Men, do you need a pair of nail clippers that will defend you from the apocalypse??? - ThreadSky

kashana.bsky.social • 111 days ago

Men, do you need a pair of nail clippers that will defend you from the apocalypse???

Reposted from Fat Kid Deals

Nail Clippers for $6.49!

Use code; 5050250216

https://fkd.sale/?l=https://amzn.to/4gOSvqd

Comments

roadreclaimed.bsky.social•111 days ago

Looks like it comes with your Batmobile purchase.

julieswearword.bsky.social•111 days ago

fellas is it gay to trim your long yellow toenails

thefabulous0ne.bsky.social•111 days ago

Who designed this? 😆

It is truly terrifying.

ouisequitur.bsky.social•111 days ago

the cursive really softens it

djl.bsky.social•111 days ago

Is is supposed to look like an angry dragon?

djl.bsky.social•111 days ago

*it

mikeroyce.bsky.social•111 days ago

men’s toes ARE the apocalypse

kashana.bsky.social•111 days ago

If only we’d banned men’s flip flops before The Event.

dwaynefuhlhage.bsky.social•111 days ago

I went shopping for a license plate frame and they were all either 'manly men surviving the apocalypse' or 'how many plastic rhinestones will fit' and little in between

cathypaddock.bsky.social•111 days ago

I got mine from we rate dogs 🤷🏼‍♀️

dwaynefuhlhage.bsky.social•111 days ago

tell your dog i said hi

maryvarshini108.bsky.social•111 days ago

😂

nzorach.bsky.social•111 days ago

TACTICAL NAIL CLIPPERS

EXERCISE YOUR SECOND AMENDMENT RIGHTS

hotayhoof.fuckedup.farm•111 days ago

TMI warning.

As someone with dastardly thick toenails, actually kinda yeah. 😆

rootbeard.org•111 days ago

Real men use their teeth

beebirdmoth.bsky.social•111 days ago

Once again I find myself wishing Faces in Things had a BlueSky account

edwoodk.bsky.social•110 days ago

I’ve been searching for tactical nail clippers to go with my Industrial strength tweezers.

freedom2b.bsky.social•111 days ago

It isn't a multitool.
😭

benhammerhead.bsky.social•111 days ago

If I’m going to sell or pitch to the average American male … it’s gotta be something tits or something bad ass.

That part of the brain gets set like concrete at age 13

davelindsay.bsky.social•111 days ago

At 67, I’m pretty sure my toenails will survive the apocalypse

buggcghee.bsky.social•111 days ago

🫢 oh my! Soo manly!!

lydy.bsky.social•111 days ago

It...has eyes. Or at least, an eye, and it's glaring at me. I don't think I need that much judgment from a cosmetic tool!

outside.bsky.social•111 days ago

It's cool that you can actually see the screws where they attach the gundam costume to the normal nail clipper. Just bolting extra bits on to make the clipper heavier and more tactical.

raccoonrunning.bsky.social•111 days ago

I mean, $6.49 is some low priced insurance to know I'm defended in case of apocalypse

tabgirl.bsky.social•111 days ago

“Are your nails the thickness of average bamboo?”

kevinpatrick.bsky.social•111 days ago

The Cybertruck of nail clippers.

coganosity2.bsky.social•111 days ago

why are men?

flere-imsaho.circumstances.run•111 days ago

not buying them unless they have a seven inch blade, and could be used to kill, carve, and cook an ankylosaurus.

blitz-y.bsky.social•111 days ago

They don’t so much clip as it’s acid blood dissolves your nails

gingerlraine.bsky.social•111 days ago

For $6.49, I dunno, maybe.

spectralthrum.bsky.social•111 days ago

Those nail clippers screamed for someone to destroy the Autobots

rsgat.bsky.social•111 days ago

OK but are they tactical? Because I need my nail clippers to be tactical.

blank.org•111 days ago

Are they MILSPEC?? Because I assure you my toenails are!

