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reke.bsky.social
Tuve mi peak en el kinder y después ya no supe qué hacer
19 posts 30 followers 94 following
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Posts 47 Comments 2

Do you think sea horses know about land horses?

submitted 4 days ago • 23 comments

The only way to obtain enlightenment is to order it off of the Secret Menu.

submitted 2 days ago • 1 comment

If it looks like a duck, swims like a duck, and quacks like a duck, it’s another brilliant performance by Daniel Day-Lewis

submitted 19 days ago • 35 comments

It never fails: whenever I'm at a crime scene, analyzing blood spatter and bullet trajectories, someone always assumes I'm CSI.

submitted 22 days ago • 5 comments

Crypto guy in 2014: Crypto will revolutionize finance and change how we interact with money Crypto in 2025:

submitted 23 days ago • 148 comments

Kendrick Lamar should provide a service where he outs a sexual predator of your choosing, via a wildly successful song on multiple platforms.

submitted 23 days ago • 5 comments

We’ve become used to right wingers throwing tantrums every time black people are on tv in something everyone is watching (the olympics, superbowl, ect) but it’s actually fucking weird and we shouldn’t act like that’s a normal reaction

submitted 23 days ago • 88 comments

“Why don’t they play popular music at the Super Bowl anymore.” — Man who thinks 1996 was 10 years ago.

submitted 24 days ago • 1058 comments

Sometimes I'll just make thumbnail graphics for YouTube videos that don't exist.

submitted 27 days ago • 343 comments

submitted 29 days ago • 34 comments

What if the microplastics are actually keeping us beautiful into our 30s as opposed to those guys from like 100 years ago who looked busted as hell at that age

submitted 29 days ago • 209 comments

y'all ever see a take so bad you are forced to immediately go to sleep?

submitted 29 days ago • 160 comments

I picked the wrong time to not be extremely wealthy.

submitted 29 days ago • 26 comments

A sad truth we all need to accept is that Smashing Pumpkins were clearly the best of the big-name 90s alt rock groups

submitted 30 days ago • 702 comments

My issue with AI is 1) for me, it malfunctions more often than any new technology of my lifetime and 2) the biggest proponents *clearly* hold it as a religious belief (This is the Second Coming, this will usher in a utopia, the unprepared will be Left Behind, so give us all the money)

submitted 38 days ago • 31 comments

If you're wondering what happened to your favorite middle-aged actor, they're currently starring in a CBS drama called something like 'Chicago Law', it's in its 14th season, has 450 episodes and 50 time the audience of 'Severance.' Their co-star is someone previously thought was dead.

submitted 36 days ago • 23 comments

The fact that Deepseek R1 was released three days /before/ Stargate means these guys stood in front of Trump and said they needed half a trillion dollars while they knew R1 was open source and trained for $5M. Beautiful.

submitted 37 days ago • 414 comments

I have a note from my doctor that says everyone has to be nice to me

submitted 37 days ago • 288 comments

Hit home today that Elon’s zooming in to a rally of the German hard right to tell them to stop feeling bad about the past and embrace German glory was right before Holocaust Remembrance day.

submitted 37 days ago • 882 comments

Can a headline alone be eligible for a Pulitzer?

submitted 47 days ago • 787 comments

My favorite thing about documentaries? Well first of all, they’re depressing, which I love. But I also enjoy being emotionally tortured by a tragedy I’m powerless to change

submitted 47 days ago • 12 comments

submitted 54 days ago • 0 comments

My cats are roundhouse kicking everything and I blame myself for letting them stay up late to watch Roadhouse with me

submitted 65 days ago • 20 comments

My main resolution for 2025 is to slowly disappear into a fog or mist

submitted 67 days ago • 10 comments

Crabwalking into the new year

submitted 67 days ago • 1 comment

Turns out my ribs weren’t supposed to be making that xylophone sound

submitted 80 days ago • 20 comments

Wham did not have to go so hard on “Last Christmas”

submitted 78 days ago • 392 comments

Christmas is a happy time for many but this year please take a moment to remember all the people who’ve died trying to imitate Mr Bean’s turkey-on-head routine from “Merry Christmas, Mr. Bean”

submitted 78 days ago • 64 comments

SCROOGE (Walton Goggins) (VO): It had been seven years Old Marley had been dead. Unless this is known, nothing fantastic can be understood MARLEY (Danny McBride) flings open BEDROOM DOOR: Hey Scrooge what's up you sassy son of a bitch. Who decorated this place Jack the Ripper

submitted 79 days ago • 61 comments

by the santa clause rules luigi magione is now the ceo of united healthcare

submitted 83 days ago • 15 comments

Santa Claus is coming to town. And this time, it's personal.

submitted 84 days ago • 0 comments

Waluigi Mangione is a doctor who revived a CEO after a heart attack.

submitted 86 days ago • 59 comments

yes, next question.

submitted 89 days ago • 8 comments

i'm betting against myself so i kinda can't lose

submitted 89 days ago • 0 comments

Be the DB Cooper you wish to see in the world

submitted 89 days ago • 21 comments

joseph: we have to walk to bethlehem for a census thing mary, 9 months pregnant: i’m sorry what

submitted 89 days ago • 20 comments

My Dad lacks confidence as a hardware store Santa, but he is greatly admired by his subordinates. He has Lowes Elf Esteem

submitted 89 days ago • 59 comments

Probably the best time in history to be a mathematician was around 600 BC when you could get rich just for discovering triangles

submitted 90 days ago • 57 comments

Ayer abrieron un Soriana por mi casa y fui como buen naco a comprar pan dulce en la inauguración. Nunca había sido tan feliz

submitted 90 days ago • 0 comments

No me parece justo que solo porque un wey en Mesopotamia inventó la agricultura yo tengo que saber usar excel

submitted 90 days ago • 0 comments

how come you can only be a pretender to the monarchy. i have decided i am a pretender to the management of the taco bell by my house

submitted 90 days ago • 2 comments

American Beauty (1999), directed by Sam Mendes

submitted 90 days ago • 0 comments

Me: Hey can you do your dishes My roommate The Buddha: Perhaps your problem is not my dishes but your attachment to a clean sink Me: Alright man

submitted 90 days ago • 348 comments

A mi si me interesan sus wrapped de Spotify, quiero juzgar en silencio sus gustos culeros, robarles bandas si veo que tienen buen gusto, es un ganar por todos lados

submitted 91 days ago • 0 comments

There’s a lot of good people in the world. 17, maybe more

submitted 92 days ago • 5 comments

Caillou: I wanted to ride on the fire truck Caillou’s Mom: I know, Caillou Caillou’s Dad: I shave your head every night while you’re asleep

submitted 92 days ago • 12 comments

Failed my audition for Slipknot even though I explained to them that my proposed persona, “a perfectly normal clown”, would make their existing clown look even scarier by comparison 😞

submitted 92 days ago • 21 comments