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svatyvodka.bsky.social
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From The Archives: God Angrily Clarifies 'Don't Kill' Rule theonion.com/god-ang...

submitted 1 day ago • 23 comments

Sometimes I’m just like everything is so dumb and stupid what is the point and then I see Big Bird in a Larry Bird jersey and it’s like wow the world is beautiful and worth fighting for

submitted 11 days ago • 52 comments

BREAKING NEWS:

submitted 13 days ago • 302 comments

Plan To Straighten Out Entire Life During Weeklong Vacation Yields Mixed Results theonion.com/plan-to...

submitted 25 days ago • 59 comments

submitted 33 days ago • 60 comments

submitted 41 days ago • 37 comments

Lord grant me, for just one day, the zero fuck level of a capybara in danger of becoming pelican brunch.

submitted 44 days ago • 70 comments

PhD Timeline xkcd.com/3081

submitted 50 days ago • 617 comments

Happy anniversary to the second greatest headline possible

submitted 44 days ago • 1 comment

I have waited my whole life, for this moment....

submitted 47 days ago • 736 comments

submitted 48 days ago • 37 comments

“Pretty much every day I roll out of bed, eat breakfast, head to the office, get beamed aboard the Kluforian mothership for medical analysis, and then go home—like, is this the rest of my life?” said Matthew Taylor theonion.com/man-fee...

submitted 108 days ago • 37 comments

Boss Thinks Female Employee Might Be Ready To Handle Job She’s Been Doing For Past 2 Years theonion.com/boss-th...

submitted 108 days ago • 45 comments

Exhausted Friends Slowly Realize They Were Playing Board Game Wrong Entire 6 Hours

submitted 113 days ago • 117 comments

Dear everyone who rolls up in my comments when I’m talking about something that is not The Current Chaos, berating me that There Are More Important Things to Be Thinking About, please, and I say this with love, fuck all the way off into the sun, I will do as I please, unfollow me if it bothers you.

submitted 123 days ago • 1208 comments