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cheftips.bsky.social
my ass has a Michelin star, eat up
12,405 posts 51,299 followers 630 following
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i made carne asada tacos

i made carne asada tacos

chef tip: make guacamole. eat guacamole. live guacamole.

chef tip: if you are in the store and you don’t feel like squishing an avocado is an accurate enough way to assess ripeness, you can remove the stem cap of the avocado and if it is a nice green color, it is ripe and ready to go.

chef tip: make guacamole. eat guacamole. live guacamole.

chef tip: if you are in the store and you don’t feel like squishing an avocado is an accurate enough way to assess ripeness, you can remove the stem cap of the avocado and if it is a nice green color, it is ripe and ready to go.

For the absolute last time: I *never* said I thought E.T. dressed in the wig and the dress was sexy, I said *I could see why people would think that*

deez nuts know jiu-jitsu

As much as people don't wanna hear it, as much as our country is in terminal Canada shut the fuck up. I will still beat your goddamn ass, even by myself. I am an American veteran. I am tired of him Canadian bullshit, and I will kick the goddamn ass no matter what the goddamn say.

the best genre of music is jazz fusion

“pronouncing” is such a pretentious word, like are you some kind of earl or some shit, why the fuck are you talking so fancy

As much as people don't wanna hear it, as much as our country is in terminal Canada shut the fuck up. I will still beat your goddamn ass, even by myself. I am an American veteran. I am tired of him Canadian bullshit, and I will kick the goddamn ass no matter what the goddamn say.

they should invent

Oh lol so he's definitely gonna win huh?

let these photos of great italian dishes calm you

fuck you for this bullshit propaganda

“materialists” is a movie that delivers much more than advertised with a surprising maturity. worth a watch.

fuck you for this bullshit propaganda

“A deranged maniac impersonated a police officer and killed lawmakers but if you’re an immigrant be sure you immediately comply with plain clothes people who won’t identify themselves telling you to get in a van”, what a fuckin country

let these photos of great italian dishes calm you

gonna see materialists because i have a feeling it’s better than it looks

bunny

this bagel and lox might not be pretty, but it was really good

this bagel and lox might not be pretty, but it was really good

i wanted to write a joke about puns, but it was fucking stupid

have I already mentioned #1 rank for @zohrankmamdani.bsky.social and no rank at all for Cuomo? ok just checking (and let your friends and family know, too)

you wont believe your eyes—The Masturbating Roach . People come from far and wide to see him "Do his thing" . Sponsored by Topgolf

"Were treated like dogs. Theyre making us lay on the floor. Were here to help Waymo" Its ok grandpa. The war ended 40 years ago. Go to sleep

i dont get involved in politics, im not interested in news, but ill gladly let an IDF guy glue my dick hole shut if it'll help him feel safe

tomato

this pizza looks absolutely incredible

audra should have won

this pizza looks absolutely incredible

i could make an entire sauce out of this thing

the worst pop artists currently on the radio are benson boone and gracie abrams. some truly unlistenable stuff from both.

the worst pop artists currently on the radio are benson boone and gracie abrams. some truly unlistenable stuff from both.

tomato

Things are dogshit, but I am very proud to work here today.

If you'll allow me to say it, The Onion is cooking with gas today.

I asked chat gpt if it knew me as a joke, and…i didn’t expect this

I have this joke about Sisyphus but every time you think I'm finished it starts over again at the beginning

Vorhees a jolly good fellow. Vorhees a jolly good fellow.

it’s friday the 13th, which means it’s jason’s birthday! happy birthday jason!!!!