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toddnotmitchell.com
Comedy writer, musician, and game developer in STL. Laugh at me at Weekly Humorist, Slackjaw, Frazzled, End of the Bench Sports, Doctor Funny, and out in public if you want.
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Posts 28 Comments 22

Overheard at the construction site across the street: "DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO IN THE SHOWER MOTHERFUCKER!"

submitted 3 hours ago • 0 comments

I aspire to the confidence and self importance of any of the golf cart drivers in this subdivision who will just reply to a wave or a "hello" with a shitty look. I'm sorry, you're in the world's silliest vehicle, I didn't know this trip was strictly business. Good luck on your lap time.

submitted 23 hours ago • 1 comment

Do yourself a favor and look at Felt That: Boxing, if you haven't. codewriteplay.com/2025/06/09/f...

submitted 23 hours ago • 0 comments

I did want to write up something about men’s mental health awareness month. I’m not anybody, but I am someone with a few failed suicide attempts under my belt. So this is from me to you. To anyone that needs a moment to feel seen. You deserve to feel seen 👇 lianaruppert.medium.com/you-are-stil...

submitted 4 days ago • 10 comments

You mean the stair that lost its mind? I'm not even thinking about it. Believe me. If I wanted to climb stairs correctly...everybody knows it. Everybody knows I climb the stairs like nobody else has, ever before.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

The blog is back. God help me, the blog is back. codewriteplay.com/2025/06/08/n...

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

If I could go back and do one more episode of my old podcast I'd do a sign-off on video and the camera would turn and there would be a whole studio audience there and I'd tee off on them like, "NOT ONE TIME?! LIKE 500 EPISODES YOU DON'T MAKE A SOUND ONE TIME?!"

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

The idea that these would not be clickable buttons is fucking hilarious.

submitted 4 days ago • 1 comment

Wife: Hon can you send off the grocery orders after you add whatever you want? Me: Totally. Website: For security, please re-enter your CVV. Me:

submitted 4 days ago • 1 comment

I'm sorry we can't all close out this day of drama IRL together in the Midwestern fashion and stand in a group by our cars in a restaurant parking lot and laugh about everything for hours.

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

What a day I picked. What a day I picked, you guys...

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

We're finally seeing the fruits of Trump and Elon's multi-year conspiracy to have their feelings hurt on television.

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

Why does every man over 50 believe he gets special treatment at Best Buy?

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

Back on Twitter for work because this is hell. Same name. At least I won't be troubled by having any followers.

submitted 5 days ago • 1 comment

We passed a U-Haul truck on the road. I don't think it was the full 50-Proud-Boy cab but it might have been the 25.

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

The creators of every single phone have managed to talk themselves out of just having the phone shut the fuck up if you turn the volume all the way down.

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

Our Lomi countertop composter just ate its final shit. We used it regularly for about half the time we had it. There's no way it offset the impact of a microwave-sized appliance now going off to be with Jesus a few years later. I remember worrying "is this just white nonsense?" and yeah, probably.

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

Discovery Zone and Aladdin's Castle are great examples of businesses from the 90s that we all thought we had the only one. Both had 300+ locations. Now we've had the internet for 30 years and somehow we know less about everything.

submitted 6 days ago • 1 comment

Woke up a little bit late today did the NFTs save gaming?

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

I've had to ride across state lines stuffed into the back of one of these things and somehow that was still compelling.

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

I finally looked up what DualShock even means. Sounds fine.

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

Can I just tell you how hard Autonauts has grabbed me? Damn I'm having fun with this.

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

One nice thing is I've been blaming the pandemic for a weight problem I've had since 2005.

submitted 7 days ago • 1 comment

Me explaining our family's situation: Me: Yeah my wife started working remotely during the pandemic too, so we sold the house we built to move back here. Most people: Why? Me: Oh because the rest of our family lives here. Still a lot of people: So? I never know what to say to that.

submitted 7 days ago • 1 comment

Still really upset about the time I made this for a Zoom meeting and nobody understood what it was.

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

When you're always trying to force success in different parts of your life, it's usually the one you've taken your hands off of for a minute that starts to work out. A writing mentor told me a good farmer doesn't harass the ground. That lesson can change your life.

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

What is even his argument? That he was visibly tripping balls on Christ's love?

submitted 9 days ago • 0 comments

So I guess I have an ex who's always posting Taylor Swift lyrics to our mutual friends. My thought is, what would you even say to Taylor if you met her? "Your music really helped me get through treating a guy like shit while he paid my rent"?

submitted 10 days ago • 1 comment