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theonion.com
β’
8 days ago
New Evidence Suggests Humans Developed Written Language To Avoid Breaking Up In Person
https://theonion.com/new-evidence-suggests-humans-developed-written-language-to-avoid-breaking-up-in-person/
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[β]
johnnyred1941.bsky.social
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8 days ago
It was probably a bloke as well π
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[β]
dropcut.bsky.social
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8 days ago
I mean, the Church of England was created so the king could break up π
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[β]
iranphotos.bsky.social
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8 days ago
Fake news! Ghosting was a thing back in my day too. π
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[β]
thadpovey.bsky.social
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8 days ago
@introvertproblems.bsky.social An introvert invented writing
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[β]
blankuitaco.bsky.social
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8 days ago
you almost got me there Onion
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[β]
purpledrazi.bsky.social
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8 days ago
Every skeleton found, accused of ghosting archeologists
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[β]
kamchatkapawn.bsky.social
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8 days ago
And when the inventor realised that she had to teach the ones she did not want to meet, proposed 'backfire' as the word of the year
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[β]
uwops.bsky.social
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8 days ago
Only to have it translated as "fart".
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[β]
re2do.bsky.social
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8 days ago
mandΓ© una seΓ±al de humo, pero estaba lloviendo. Ahora entiendo porque ella me sigue llamando
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[β]
injusticejustice.bsky.social
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8 days ago
... and here comes the text ...
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[β]
annoyed-aldo.bsky.social
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8 days ago
π€£π€£
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[β]
njladeee.bsky.social
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8 days ago
π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£π€ͺ
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[β]
kingmixer.bsky.social
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8 days ago
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
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[β]
jessie-belle.bsky.social
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8 days ago
did someone on the onion's writing staff get broken up with through text
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[β]
uwops.bsky.social
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8 days ago
Well....
let's hope.
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[β]
jessie-belle.bsky.social
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8 days ago
literally what is this implying
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[β]
surgebinder.bsky.social
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8 days ago
No but like, how sure are we that this isn't at least partially true lol
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[β]
yuweiquan.bsky.social
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8 days ago
!!!!
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[β]
thejbarr.bsky.social
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8 days ago
I hate this timeline. I nearly believed this before I saw it was from The Onion
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[β]
uwops.bsky.social
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8 days ago
Makes sense.
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[β]
largesseadultson.bsky.social
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8 days ago
You just know Ea-nΔαΉ£ir never lifted a god damn finger to help out around the house
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[β]
larchwren.bsky.social
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8 days ago
Thank goodness texting has assuaged many faint hearts who need to end relationships.
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[β]
bluedottx3.bsky.social
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8 days ago
π
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[β]
laurie51.bsky.social
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8 days ago
Happy Valentine's Day. We're through.
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[β]
eddieburfi.bsky.social
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8 days ago
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[β]
saddoc.bsky.social
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8 days ago
Or firing Government employees!
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[β]
ajbelmont.bsky.social
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8 days ago
6
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[β]
dailydispatch.bsky.social
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7 days ago
And look where we are now, people prefer to just ghost. LOL.
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[β]
russcardwell.bsky.social
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7 days ago
"It's not you, it's the alphabet."
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[β]
elainerichards.bsky.social
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7 days ago
Jane Wagner, via Lily Tomlin said/wrote, "Man invented language based out of a deep seated need to complain."
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[β]
swozey.bsky.social
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8 days ago
Now its just the block button
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[β]
szeth-son-neturo.bsky.social
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8 days ago
Lol, you got me there for a second π
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let's hope.