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dorsalstream.bsky.social

You know, for kids. Lapsed philosopher. I do have a (creative nonfiction) newsletter thanks for asking: http://howtotalk.substack.com. For just my posts, click this monstrosity: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:u4p4mzethzbuovsc55tzbdhw/feed/aaaae2trykso

3,821 posts 10,223 followers 508 following

Posts 32 Comments 18

At the NYU basketball games today, and the women’s team is on a 54-game winning streak. The men have only lost once, but as soon as the women’s game ended, the gym emptied.

submitted 31 minutes ago • 0 comments

I’m in quicksand and then I realize it’s actually oatmeal. I start to eat my way out until I realize there’s no sugar, cinnamon or walnuts. Disgusted, I stop eating and let death embrace me.

submitted 2 days ago • 5 comments

Government censor would be a pretty chill job. Just reading books all day and highlighting the spicy bits

submitted 16 hours ago • 0 comments

The promise of Sunday morning

submitted 5 hours ago • 3 comments

When there were just one set of giant footprints on the beach, then up through the harbor and the strewn guts of mighty ships, the razed central business district, the huge statue symbolizing freedom and power toppled with its head kicked blocks away, those were the moments that Godzilla carried me.

submitted 2 days ago • 3 comments

Happy Birthday to WEB Du Bois, who wrote about the wildly important concept of psychological wages of whiteness in the first history of Reconstruction, Black Reconstruction in America, which he messily dedicated to his mistress, Dr. Virginia Alexander, and not his wife, Nina Gomer #BookSky

submitted 6 hours ago • 26 comments

No, I haven’t. The apocalypse adds ten pounds.

submitted 17 hours ago • 0 comments

BREAKING NEWS: Lightning McQueen from the movie Cars has passed away at the age of 22. Mr. McQueen fell asleep in his garage and left himself running

submitted 22 hours ago • 10 comments

The Conclave Oscar promotion efforts have gotten out of hand.

submitted 23 hours ago • 1 comment

People with doctorates are the most liberal and progressive. The entire mission of destroying academia is to eliminate entire voting demographics. They explicitly spell this out. Shutting down PhD programs isn't an accident, it's the goal.

submitted 1 day ago • 41 comments

Important to remember that this administration is doing government by trolling. Executive orders and letters are largely expressions of opinions and threats and not law.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Just so we're clear, when I ask you for your "body count," I'm inquiring about the number of dogs you have petted.

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

Yeah, scrabbling is great and all but lately I've been getting into scampering. Really liking the results. Might be hard to go back, if we're being honest.

submitted 1 day ago • 2 comments

🤔

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Happy birthday to the delightful and necessary @itsabbyyep.bsky.social!

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

I wish I had the optimism of the USPS offering forever stamps

submitted 187 days ago • 3 comments

NOSTRADAMUS: [rising from the grave] my bad, everyone

submitted 2 days ago • 2 comments

Me: A sandwich is a book made of bread that tells the story of the ingredients Bank clerk: frantically pressing the silent alarm

submitted 10 days ago • 21 comments

We inhabit a truly chaotic information environment.

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

is that good

submitted 1 day ago • 72 comments

Costco and Trader Joes are yin and yang. Together they form a harmonious balance. One sells big piles of normal food, the other sells small piles of weird food. These are the two food piles people need

submitted 2 days ago • 115 comments

BANK TELLER: to open an account I'll need a first name ME: Robin BANK TELLER: and a last? ME: Dabanc BANK TELLER: so you're Robin Dabanc Me: slowly reveals gun

submitted 2 days ago • 8 comments

[kitchen nightmares] Gordon Ramsey gave this failing restaurant fresh shrimp. Let’s see if that changes how abusive this daughter is to her mother

submitted 2 days ago • 17 comments

“I just wanna say trans people are beautiful. We are never going to stop existing. I’m never gonna stop being trans, a letter on a passport can’t change that, and fuck this administration.”

submitted 2 days ago • 70 comments

Imagine being a witch and you’re all excited because you just brewed up a wicked potion but then you realize now you gotta clean out that cauldron and it’s too big for the dishwasher ugh

submitted 583 days ago • 16 comments

When there were just one set of giant footprints on the beach, then up through the harbor and the strewn guts of mighty ships, the razed central business district, the huge statue symbolizing freedom and power toppled with its head kicked blocks away, those were the moments that Godzilla carried me.

