Anyone who comments on this with a Mitch McConnell reference: don’t ruin turtle content by bringing that guy into it The joke has been done and turtles deserve better - ThreadSky

pftompkins.bsky.social • 203 days ago

Anyone who comments on this with a Mitch McConnell reference: don’t ruin turtle content by bringing that guy into it

The joke has been done and turtles deserve better

Reposted from Paul F. Tompkins

HAPPY BIRTHDAY (Observed) TO MY MAN JONATHAN THE TORTOISE BELIEVED TO BE 192 TODAY #ANTSAT

Comments

popsmcdaddy.bsky.social•203 days ago

Cowabunga???

padrock.bsky.social•203 days ago

Regardless, if anyone deserves the honorable mantle of a turtle it’s Fred Gwynne

iyqbd.bsky.social•203 days ago

Are Wonder Pets mentions legal?

kickpuncher.bsky.social•203 days ago

Thanks to Burnt & Joan, my top McConnell joke association is now milkshakes rather than turtles.

garik-loran.bsky.social•203 days ago

Jonathan the Tortoise's Milkshake Madness

linconroy.bsky.social•203 days ago

Jonathan looks like he has zero fucks to give. Happy Birthday Jonathan 🎂

catsofyore.bsky.social•203 days ago

I didn't post Chester for years because of the McConnell "jokes". It has been safe here on bluesky for a while but I'm afraid the low hanging fruit reply guys might be arriving from twitter now.

rudetuesday.bsky.social•203 days ago

Chester's adorable 😍

abyssgazer.bsky.social•203 days ago

He’s so cute!

catsofyore.bsky.social•203 days ago

Thank you!

alladinpayne.bsky.social•203 days ago

So what if I did? You could take it on the chin...unlike some.

headoverhills.bsky.social•203 days ago

what about a Dana Carvey reference though

dbanwell.bsky.social•203 days ago

Only if they're turtly enough for the Turtle Club.

punpact.bsky.social•203 days ago

Ditch the Mitch and switch to Michelangelo.

And pretend it rhymes.

sethyisgreat.bsky.social•203 days ago

Are Matthew McConaughey jokes allowed?

sethyisgreat.bsky.social•203 days ago

Time…turtles live a long time…time is a flat circle…I got nothing.

pftompkins.bsky.social•203 days ago

Better be good

untrepid.com•203 days ago

Needs more milkshake madness

here2chortle.bsky.social•203 days ago

#notallturtles

thatkaseyjames.bsky.social•203 days ago

Turtle and tortoise content is best content. It doesn't need to be sullied

ravenholm337.bsky.social•203 days ago

Lich McConnell needs to be banished back to the infernal abyss from whence he came.

yotemcyoteface.bsky.social•203 days ago

So you seem to be implying hes not turtley enough for the turtle club?

Addendum 1: because that would be correct
Addendum 2: all apologies to Dana Carvey and the fine folks who made Master of Disguise for such an association

dreedful.bsky.social•203 days ago

They will all outlive him. He means nothing to their kind.

therandomlad.bsky.social•202 days ago

Oh damn its the Ninja Turtles

j0nsmith.bsky.social•202 days ago

my name is Jonathan and people have told me I look like a snapping turtle u have triggered me how dare u

justeric.bsky.social•203 days ago

Today I learned the word "yawp" hbd Mr. The Tortoise.

mercifulvoodoo.bsky.social•203 days ago

THANK YOU! People need to stop putting those bad vibes on the turtle community.

wehavesnacks.bsky.social•203 days ago

I didn't notice the Alt tags the first time around. Those are some Quality Descriptions. 👍🏼

rishiland.bsky.social•203 days ago

Poor old man's been yelling at generations of family's to get off his lawn but still...

firstsaskpirate.bsky.social•203 days ago

You better not Mitchion that again.

freeloosedirt.bsky.social•203 days ago

I mean, c’mon

sabbath-schrader.bsky.social•203 days ago

That last picture is BEGGING to be a meme. Add a word bubble to it and let the masses have their say.

roberttheshaw.bsky.social•203 days ago

They deserve Dana Carvey

pftompkins.bsky.social•203 days ago

False

roberttheshaw.bsky.social•203 days ago

Is he not turtley enough for you?

tobywallwork.bsky.social•203 days ago

💯 agree.

professordrdro.bsky.social•203 days ago

I knew in my soul that you'd be the one to deliver some quality turtle content.

samvuchenich.bsky.social•203 days ago

Thank you; and for your beautiful use of alt-text.

lecarpetron.bsky.social•203 days ago

Don't tell me how I can and can't have fun.

pftompkins.bsky.social•203 days ago

Too late

lecarpetron.bsky.social•203 days ago

In all seriousness as I apparently have your attention: You Should Have Told Me should be listed among the best stand up specials of all time and is my go-to example for what a funny joke from the perspective of an atheist can be.

pftompkins.bsky.social•203 days ago

Love you

twatsopholes.bsky.social•203 days ago

Bsky in action, you two 🥰

I needed to see this today.

daintist.bsky.social•203 days ago

Hear hear! Here's to more Master of Disguise refs instead!

robschamberger.bsky.social•203 days ago

Can I instead make a joke about it holding hands in a prayer circle on September 11?

kdiddy.bsky.social•203 days ago

Wait…that’s not a pic of him? It’s actually a turtle?

jkpierce.bsky.social•203 days ago

Also not sure who it serves. He is a terrible person because of the actions he chooses, not the body he didn't.

deaconacc.bsky.social•202 days ago

tonymanzullo.bsky.social•203 days ago

alli-thee-scallion.bsky.social•203 days ago

Eh. Do you mention that because you like it? I just always thought it was lame, and Dana Carvey has work that is of higher quality and actually entertains me. If you're a fan, that's cool. I wasn't sure there was an audience for that schtick.

tonymanzullo.bsky.social•203 days ago

So I saw it in theaters, that is probably the nicest thing I can say about it. The funniest thing about the movie was reading the story about Dana Carvey having a moment of silence and praying dressed in this costume on 9/11.

alli-thee-scallion.bsky.social•203 days ago

Thank you for explaining. That would be odd recognizing 9/11 in a ridiculous costume. Like 😜 & 🙏

nathandiffee.bsky.social•203 days ago

ANTSA192YOT

rogerjacucci.bsky.social•203 days ago

Exactly 157 years and 240 days before Technotronic released Belgian techno anthem "Pump up the Jam."

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5MHj3OKC594pU87Wj5H5Fn?si=Bfy35R-ZQ9q1txZb1fbnoA&pi=vI5G0OJXSO2a7

thelordcrispy.bsky.social•202 days ago

100%

vimesofthewatch.bsky.social•203 days ago

As a resident of Kemtucky who has voted against McConnell every opportunity I've gotten, I agree. There is no need to sully the name of this tortoise or tortoises in general like that.

vimesofthewatch.bsky.social•203 days ago

In fact, people should probably leave that piece of shit McConnell out of all discussions of Chelonians of all types.

Except for Gamera in his first film. He was nearly as destructive as McConnell there.