This is wild to me, because it's the complete opposite of my experience in fandom. Of course, my primary fandom was Buffy, not Trek (I've enjoyed lots of Trek, but never spent time in fandom places for it), and I also know this is a characteristic of male vs. female fannishness, but...
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Lincoln Michel
This quote from @adamkotsko.bsky.social is something that's always fascinated (and weirded me out) about fandom. Sorry to novel plug but also a big part of METALLIC REALMS, which includes a Star Trek-ish space opera franchise.
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https://www.theatlantic.com/entertainment/archive/2015/10/the-rise-of-buffy-studies/407020/