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feast-of-bone.bsky.social
24. it/its. tw for SH, ED, drugs, trauma, etc. MDNI 🔞
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drawing tdick to quell The Voices

don wana go to my apointment i wana stay home n be schizo in peace

what if no one abused me and i was just born a sexual deviant :( what if i falsely accused him

tw bc arm check gained a lot. im so flabby now. trying not to let it get me down

its good that im too socially isolated to access hard drugs bc even dxm has me wishing i could trip 24/7

none of this is self deprecation. im just reminding myself who i am. i mustn't forget im subhuman

stupid of me to think i was mature enough for any relationship. im meant to be alone and invisible. how many tragedies will it take for me to learn that

need more bruises need more pain maybe someone will love me then

i have only my shame

compulsive sexual behaviors

i just want to safely regress just once just once

hes alive. i think i died a hundred times waiting for his reply. nothing is real. nothing has meaning. i despise every inch of myself

checking the same 2 apps for hours waiting for him to say hes still alive

i dont have blades that r sharp enough for what i want to do to myself

sick sick sick sick sick im so sick im so sick i want to cut open my soft little tumy and pull out all my ugly rotten insides and string them around my neck as a noose

so tired i dont want to heal now that im safe i want to wallow in all the horrific shit that happened

anyway things are rocky at the new place but more stable than i could have ever hoped for and now i have to figure out how to live again

tw csa crazy how being sexually exploited pre puberty makes me feel like im a decade and a half past my prime at 24!! lmao!! my youth is gone and no one will love me because i am old and ugly and impure

today the bus driver told me i was the lightest wheelchair hes ever had to lift

i dont think i feel good

anyyway i foudn a new fav sh methkd BRUISING mylegs r sooo pretyy annd i can hust say its a chronuc ilness thing (which it also is )

whats funy is that i was just talkign yestrday abt how i havntt atempted in a whule and how i dint even feel suicdal anymtoe LOL stuoif bitch u have bpd !!!!!!!! have u elarned. nithing

oh wow my vision is really funy

idont rember how maby i took it wasbt thay much itgought ?? i hysr wabted evrything ti stop hurtung

just got to keep having my breakdowns quietly and far away from anyone who might be hurt by them

im so fucking depressed why am i depressed i should be happy and relieved and energized but i cant feel anything except shame and emptiness

btw theres a minor w no age in bio who's going around following mdni accounts and then getting upset when they get blocked. idk why minors think the concept of boundaries doesn't apply to them. if u cant follow a simple and obvious boundary then ur not mature enough to follow me anyway