dragalialust.bsky.social
Just your average blue bird refugee | I draw! | queer as all hells | vio rhyse alberia
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If you've come this far, thank you. For reading my shower thoughts at past midnight, for staying with me, for waiting for me. I will be back. Not sure when, or in what capacity, but I want to draw. 🎨
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And to myself, too. But that was overshadowed by having an audience - which I still do, and I still appreciate each and every one of you - but... yeah. This is kind of why I've been MIA for these past months. I want to feel good and positive about art again. And until then, I'll take it slow.
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It's okay to take a step back, to feel into yourself, see what's important to you. And it's okay to not be creative or productive in your free time. Hell, I've been a fucking sloth and I still feel bad about it, because I always thought I had this responsibility. To you guys.
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I'm not even sure where I'm going with this, and I don't mean to complain. Overall, I'm in a good place, I'm not in immediate danger of war, politics, climate change. I'm living a fairly comfortable life. But I searched for things that are going wrong, and felt worse for it.
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Now does this mean I want to quit art forever? Fuck no! But it sort of faded out of my immediate perception, my immediate focus. I've suffered a severe injury last year and was knocked out for the past months especially, and I feel like I'm still recovering. I don't want to "grind". I want to heal.
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Back then, I used art as an outlet. As something to unwind, to express myself, to "escape" into a world that seemed so much nicer. I still do that - but my focus shifted, as I grow older and work more, I have even less time for the things I really like.
And I learned that it's okay to step back.
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Times are chaotic, there's a lot of turmoil politically and in the "real world", and I never wanted to let it seep into my online persona/work. But frankly, I'm scared. It's scary. Life out there? It's scary, and we as a species manage to make things a whole shit ton worse with each passing day.
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And while I made the conscious decision a decade ago to not pursue an art related dayjob - my hobby turned into what I feared would happen if I chose it as a dayjob: A chore. And I still feel it nag at me. I want to draw, but I don't want to draw.
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These past years, I've drawn a ton. Whether it was commission work (90%) or personal work (10%), I was always working "while at work" (aka my dayjob), or after work (aka in my free time, effectively preventing myself from ever taking "time off" for real for realsies). Art became work.
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We all know what happened to blue bird, and the events following it. I'm honestly relieved and happy to be here, on this website - and while I love the networking and positivity, I also discovered for myself that just shutting things off COMPLETELY is... cleansing. It's healing in itself.
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Sorry its on the 24th where I live so you gotta deal with it
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That said I will work on commissions soon too. Y’all have been saints waiting for me 😭 thankfully I’m almost fully recovered
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Yeah she is............. I caved and pulled her + her gear lmao
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Oh fuck I love her cyber ninja outfit dhskfbdk
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10/10 would pet
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Does it work 👉👈
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I will probably never get the Relink treatment for Dragalia that we all deserve... so Mydei HSR... save me... 😭