104 comments

I am off this week. I got the kids to school, then went to the gym. I would make a fantastic Trophy Husband. This Himbo is going to have dinner on the table tonight.

submitted 107 days ago • 0 comments