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m1keonl1ne.bsky.social
extremely normal extremely normal posts: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaajypeq6itvw
2,421 posts 3,631 followers 806 following
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Posts 46 Comments 4

Mr. Drugs United States, Census, 1910

submitted 4 hours ago • 5 comments

"Holy fuck, why did you wait for me to judge them? Why didn't you do something when you could have? Didn't you realize that by the time I did my judging thing it would be pointless and far too late?" - History

submitted 14 hours ago • 3 comments

Either somebody tells me what extortion means or I am going to start breaking kneecaps

submitted 6 hours ago • 5 comments

Someone just drove past my house blasting Fetty Wap and I was instantly transported to 2015 drinking UV Blue and Gatorade wearing a bandage dress.

submitted 23 hours ago • 16 comments

Dear Manager, 1. I drank a whiskey drink. 2. I drank a vodka drink. 3. I drank a lager drink. 4. I drank a cider drink. 5. I sang the songs that remind me of the good times; I sang the songs that remind me of the better times.

submitted 5 hours ago • 240 comments

Happy Caturday!

submitted 1 day ago • 6 comments

No, that's my melancholy. Get your own.

submitted 7 hours ago • 0 comments

hey siri wtf is my deal

submitted 20 hours ago • 2 comments

I love O BROTHER, WHERE ART THOU? almost irrationally. George Clooney is just about at his funniest best as an insufferable blowhard. Even John Turturro's teeth are funny. A film that is as much of a pleasure to listen to as it is to watch.

submitted 8 hours ago • 229 comments

If you can't afford fresh laughter, canned is fine

submitted 6 hours ago • 1 comment

Your favorite Simpsons episode tells me everything I need to know.

submitted 18 hours ago • 112 comments

February out there saying, "Wait, I'm not done."

submitted 19 hours ago • 0 comments

We should do an "r" transplant from February to Sherbet

submitted 16 hours ago • 5 comments

Women have to do EVERYTHING

submitted 15 hours ago • 4 comments

Souvenirs are like "here, please remember my vacation that I took without you"

submitted 18 hours ago • 12 comments

who up anthropomorphizing they inanimate objects

submitted 17 hours ago • 22 comments

2:30 AM to 3 AM is strictly reserved for lamenting that which never was and will never be

submitted 13 hours ago • 0 comments

*sends you a Spotify link* *proceeds to write my name with your last name*

submitted 17 hours ago • 21 comments

If posts about buttholes are your breaking point, the internet might not be for you.

submitted 16 hours ago • 12 comments

alien vs predator vs plessy vs ferguson

submitted 15 hours ago • 2 comments

The sun should kill itself

submitted 1 day ago • 12 comments

Driftwood Brown Ale by 3 Sons Brown Ale - 6.5% ABV Dania Beach, FL

submitted 14 hours ago • 1 comment

Red Bug Red by Oviedo Red Ale - 5.3% ABV Oviedo, FL

submitted 14 hours ago • 0 comments

I saw a stick this morning that for a split second made me believe I could be a wizard

submitted 20 hours ago • 23 comments

I really just want to move to a place big enough to practice my nunchucks better.

submitted 14 hours ago • 1 comment

Utter bullshit that shoestring fries don't taste anything like shoestrings

submitted 19 hours ago • 0 comments

It’s only premarital sex if you plan to get married.

submitted 22 hours ago • 11 comments

Wish I could shoot ink out of my nipples, like a titty octopus.

submitted 1 day ago • 35 comments

Shit has to change I'm not sure why I have to change with it

submitted 23 hours ago • 0 comments

i got stung by a radioactive bee i can't fly or make honey, but my knees look fucking spectacular

submitted 1 day ago • 9 comments

I'm starting to think that the Russia thing wasn't a hoax.

submitted 1 day ago • 209 comments

Stay humble by listening to a recording of your own voice.

submitted 1 day ago • 22 comments

microdosing falling in love by eating a singular butterfly

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

STOP reading books and START drinking paint

submitted 1 day ago • 32 comments

The proper shit post to sincere post ratio is 50:1

submitted 1 day ago • 23 comments

Nipples are the eyes of the chest

submitted 1 day ago • 18 comments

Vegetarians be like was this a free range leaf

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

I’m not kink shaming but I am kink asking what the fuck.

submitted 1 day ago • 4 comments

There’s nothing wrong with being squishy. People like squishy. Nobody is buying turgidmallows.

submitted 1 day ago • 8 comments

Where is foghorn leghorn from I want my kids to talk like that

submitted 1 day ago • 13 comments

Oh I met an 83 year old woman at work today who was celebrating having finally paid off all her debt btw

submitted 1 day ago • 2 comments

I WANT TO BELIEVE

submitted 1 day ago • 47 comments

I’m tired, but in a good way says no one.

submitted 2 days ago • 4 comments

Too bad the Incredible Hulk couldn’t make it to help out with that other hulk, probably busy doing something else

submitted 1 day ago • 34 comments

If life imitates art then this one's a Jackson Pollock.

submitted 2 days ago • 1 comment

You know which house needs a deep clean? The House of Representatives.

submitted 1 day ago • 2 comments