kashana.bsky.social•111 days ago

Yes they are, it’s just like clipping your toenails with a humvee.

lindaholmes.bsky.social•111 days ago

For people with XTREME TOENAILS

ascablander.bsky.social•111 days ago

True Alpha toenails!

kashana.bsky.social•111 days ago

FERAL TOENAILS

nartistnioshii.bsky.social•111 days ago

Geez looks like it's made from kevlar, thus the appeal 🤦🏽‍♀️

christoptomus.bsky.social•111 days ago

Freedom toenails

dansaltzstein.bsky.social•111 days ago

30 TO 50 FERAL TOENAILS

freedom2b.bsky.social•111 days ago

Not even an affixed blade. Nary any can opener. Zero saw.

Fail.

rsgat.bsky.social•111 days ago

It's an elegant, purpose-specific instrument that won't fail you in the most demanding real-world conditions.

freedom2b.bsky.social•111 days ago

*titter*

rsgat.bsky.social•111 days ago

The question you have to ask yourself is, "Am I serious enough about precision nail-clipping to invest in a battle-ready grooming device that I can be proud to pass down to my first-born?"

freedom2b.bsky.social•111 days ago

Union-made?

miastodont.bsky.social•111 days ago

They will not alert a sniper with an unfortunate light bounce.

rsgat.bsky.social•111 days ago

[shaking head, wiping away a tear] The number of good men we've lost to nail clipper-involved battlefield security breaches... I... I can't even talk about it.

soundwave187.bsky.social•111 days ago

Dudes are gonna be throwing these damn things like they're bat-a-rangs.

rsbenedict.bsky.social•111 days ago

it's incredibly funny to me how hygiene products aimed at men always have to look like a Decepticon for some reason

turbineseaplane.bsky.social•111 days ago

It's often marketing to their maturity level

stanthemanchan.bsky.social•111 days ago

Military Tactical nail clipper
Military Tactical desk fan
Military Tactical nose hair trimmer
Military Tactical toothpicks
Military Tact

james-h-hart.bsky.social•111 days ago

The marketing to men shit has me rolling. Checked in with Fox the other night, and the ad for Particle skincare had me howling.

Oil of Olay, but at boot camp with old dudes. Pure gold.

dreadpiratezed.bsky.social•111 days ago

Not to detract from the joke, but: I found some diagonal flush wire cutters for electronics projects, and accidentally bought a 20-pack of them. Turns out they make great nail clippers too. (My toenails are _almost_ as hard as copper, but not _quite_.)

evinyard.bsky.social•111 days ago

Whatever gets them to cut their nails. Especially toenails. It's crazy how many people cruise around with little daggers on their feet. Let's skip the "Cardi B for Toes" show this summer please.

neiltypewriter.bsky.social•111 days ago

looks like it was designed by michael bay (not a compliment)

erikengberg.me•111 days ago

This is so embarrassing for us (men) 😫

markspatny.bsky.social•111 days ago

Genuinely surprised that the description doesn't have the words "tactical" or EDC to attract the prepper crowd.

rlheppner.bsky.social•111 days ago

They’re just designed to look tough and manly to make up for the fact that they’re made of plastic and actually flimsier than basic metal ones. Aren’t they?

minamarkh.am•111 days ago

why is it so aggressive? 😭

terraformer.bsky.social•111 days ago

Because it’s “manly” and “tough” or somesuch

daveshaps.bsky.social•111 days ago

Want to feel like you’re holding an assault rifle even when you’re clipping your toenails?

kashana.bsky.social•111 days ago

It has to intimidate other men in the area who also want to clip their nails.

joulesbyrne.bsky.social•111 days ago

I love a tool that can't wait to maim me if I make the slightest error. Keeps me on my toes. All nine of them.

