albertclownstein.bsky.social
Just a nerd
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"Yeah," my attorney said, cracking open another beer. "Also, I think the bus is on fire."
And it was. But that’s another story.
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It was broken because we forgot how to disagree without hating each other.
"Maybe we’re not all the same," I said, watching the horizon blur into darkness. "But that’s what makes it beautiful."
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We hit the road again, feeling like we’d saved the world, or at least a small greasy spoon in the middle of it. As the sun set, painting the sky in a kaleidoscope of colors, I realized my attorney was right: America wasn’t broken because we disagreed.
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The man in the MAGA hat and the Bernie bro even shook hands, though it was clear neither trusted the other entirely. Progress, I thought. Messy, ridiculous progress.
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We need each other, you lunatics!"
For some reason—maybe the booze, maybe the absurdity—this actually worked. Someone started clapping, and soon the whole diner was roaring with laughter and applause.
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Silence fell again. He held up a bottle of hot sauce like it was the Holy Grail. "This," he said, "is what America is: a glorious, messy mix of flavors. Spicy, sweet, sometimes downright bitter. But if you try to separate the ingredients, it all falls apart.
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It was about to get ugly when my attorney stood on a table and shouted, "EVERYONE SHUT UP!"
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But of course, peace is a fragile thing. It wasn’t long before the arguments started. One man in a MAGA hat and another in a "Feel the Bern" T-shirt got into a heated debate over who was ruining the country faster.
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Pancakes started flying out of the kitchen like frisbees at a summer camp. Someone put on Johnny Cash. For a brief, syrupy moment, the divide didn’t matter.
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The place went silent. A burly man in a camo hat looked like he might throw a punch, but then a waitress with a cigarette dangling from her lips muttered, "Hell yeah," and the tension dissolved into chuckles.
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My attorney, already two beers deep by 9:00 a.m., slapped a 20 on the counter and announced, "Pancakes for everyone! Red, blue, or purple, it doesn’t matter. You all bleed maple syrup."
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Our first stop was a diner in Middle-of-Nowhere, USA, where the air smelled like bacon grease and existential dread. Inside, it was a patchwork quilt of America: truckers, soccer moms, and teenagers staring at their phones like they were gazing into the abyss.
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but nobody seemed to notice we were all stuck on the same busted bird, flapping like mad and getting nowhere.
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As the landscape blurred by—a strip mall here, a cow pasture there—I couldn’t help but think about the absurdity of it all. Red states, blue states, left wing, right wing...
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He wasn’t wrong. But I didn’t tell him that because my mouth was currently full of half-melted gummy bears, my makeshift breakfast. "Maybe we’re all idiots," I said, spraying gummy shrapnel across the dashboard. "The real enemy isn’t left or right. It’s the goddamn ego."
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"The trouble with this country," he said, swigging a PBR as the bus coughed and sputtered like it might die any second, "isn't that we're divided. It's that everyone thinks they're the only ones who are right."
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Beside me sat my attorney, a dubious character with a fondness for Hawaiian shirts and an unshakable conviction that duct tape could fix any problem, including democracy itself.
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The mission? A ludicrous one, really: to bridge the political divide of America with nothing but a trunk full of fireworks, two cases of cheap beer, and a belief that people are more alike than they care to admit.
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Probably because Microsoft owns Call of Duty therefore they are advertising their own product.
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It’s the job market. Not you.
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Agreed why turn this place into those places. Keep it different, that’s partly why we came here.
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Even you switched? 😂 This is awesome!
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I’ve met so many people who are one pagers. Their lack of curiosity makes them miss so much stuff.
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Bruh I know it don’t run cod and will need like 50 hard drives just to hold the game. My first pc was a compaq 486/dx2 66mhz 😂
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Legend of Zelda on NES was crack back in the day.
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How long does it take to load call of duty on that thing?