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edmorrish.bsky.social
Leeds man & audio/comedy producer. Work stuff @leadmojo.bsky.social My posts, since you asked: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:zhglb2ub3qwkn2kpxlwekst3/feed/aaaaqszrsfcwo
10,621 posts 19,369 followers 1,127 following
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Posts 34 Comments 16

me: what if having a second spouse turned you into a giant friend: bigamy? me: 𝙢𝙪𝙘𝙝 bigger you.

submitted 3 hours ago • 1 comment

when i joined bluesky two years ago people joked that it was a posting retirement home for 38 year olds but this place has undergone such massive change since then, like the average age is now 40

submitted 2 hours ago • 7 comments

Getting all my Juggalo friends to make donations during the NPR pledge drive.

submitted 1 hour ago • 3 comments

frankly more of you should a) praise me for my timely payment and b) call me "mister fucking leeds"

submitted 1 hour ago • 2 comments

Considering he’s Mister Fucking Leeds, and as a proud Lancastrian woman we should be mortal enemies I have to glaze @edmorrish.bsky.social as he paid me within minutes of receiving my invoice. The only person who ever beat that was the guy who paid me whilst I was on stage.

submitted 1 hour ago • 1 comment

they better let me keep one leg out when they cryogenically freeze me or i’ll never be able to sleep

submitted 11 hours ago • 8 comments

the manic street preachers not splitting up after their first album is why i have trust issues

submitted 3 hours ago • 0 comments

WHY does my cause lose support with younger women along with loads of regressive causes? Common knowledge would suggest it's because history bends towards progress, but get this: I want to pretend my cause isn't regressive at all, so maybe it's because 30yo women are all silly babies

submitted 5 hours ago • 6 comments

finally someone brave enough to say it

submitted 5 hours ago • 1 comment

I refuse to finger the Pillsbury dough boy’s belly button.

submitted 11 hours ago • 17 comments

fair, i guess

submitted 14 hours ago • 1 comment

Hot moms in your area would like a little peace and quiet

submitted 15 hours ago • 2 comments

being intimidated by bluesky is so funny. yeah i keep getting my ass kicked every time i go to bath and body works

submitted 16 hours ago • 132 comments

submitted 16 hours ago • 2 comments

[at zoo] Me: It’d be my greatest honour to feed a baby penguin by hand, sir. Them: I’m just telling you not to stand so close to the exhibit. Me: But how else will I fall in and feed a baby penguin by hand? Them: You’re not— Me: [jumps] Oh nooo I’m falling but it’s lunchtime; how convenient!

submitted 19 hours ago • 1 comment

one thing about me is if you text me asking about european trains i will answer you so comprehensively you will slightly regret it, especially if it includes sleepers the comedian anuvab pal has just found this out the hard way

submitted 19 hours ago • 4 comments

WIFE: whatcha thinking about ME: [wondering how long the word “erode” was a million years ago] history

submitted 23 hours ago • 1 comment

ÁÇÀB includes gendarmes

submitted 2 days ago • 1 comment

there should be an emotional pain scale like 0-10+, how many funny animal reels do you have to watch per day to stay alive

submitted 1 day ago • 16 comments

me: like eleanor roosevelt said, I try to to one thing every day that doesn’t scare me wife: no she said do one thing every day that DOES me: are you sure

submitted 2 days ago • 5 comments

Gonna spend today following my cats into the kitchen & meowing at them until they give me treats

submitted 1 day ago • 3 comments

if i were in charge of microsoft outlook, i would simply not have it turn into an unusuable piece of shit

submitted 1 day ago • 6 comments

Me: What if instead of a cat there’s a shark in the box Schrödinger: You’re missing the point but it's pretty badass

submitted 1 day ago • 18 comments

we could rebrand bombay mix as "mumbai bics" with minimal changes to the package design, but for some reason we choose not to

submitted 1 day ago • 2 comments

If you're voting in the Eisner Awards, please toss a vote my way in the Best Adaptation category! worstjourney.com has some free samples of my work if you haven't had the chance to look at it yet.

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

June the 4th be with you 😎

submitted 1 day ago • 4 comments

face down, ass down, chest down, back down, tentacles - you guessed it - down

submitted 1 day ago • 3 comments

spin with me on tiptoe twirl dizzily to and fro until the seasickness hits and both of us forget the dance was meant to express a soaring joy we are not our pain not broken toys we can fly across the floor with only these hands for wings sweet dreams sway back and forth baby pressed against me

submitted 1 day ago • 3 comments

@mementomorty.bsky.social taught me it was ok to be weird

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Is that little baby really supposed to hush and not say a word so it can have a damn mockingbird? The hell will a baby do with a mockingbird?

submitted 1 day ago • 36 comments

I can smell her skeets on you

submitted 1 day ago • 14 comments

hey i just wanted to let you know, i'm not farting. i'm making fart noises with my mouth and my hands, but that's all there is to it. the noises i'm making are not to cover up that i am also farting for real at the same time. making false fart noises is just something i'm doing for fun.

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

your honor. the defense rests. my client is tired and needs a nap. probably tired from all the murder.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

at 20k followers i will make bomb threats to your places of work

submitted 96 days ago • 7 comments