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mattob34.bsky.social
274 posts 200 followers 245 following
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Posts 34 Comments 14

Shame that for a hundred years, master criminals have dreamed of robbing Fort Knox and now it will be pulled off by a couple of idiots.

submitted 1 day ago • 3 comments

RIP Bill Fay, a wonderful songwriter and a hero. youtu.be/mJfca3ImjKc?...

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Friday nights used to be Go to the Video Store Night and there was a whole strategy and timing to it and our entire society has broken down since we replaced it with Try to Figure Out What to Stream by Yourself While Also Scrolling on Your Phone y/n?

submitted 1 day ago • 18 comments

Listen you fuckers, you screwheads

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

when the edible kicks in as you were looking for your glasses

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

lotta ‘24 voters suddenly seem surprised that they voted for the Eat Shit and Die platform

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

the single most un-american and anti-constitutional statement ever uttered by an american president

submitted 8 days ago • 5662 comments

Thinking about moving to Canada, not for, well, obvious compelling reasons, but just for the national anthem, goddamn

submitted 8 days ago • 0 comments

Not sure which premature thing is more depressing, the demise of our democracy or the increase in targeted ads I’m seeing for walk-in baths

submitted 8 days ago • 0 comments

Abe Vigoda was so cute at his first communion

submitted 9 days ago • 1 comment

Can’t think of a better voice to represent the health of today’s America than that of RFK Jr

submitted 10 days ago • 0 comments

Man it’s really coming down! Raining pretty hard too!

submitted 10 days ago • 0 comments

oops just microbiomed in my blood brain barrier, gonna have to sneak out of work early

submitted 11 days ago • 0 comments

I tend not to make good food decisions when I’m stoned. Also, do the hunks of cold butter I’m dipping in salt and snacking on like it’s pretzels while I’m making dinner count toward my daily calorie intake?

submitted 11 days ago • 0 comments

Telemarketing for… ChemLawn

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

the current moment

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

at the halfway point of a stultifying Super Bowl, art.

submitted 14 days ago • 0 comments

Enough about violence, start the violence! #SuperBowl

submitted 14 days ago • 0 comments

Spot on from @chrismurphyct.bsky.social

submitted 18 days ago • 946 comments

if you're a democratic senator and you're still voting to confirm trump nominees despite him allowing elon musk to gleefully dismantle the government then your brain has fallen out of your ass.

submitted 19 days ago • 107 comments

So it goes.

submitted 18 days ago • 0 comments

The DEI caused the plane crash narrative is a distraction. The tariffs are a distraction. Whatever insane nonsense Trump spews that the media will chase like cats chasing a laser light is a distraction. The only story that counts right now is the wholesale hijacking of control of the US government.

submitted 20 days ago • 1039 comments

Schumer telling the girl behind the counter the exact prune danish he wants

submitted 20 days ago • 0 comments

This thing looks like Bruno Kirby, right? You see it?

submitted 20 days ago • 0 comments

probably not good that you can see the air in LA right now

submitted 21 days ago • 0 comments

*very Johnny Caspar voice* Ethics.

submitted 21 days ago • 0 comments

yeah, I don’t think we’re going to fix our hearts

submitted 30 days ago • 0 comments

the guest: “hey series,” my mother-in-law dictated to her phone, “what’s the worst disease in the world?” “it’s siri, mom,” my wife said, “not series.” “hey series,” my mother-in-law continued, “what’s the worst disease in the world?” we were eating dinner outside

submitted 21 days ago • 2 comments

“She says she doesn’t want to fuckin’ talk to you.”

submitted 602 days ago • 18 comments

And then, when the flaws in their logic were pointed out, the Nazis realized that they were being hypocrites and gave Poland back

submitted 24 days ago • 2 comments

I give the pupper an egg every morning but don’t worry I make her feel real guilty about it

submitted 24 days ago • 0 comments

Love how people today are obsessed with our five year micro-generations but also like "medieval peasants were the same thing for a thousand years.”

submitted 51 days ago • 9 comments

I stumbled across this movie on HBO late one night just at the scene indicated here, quickly turned it off so as not to haunt my sleep and every time I look at this I lol

submitted 25 days ago • 0 comments

They want you to think it’s IDIOCRACY so you don’t realize it’s about to be CHILDREN OF MEN

submitted 220 days ago • 1 comment