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uhhhhhoksure.bsky.social
150 posts 430 followers 148 following
Prolific Poster
Posts 43 Comments 7

To the people who don’t like caramel What the fuck do you mean you don’t like butter and sugar?

submitted 23 hours ago • 0 comments

If you love me you would buy me things

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Can I interest you in a flight of sausages?

submitted 3 days ago • 21 comments

We've extended the life expectancy of humans, and based on the current political climate, have absolutely made the wrong choice

submitted 3 days ago • 3 comments

The ice that melts in my iced coffee is considered adequate water intake, right?

submitted 4 days ago • 1 comment

Gonna go lay face down on the highway for a bit, later y’all.

submitted 5 days ago • 14 comments

Stick with me, kid. You'll do a lot of questionable sex stuff and then regret ever knowing me. It'll be great.

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

Life’s going along just fine and then you find your mom’s old diary and you read about how Motley Crüe kicked her off their tour bus for being, “Too nasty,” and you just wanna sink to the bottom of the ocean.

submitted 5 days ago • 17 comments

Pussy from a girl who hums the Imperial March while you go down on her.

submitted 5 days ago • 10 comments

Do us old ladies post thirst traps over here or na?

submitted 5 days ago • 3 comments

Hey everyone I’m getting like 3-4 likes per post so y’all better watch your mouth when you talk to me

submitted 6 days ago • 2 comments

Maturing is realizing flats are better than drums

submitted 6 days ago • 2 comments

I’m a Selena Gomez stan

submitted 7 days ago • 1 comment

I’ve been a member of Costco since 2005💅

submitted 8 days ago • 0 comments

why must the prettiest people have the most upset tummies :(

submitted 10 days ago • 3 comments

If I post will you like it?

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

Kid crush go

submitted 21 days ago • 3 comments

The Chiefs can still be named Super Bowl champions if Mike Pence has the courage.

submitted 21 days ago • 452 comments

Dentist: have you been clenching your jaw lately? Me: have you been reading the news lately?

submitted 21 days ago • 25 comments

I'm watching the Super Bowl at Drake's house, and it is very uncomfortable right now

submitted 21 days ago • 28 comments

Emotionally, I am the corner of a fitted sheet that keeps popping up.

submitted 22 days ago • 22 comments

These I’m sexy and love coffee memes are ruining my vibe

submitted 22 days ago • 0 comments

Live, laugh, sigh, cry, die.

submitted 23 days ago • 3 comments

The last time I watched a Super Bowl was 2008. I was still living at home and the Giants were playing. So um I was forced.

submitted 22 days ago • 0 comments

Finally saw "Wicked" and it's basically the same exact movie as "The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift."

submitted 23 days ago • 44 comments

I like you. But not, LIKE AND REPOST, like you

submitted 23 days ago • 12 comments

*donates body to science* Science: this is no good

submitted 22 days ago • 13 comments

I’m sorry but who the fuck actually watched the Kardashians? How are they still on TV?

submitted 25 days ago • 3 comments

I need the person who decided Americans need to have cream cheese in their sushi roll to know I hate them

submitted 25 days ago • 1 comment

My personal interior design style? The Bear in the Big Blue House.

submitted 25 days ago • 1 comment

One thing that comforts me is that I will likely never have to boycott Ben & Jerry’s

submitted 29 days ago • 0 comments

Maybe my anxiety is working just fine because everything really is a threat

submitted 30 days ago • 2 comments

Nearly every M. Night Shyamalan movie has a pretty good premise, great acting, and an absolutely horrible last half

submitted 30 days ago • 3 comments

I’ve been on a steady diet of sugar, coffee, and cortisol.

submitted 29 days ago • 1 comment

Do you ever wake up and think damn wouldn’t it have been awesome if I was born and raised in Norway and not this 3rd world country in a Gucci belt?

submitted 33 days ago • 0 comments

for some reason my brain has decided it is irrationally angry the yearly calendar starts at some arbitrary point in the middle of winter and not the beginning of the growth season

submitted 35 days ago • 26 comments

"If all else" has failed.

submitted 35 days ago • 9 comments

Hey I don’t know who needs to hear this but don’t forget to take your antidepressants

submitted 35 days ago • 9 comments

Zach Morris is still so hot

submitted 40 days ago • 1 comment

On Monday we wear black

submitted 43 days ago • 8 comments

If you ever wondered what if felt like to live in Germany in 1933, now you know.

submitted 43 days ago • 87 comments

No, I will not be reading the Bible simply because TikTok was down, you dumb bitch.

submitted 43 days ago • 4 comments

Woke up to TikTok banned and I don’t know about you but I am feeling extra safe today

submitted 43 days ago • 0 comments