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enabled enabler laziest perfectionist assuming final form "He's not that popular. He has no friends." -Stan Lee ʲᵒʰⁿ ¹⁹⁶⁸ ʰᵉᐟᵗʰᵉʸ ᴾᴺᵂ ʸᵒᵘ ˢᵃʸ ᵗᵒᵒᵐᵉᵗᵃ
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You know . . . really we're all just here to witness each other's mental health deteriorate.

They may have all the power but they still seem grumpy as hell

It's pretty cool that Eater put together resources for restaurants about how to handle ICE raids

the enemy of my enemy is also my enemy. fuck those guys

Sorry I staked out your office lobby with my PRAISE THE ALMIGHTY OBELISK sign when you told me your company’s monolithic.

🎶No need to take me down 🧒🏻🎸 'Cause I'm going to All-Scary Feels 🍓 Nothing is real 🧒🏻🥁 And nothing to get hung about🧒🏻🎸 All-Scary Feels, forever 𝄞⨾𓍢ִ໋ 🇬🇧

Amazon is out of bullet proof vests. Thanks, Luigi.

me to me: you have to stop

UNO! and Yahtzee!, your honor

Absorbing all folly into my essence

Aw, man a complete dissociative fugue would feel so good right now

You may think you've procrastinated before but just wait.

Q: How many Hatchets make Molly Special? 83 :∀

When they go low, I'm already high.

lord, if I can only be one thing, let me besmirched

#FridayReads I'd switched to rereading SALEM'S LOT by Stephen King while I got over this recent medication change, but now I'm about 2/3 through and there are vampires everywhere and it's not exactly calming, get ready to sleep reading.

they’re about to do so many war crimes

this is where I'm at rn (the couch)

@runoldman.bsky.social Is an absolute gem who is funny and boosts other people. You should be following him!

people do such strange things for validation when you can simply cook in front of a dog

PRAXIS INTENSIFIES

Unfortunately you have to primary everyone, not just because they don't have what it takes to fight, but because they don't have what it takes to rebuild. Last thing you want is them to win by default and then tread water until the next Trump comes to power

dude, all of my moonlight is serious

bluesky made me gay, and honestly, i'm glad

riding a daily roller coaster like we can do it we can do it we can do it oh no wait brace here it comes despaiiiiiiirrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr fuck ok we can do it we can do it

turned my resume into an NFT. employer said "this is a picture of donkey kong holding a gun" i said "exactly." I start monday

It's like you are glowing ᵃⁿᵈ ᵗʰᵃᵗ'ˢ ᵇᵉᶜᵃᵘˢᵉ ʸᵒᵘ ᵃʳᵉ

🎶 'cuz nothing compares nothing compares to soup

pronouncing beans like beanᵀs

is that good

office dog :^)

they should make a blood that tastes good