submitted 2 days ago • 3 comments

I figured out how I'm going to get rich: Male Polish. It's just regular nail polish, but for men. The colors will have names like charred denim, lumber stank, and sea-dude. The applicator will look like a brush for bbq marinade

submitted 2 days ago • 14 comments

so today I was riding the bus, this chicken gets on and starts coughing like crazy. I'm like, hey man what about bird flu? he's talking some nonsense about how he needs to "get to the other side." we're all gonna end up on the other side if you don't put a mask on that beak bro

At the NYU basketball games today, and the women’s team is on a 54-game winning streak. The men have only lost once, but as soon as the women’s game ended, the gym emptied.

I’m in quicksand and then I realize it’s actually oatmeal. I start to eat my way out until I realize there’s no sugar, cinnamon or walnuts. Disgusted, I stop eating and let death embrace me.

Government censor would be a pretty chill job. Just reading books all day and highlighting the spicy bits

The promise of Sunday morning

When there were just one set of giant footprints on the beach, then up through the harbor and the strewn guts of mighty ships, the razed central business district, the huge statue symbolizing freedom and power toppled with its head kicked blocks away, those were the moments that Godzilla carried me.

Happy Birthday to WEB Du Bois, who wrote about the wildly important concept of psychological wages of whiteness in the first history of Reconstruction, Black Reconstruction in America, which he messily dedicated to his mistress, Dr. Virginia Alexander, and not his wife, Nina Gomer #BookSky

No, I haven’t. The apocalypse adds ten pounds.

BREAKING NEWS: Lightning McQueen from the movie Cars has passed away at the age of 22. Mr. McQueen fell asleep in his garage and left himself running

The Conclave Oscar promotion efforts have gotten out of hand.

People with doctorates are the most liberal and progressive. The entire mission of destroying academia is to eliminate entire voting demographics. They explicitly spell this out. Shutting down PhD programs isn't an accident, it's the goal.

Important to remember that this administration is doing government by trolling. Executive orders and letters are largely expressions of opinions and threats and not law.

Just so we're clear, when I ask you for your "body count," I'm inquiring about the number of dogs you have petted.

Yeah, scrabbling is great and all but lately I've been getting into scampering. Really liking the results. Might be hard to go back, if we're being honest.

🤔

Happy birthday to the delightful and necessary @itsabbyyep.bsky.social!

I wish I had the optimism of the USPS offering forever stamps

NOSTRADAMUS: [rising from the grave] my bad, everyone

Me: A sandwich is a book made of bread that tells the story of the ingredients Bank clerk: frantically pressing the silent alarm

We inhabit a truly chaotic information environment.

is that good

Costco and Trader Joes are yin and yang. Together they form a harmonious balance. One sells big piles of normal food, the other sells small piles of weird food. These are the two food piles people need

BANK TELLER: to open an account I'll need a first name ME: Robin BANK TELLER: and a last? ME: Dabanc BANK TELLER: so you're Robin Dabanc Me: slowly reveals gun

[kitchen nightmares] Gordon Ramsey gave this failing restaurant fresh shrimp. Let’s see if that changes how abusive this daughter is to her mother

“I just wanna say trans people are beautiful. We are never going to stop existing. I’m never gonna stop being trans, a letter on a passport can’t change that, and fuck this administration.”

Imagine being a witch and you’re all excited because you just brewed up a wicked potion but then you realize now you gotta clean out that cauldron and it’s too big for the dishwasher ugh

When there were just one set of giant footprints on the beach, then up through the harbor and the strewn guts of mighty ships, the razed central business district, the huge statue symbolizing freedom and power toppled with its head kicked blocks away, those were the moments that Godzilla carried me.

I figured out how I'm going to get rich: Male Polish. It's just regular nail polish, but for men. The colors will have names like charred denim, lumber stank, and sea-dude. The applicator will look like a brush for bbq marinade

so today I was riding the bus, this chicken gets on and starts coughing like crazy. I'm like, hey man what about bird flu? he's talking some nonsense about how he needs to "get to the other side." we're all gonna end up on the other side if you don't put a mask on that beak bro

Chives are sigma

Godzilla is not tubby; he’s just atomically boned.

Please do not talk to me until I've made my little posts.

I think of this meme almost every day