Profile avatar
toilettruck.bsky.social
You're a Truck!
1,710 posts 30 followers 26 following
Prolific Poster
Conversation Starter

damn RIP michelle trachtenberg, my first celeb crush

The Frenulist

i learned the c word from blinky bill

dumbass usda inspector at work sent in his bullet points

I will never kill you

sucking on a Werther's Derivative

who is dan bajonna

arthur morgan winning a hand of cards

i fucking love when pipes burst

rockapella beat the shit out of me

slam a book shut on your penis

When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, "Look for the folks saying 'I'LL JACK U.' You will always find people who are jacking.”

Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet, eating her curds and whey:

They screwed this all up.

WELP

gf: honey please calm down...all the regents are in attendance me: oh so you agree with the jester? you think me a dandy? a peacock? a strutting fool of a bird?!? gf: i told you not to wear the Coat of Brilliance me (whispering harshly): i knew you hated my coat

on a canned corned beef kick

Olive Oyl with a bbl

*my* penis implant surgery was a HUGE success and i had them add a couple extra balls, too

i'm 40 :(

made some corned beef häsh

My salad is lights out

fuck multitools my mew edc is a mora chisel knife, a pair of knipex mini pliers, and a couple mini screwdrivers

@georgialux.bsky.social Waddy Ewedeweng

i wash my shitty clothes with deturdgent

i hope i can afford to put in a big garden bc i kinda cant afford not to

i wish i wasn't afraid of wires i would try to figure out why my power bills in my abandoned store are so high

aw damn this cheese taste like hairspray

my mom got me a garbage can for my birthday 👍

cant wait to round up the boys to harass the boers

i hate ads but i do thank the lord for the totinos coffin flop short

*frampton voice* 🎶i want youuuuu/ to suck my pee-nay🎶

my unspoken dream is learn piano and video editing and 3d modeling and make videos playing good country songs with weird greenscreen backgrounds i design

["i think you're just what i needed" voice] pinching a pig on the penis

RIP Biff Wiff

Yeah, I inject them with saline till they get mondo huge. Nobody likes it, no, but the upside is it could kill me.

just realised they call them "action fingers" because you hold the dolls with your fingers

I'll have a hotdog with extra sauce

kevin smith looks like shit

doris pringle-salahari-brule is eric wareheimer's grandma?!