Some dastardly fire sorceress scorched "gullible" onto the ceiling of the common area and nobody could clean it off for a week. Most of us were pretty bummed when it got removed tbh
joe told a guy to break into mr robin’s hundred acre mystic woods, climb the tree higher than the stone tower twenty miles west, and to break off the branch third down from the top. opening a rift into the floor below, which you must jump into from the tippy top, all to retrieve his super nintendo.
One of the apprentices decided to jerk off the stone obelisk in the gardens with one of his illusion spells as a bit. Then it came
FUCKING
LAVA
EVERYWHERE
Half of the school burned down because some of the lava jizz landed on the roof, a third of the class had to be treated for severe burns,
one poor sod was so badly burnt he had to be immersed in a health potion tank for a week, and the garden was so thoroughly wrecked we had to scrap our entire horticulture branch.
The only person who wasn't harmed or traumatized was that fucking apprentice. Didn't even get burnt. Fuck that guy.
Testicle Torsion Tuesdays. i remember when the guildmaster started casting a persuasion spell to get people to stop and his shit got twisted clean off right as he got to "alak ma" lmfao
One time an Evoker at mine opened a portal to the shivering isles completely circumventing Sheogorath's authorized entry, forcing everyone in Tamriel to scream nothing but I HAVE NO GREETING.
But the guy responsible got the ol' Punishment Point treatment and the portal closed right up.
Someone - and we're not going to name names here - took issue with the ethics behind the acquisition of several reagents, particularly for the alchemists among the guild. I get it, newt eyes, bat wings, etc is at best kinda squeamish, and at worst may be institutionalised animal abuse, but it has...
To be understood you can't just substitute any material you want into the pot and expect the same result. We are drawing upon the essence of the substance and extending its applications, not just conjuring fireballs from thin air. Though you'll get halfway there thinking you can swap in *flour*
one of the novice mages wanted to pull a prank by making the hallways of the guild have no gravity. unfortunately they ended up performing the spell wrong and for like, a month, we couldn't go into the halls because they'd manage to INCREASE the gravity by a factor of ten.
Friend of mine took revenge on a bully through a Hallow's Eve Prank trying to animate some bones he found on MageBay. He accidentally reinvented necromancy, with the skeletons going wild across the hall. Had to call in the local cleric to banish the dark spirits while he was suspended for 6 months.
Had some knobend accidentally cast “Ire ball” as opposed to Fireball out in the courtyard. Just as someone’s animal messenger came by. Never thought I’d see a hawk pluck a man’s eye out from a dive.
Dave is fine however. Just had a Cleric miracle him up a new eye. He’s scared of hawks now though.
Someone had shattered the Magic Mirror of "Horrific Visions, Catatonic Plagues, and/or Hot Goblins". The wails from the premises could be heard for miles around.
At ours, a nice girl collected live bugs, not sure if they were components or pets. Then, a wretched son of a court wizard got sent to us to keep him out of trouble. One night, he teleported bug girl's door away "as a prank." Every single bug attacked him. His dad got our guild shut down officially.
Some transmutation student turned a handful of teachers into trading cards for a self-designed trading card game. Broken meta and everything. The game eventually got rolled up by faculty and the student sealed in tourmaline
Oh man, where to begin: Television magic abuse caused a whole dorm to be a flesh screen. Firework display in the toilets and a troll breached the walls, it breached the walls, it breached the walls, oh by the divines, it breached the walls
Comments
Let's just say... the foundation for the new building is a bit deeper than the old.
FUCKING
LAVA
EVERYWHERE
Half of the school burned down because some of the lava jizz landed on the roof, a third of the class had to be treated for severe burns,
The only person who wasn't harmed or traumatized was that fucking apprentice. Didn't even get burnt. Fuck that guy.
Which may or may not have exploded our guild building.
But the guy responsible got the ol' Punishment Point treatment and the portal closed right up.
Dave is fine however. Just had a Cleric miracle him up a new eye. He’s scared of hawks now though.
it was not pretty