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momspotstash.bsky.social
I used to be funny on the other app. Creative Profesh. Loves dogs, horror, and fart jokes. She/Her My stash: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:6cvoaonbohssdjhqlu3vp6qe/feed/aaaee6vuxcj6s
196 posts 841 followers 543 following
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Posts 44 Comments 3

a gender that’s just the drums in the intro to weezer’s sweater song

submitted 5 days ago • 8 comments

I can't handle the cold hard truth, gimme the hot soft truth

submitted 5 days ago • 14 comments

[walking by a pile of defrosted vomit on Brooklyn sidewalk] Unique New York, Unique New York

submitted 9 days ago • 7 comments

I love abstract art. If I wanted to see things that looked like things, I would look at things.

submitted 9 days ago • 18 comments

I'll be pulling the "I'm sorry I'm new here" 2 years into a job

submitted 11 days ago • 9 comments

I'm a loather, not a fighter.

submitted 11 days ago • 8 comments

I will die on any one of these hills, I really do not care

submitted 12 days ago • 12 comments

god I'm starving, you know what I could use right now? an infant so tender and mild

submitted 12 days ago • 109 comments

Just doggy paddling through life

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

I majored in "Worrying Too Much About the Wrong Stuff"

submitted 13 days ago • 9 comments

wishing that incoming asteroid safe travels

submitted 16 days ago • 21 comments

diarrhea for thee but not for me

submitted 16 days ago • 8 comments

"No, that's actually my creator. You can just call me Monster."

submitted 17 days ago • 1 comment

i’m not like the other girls, because the other girls are markedly better

submitted 27 days ago • 4 comments

Garbanzo beans sounds like they were named by The Muppets

submitted 17 days ago • 6 comments

might eat a banana today just to peel something

submitted 17 days ago • 1 comment

When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, it makes the whole world blind because we’re not supposed to have moons nor pizza in our eyes

submitted 17 days ago • 0 comments

forgot my give a fucks in my other jeans

submitted 17 days ago • 2 comments

I have a yearbook signature to live up to

submitted 18 days ago • 6 comments

My dad died smelling some teen spirit you son of a bitch

submitted 18 days ago • 6 comments

INVENTOR OF THE CAR HORN: and this will make people better drivers

submitted 18 days ago • 81 comments

Mike’s Difficult Lemonade

submitted 18 days ago • 4 comments

You should take my advice, I'm not using it

submitted 91 days ago • 5 comments

Maybe we can stop the technocracy if we just let them have their ai girlfriends and act like it’s not weird.

submitted 18 days ago • 5 comments

[threatening a baby] here comes the airplane

submitted 18 days ago • 139 comments

Some people are so dumb you can hear them using the wrong their/they’re/there out loud

submitted 18 days ago • 9 comments

The tv volume MUST be an even number or multiple of 5, sorry I don’t make the rules

submitted 18 days ago • 5 comments

Ya like tshirt cannons? Man, you're gonna love the pantyhose

submitted 19 days ago • 3 comments

has anyone let houston know how bad the problem is yet?

submitted 18 days ago • 2 comments

New pfp so people stop putting me on ai slop lists jfc can I live

submitted 18 days ago • 0 comments

If you had a nickel for every plane accident that occurred in 2025 you still couldn’t afford to buy a carton of eggs, but you would have a lot more nickels than you expected.

submitted 18 days ago • 2 comments

Tech bro? I'm more of a wreck, bro.

submitted 31 days ago • 0 comments

I didn't mean to ruffle your feathers. Also, why do you have feathers?

submitted 18 days ago • 5 comments

PLANE: [goes down] DJ KHALED: oh gross

submitted 19 days ago • 9 comments

"Two thumbs up!" - An octopus critic trashing a movie

submitted 19 days ago • 12 comments

click click the tongs or get out of the kitchen

submitted 19 days ago • 2 comments

if ‘jr’ is junior, then i use my phone camera to scan qunior codes

submitted 19 days ago • 7 comments

my walk up song is the sound of me falling down and yelling i'm ok

submitted 19 days ago • 21 comments

be careful out there today it’s very real lifey

submitted 19 days ago • 4 comments

My family crest has a toaster hanging precariously over a bathtub

submitted 18 days ago • 5 comments

The best part of fight club are the coffee breaks and cookies.

submitted 18 days ago • 2 comments

I am what I am (a yam)

submitted 18 days ago • 1 comment

PLUTO👏 IS👏 NOT👏 A👏PLANET👏 PLUTO👏 IS👏 A👏 DOG👏

submitted 19 days ago • 9 comments

after much consideration i have decided to keep posting

submitted 19 days ago • 5 comments