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a.falk.wtf
honorary witch | he/him | one jigger of gin per pound of body weight
1,985 posts 493 followers 547 following
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Posts 28 Comments 21

My cell phone provider just emailed me to open a savings account? What a stupid world we live in

submitted 11 minutes ago • 1 comment

This face really wants to make me donate to you...

submitted 7 hours ago • 0 comments

Would vandalizing this get you a visit from the secret service?

submitted 7 hours ago • 0 comments

Thanks distant cousin on facebook for sending me a chain message for cousins day. You really made an impact

submitted 7 hours ago • 0 comments

Jealous of the birds today. They're not walking into work

submitted 9 hours ago • 0 comments

While I was holding a solo exhibition, I was suddenly visited by a visitor who asked me to paint an artwork on the theme of human bones. I was surprised, but the client's enthusiasm won out and I accepted the order. This is the art I painted with that order. #Illustration #CommentPls #RTpls

submitted 11 hours ago • 50 comments

submitted 22 hours ago • 0 comments

Animaniacs Theme Song (Island Version)

submitted 23 hours ago • 0 comments

Wearing a red t shirt and khakis and my wife is roasting my ass asking when my target shift starts

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

Read past the headline on this one

submitted 2 days ago • 15 comments

"Is using our product too tedious? Let us use it for you!"

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

"hey chatgpt, live my whole life for me"

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

Oh, so now Millennials aren’t eating enough avocado toast?

submitted 1 day ago • 19 comments

you really only have to work with kids outside of school time for a minute to see how hostile the world is to them and their mere physical presence. when you add in the supremely racist stratification of chicago it only becomes more alarming. people deserve to be somewhere together!!!

submitted 2 days ago • 2 comments

The Beths are so good open.spotify.com/track/6KF6Tk...

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

This is fucking infuriating

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Please don't put it in the newspaper that we, the newspaper, don't know what we put in the newspaper

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

all my boys aging gracefully. we out here tarnishing like an airy meringue, and thrice as sweet

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

lol

submitted 2 days ago • 10 comments

This is so fucking good

submitted 2 days ago • 211 comments

“beat his ass big daddy”

submitted 2 days ago • 4 comments

Ms. Rachel had the same arc as Ta Nehisi Coates where learning the basic facts of the situation made her go “this is unambiguously wrong” and it freaks out the credentialists who think serious people are supposed to say it’s complicated

submitted 2 days ago • 11 comments

My daughter tied her own shoes today unassisted and it made her day

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

it’s monday

submitted 2 days ago • 2 comments

submitted 2 days ago • 1 comment

Now it fits fine

submitted 3 days ago • 1 comment

"in texas a minor may consume an alcoholic beverage as long as it's within direct line of sight of an adult parent, guardian, or spouse" is a sentence that is bad at first blush but doesn't really lift off until the end.

submitted 3 days ago • 7 comments

Just saw a car with A Wilhelm Scream sticker. Hell yeah DSM

submitted 4 days ago • 2 comments