l422y.com•111 days ago

no i already have a machete lol

sommerjam.bsky.social•111 days ago

Tactical Nail Clippers so I can Pedi the enemy

aolgrandpa.bsky.social•110 days ago

Finally the tactical nail clippers I need to prevent my clippings from going woke

lairddinnaken.bsky.social•111 days ago

Looks like a particularly dangerous jet ski, or maybe a stapler 😬

divadeb99.bsky.social•111 days ago

Who the hell uses these? The Predator?

visadiva.bsky.social•111 days ago

Didn't MacGyver answer this question in Season 1?

dystopos.bsky.social•111 days ago

So, they took regular steel nail clippers, replaced some of the steel with angry looking but brittle plastic, added extra packaging, and doubled the price?

nyjanelane.bsky.social•111 days ago

And normal nail clippers aren’t even particularly feminine looking?? It’s not like they usually come in pink or covered in rhinestones, they’re steel ffs

mquerns.bsky.social•111 days ago

It never occurred to me to bedazzled my husband's nail clippers, but the idea is now in my head.

elrubino.bsky.social•111 days ago

But these are *tactical*. They probably have ammo pouches.

jbonomi.dev•111 days ago

Never thought about it, but now that you ask it does seem like a good idea.

elkaneo.bsky.social•111 days ago

tbh I didn’t know i needed it until just now

jennyjennijen.bsky.social•111 days ago

Oh no please don't make me picture the feet of the man that needs this caliber of clipper

jcc333.bsky.social•111 days ago

I might need nail clippers that look like a Halo plasma rifle, and these are 25% there. Just need better color ways

respectthefungi.bsky.social•111 days ago

I never before saw a nail clipper that looked this weaponized🤣
It is hillarious.

potzer.xyz•111 days ago

why does it look like a jet ski ?

driftingthrough.bsky.social•111 days ago

When your masculinity is so fragile, shiny chrome toenail clippers could be the last straw?

suzythealpacagoth.bsky.social•111 days ago

Guarantee I'd break those in one use. IDGAF who they're marketed to.

crystaldl.bsky.social•111 days ago

It also comes with a soundtrack when you open them

"....his toenails are a baaaad mother f..."

albjam.bsky.social•111 days ago

If you get pulled over and this is in your car..... they callin for back up

albjam.bsky.social•111 days ago

😂

ripplepig.bsky.social•111 days ago

If you're not taking your nail clippers or of the flimsiest blister card, the local drug store has to offer while also getting an assortment of nail files. What are you doing?

Men, it's not gay to go into the nail aisle at CVS.

jamiroqueer.bsky.social•111 days ago

I think it’s pretty obvious that I do

brentwaggoner.bsky.social•111 days ago

Clipping your nails is making you MORE vulnerable, you fool!

jamiroqueer.bsky.social•111 days ago

Think outside the bun, bro, I’ll be using these to fail to open a can

bryon29.bsky.social•111 days ago

aptofballoons.bsky.social•110 days ago

Cause why does it look like a transformer

bigstape.bsky.social•111 days ago

I prefer having all of my fingers and toes

thag-simmons.bsky.social•111 days ago

Every dude who buys unnecessarily "tactical" gear:

thompsonize.bsky.social•111 days ago

Megatron got a part time job.

are0h.bsky.social•111 days ago

LOL, this seems… excessive

rmoonhill.bsky.social•111 days ago

Am I clipping nails or fighting a Kaiju at the pacific rift?

Maybe... both?

hayao.lol•111 days ago

nail clippers that do a tactical roll out of your pocket

jeremymower.bsky.social•111 days ago

notowen.bsky.social•111 days ago

These are the personal grooming accessory of a WARRIOR

the-barely-jew.bsky.social•111 days ago

Set to cuti-kill

skeptictank.bsky.social•111 days ago

Thank gos for these masculine nail clippers- I was stuck in the stuck in the paradoxical cycle of not wanting to cut my nails bc all clippers are too feminine, but then having long nails like a lady