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pallenz.bsky.social
Muppet, Delinquent, Agent of Tomfoolery.
77 posts 178 followers 58 following
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Posts 30 Comments 18

What I say here tonight is not up for debate Other debate team captain under their breath: "fuck he's good"

submitted 13 days ago • 2 comments

do you have any idea just how badly you have to fuck up to get Canada mad at you

submitted 126 days ago • 1679 comments

in the jeans factory spinning around in the big stone washer. security can't do shit, I've become too smooth to grab

submitted 150 days ago • 8 comments

my beautiful bride says I spend too much time on social media. oh great and now the priest is agreeing with her

submitted 153 days ago • 7 comments

I need to leave for an empty space now.

submitted 154 days ago • 0 comments

beef stew is short for beef stewart

submitted 157 days ago • 8 comments

First of all it totally messes up your hair

submitted 157 days ago • 2 comments

The clouds are trimmed with glowing sunset.

submitted 158 days ago • 0 comments

(experiencing misery caused by socioeconomic injustice) This is terrible! I must work hard so that someday perhaps I can be on the causing side

submitted 158 days ago • 23 comments

[going through the details] oh shit, the devil's in here

submitted 158 days ago • 10 comments

It gives me great comfort when manufacturers of face cream and toothpaste put "developed by dermatologists" and "developed by dentists" on their packaging. Helps me distinguish from those face creams and toothpastes developed by accountants and forklift operators.

submitted 158 days ago • 9 comments

Fix widespread illiteracy now 🗣️

submitted 157 days ago • 0 comments

Movies can have sex scenes as long as before the scene the characters turn to the camera and explain that it's all pretend so I don't get nervous

submitted 157 days ago • 34 comments

The problem with not sinking into the abyss is that the abyss is warm and comfy and has ergonomically designed seating for perfect relaxation into nothing.

submitted 157 days ago • 4 comments

every post is a banger if you never check the interactions on it after posting.

submitted 161 days ago • 16 comments

Happy new year handsome people and such. Xx (You are all handsome in your own ways)

submitted 159 days ago • 0 comments

a conspiracy theory:

submitted 162 days ago • 8 comments

Imagine the shock when you leave your cocoon and now you’re so beautiful and you have wings

submitted 161 days ago • 0 comments

Please; I implore you.

submitted 161 days ago • 0 comments

They should make the aether much more readily accessible. For little timeouts and such.

submitted 161 days ago • 0 comments

i believe that through his name all things are goated

submitted 161 days ago • 3 comments

I am constantly on this platform.

submitted 161 days ago • 0 comments

I am bored. Please don’t respect my privacy at this time. Thank you all.

submitted 161 days ago • 0 comments

Permission to refer to the jury as chat, Your Honour.

submitted 161 days ago • 0 comments

Getting stabbed with a sword is not only painful but also hurtful. Like, this is how much i do not like you

submitted 163 days ago • 4 comments

willem dafriend or willem dafoe?

submitted 163 days ago • 0 comments

Haven’t greased the bacon trail in well over a year. *puts finger to earpiece I’m being told by the booth that referring to sex as, “greasing the bacon trail,” may be the #1 reason I am not having sex.

submitted 163 days ago • 0 comments

i have short term memory loss issues, so if i skeet the same thing more than once pls just pat me on the head and give me a pudding cup.

submitted 162 days ago • 9 comments

Can you repeat the question, Your Honor, I have the attention spa- heyyy why don’t you wear a wig like they do in England?

submitted 162 days ago • 1 comment

Can’t believe we’ve got ranked Bluesky now.

submitted 162 days ago • 0 comments