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walkingjalopy.bsky.social
Just a big beautiful adonis sadsacking about
2,910 posts 1,145 followers 234 following
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Posts 26 Comments 24

the "dragon" figure appears in so many cultures because it embodies our most fundamental fear—a guy who's cooler than you in every possible way

submitted 12 hours ago • 1 comment

I consign thee to hell, vile whelp! -- possible new catch phrase

submitted 5 hours ago • 1 comment

if you own a boat you can marry people and there's nothing they can do about it

submitted 10 hours ago • 0 comments

30 million dollar smart bullet losing internet connectivity and returning to initial position

submitted 11 hours ago • 0 comments

new yorkers need to hurry up and finish this whole mayor thing so I can go back to thinking of "the mayor" as an abstract concept

submitted 19 hours ago • 2 comments

i'm still on the fence about theories, but apparently somebody did a study and found a ton of evidence for them

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

they make all the food in the grocery store and everyone who works in the grocery store lives in the grocery store .

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

confound archeologists

submitted 399 days ago • 3 comments

happy holiday

submitted 204 days ago • 5 comments

do i need to get a gambling addiction to have a loan shark break my legs

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

under the genius act if you lost more than $150k on nfts you are entitled to the "blood of seven orphans"

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

impulse scrying

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

a gray alien here is going door to door biting the elderly

submitted 3 days ago • 13 comments

the speed limit in parking lots should be 85mph

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

This War Will Destabilize The Entire Mideast Region And Set Off A Global Shockwave Of Anti-Americanism vs. No It Won’t

submitted 3 days ago • 72 comments

blow up the moon blow up the moon

submitted 4 days ago • 1 comment

I'm being cut to shreds and blown to pieces

submitted 4 days ago • 1 comment

If an animal escapes the zoo it should be legal to help it get on a train

submitted 5 days ago • 6 comments

bigfoot standing behind me arms crossed, sunglasses, toothpick in mouth

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

this life is slobs vs snobs and i have a message for snobs: chill out baby

submitted 5 days ago • 1 comment

skynet has sent back a terminator that can reiki heal and is trying to pull john connor into signing up for life coaching

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

For the absolute last time: I *never* said I thought E.T. dressed in the wig and the dress was sexy, I said *I could see why people would think that*

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

One of your employees has become trapped in space. You are monitoring his mind via an EEG implant. Instead of sending him good films to watch to wile away his hours trapped alone you send him the worst movie you can find. Why is that?

submitted 5 days ago • 19 comments

white people shouldn't be allowed to have birthdays

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

shoulda done a parade of big construction vehicles:—, dynamic shapes, moving parts, bright colors, excited guy describing what each one does even though no one asked

submitted 6 days ago • 1 comment

you may be the world's best fashion model slash forensic accountant but you committed felony jaywalking; however since it was to save orphans the governor has sentenced you to solve crimes with a mystical element

submitted 6 days ago • 1 comment