shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social - Profile | ThreadSky | a Reddit-style client for Bluesky

The use of self-harm by abusers to play the victim and falsely accuse their partners is one of the most malicious tactics used by perpetrators of coercive control.

submitted 15 minutes ago • 0 comments

Abuse is isolating. Even with people around you, but no one sees what you’re truly going through. The world sees the brave face, while you struggle in silence. You long to reach out, but you feel trapped & fear no one would believe the reality of your experience.

submitted 9 hours ago • 0 comments

Whether you are religious or non-religious, marriage never has been and never will be a vow to be abused. #domesticabuseawareness

submitted 12 hours ago • 0 comments

What has been broken, can be mended. #healingjourney

submitted 16 hours ago • 0 comments

This survivor story highlights how digital surveillance can be weaponized as a means of control, often disguised as care and concern.

submitted 18 hours ago • 1 comment

Abusers often use past trauma as a way to explain their actions, portraying themselves as victims who can’t control their behavior. While everyone’s past shapes who they become, it is not acceptable to use it as an excuse for abuse. They choose to abuse and they are accountable

submitted 20 hours ago • 0 comments

Sexual coercion is a serious form of abuse that manipulates consent through guilt, pressure, and threats. Learn how to identify common tactics used by abusers and take steps to protect yourself.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Question: “How could you have fallen for someone like that?” Answer: Abusers are often charming at first. They know how to make you feel special and loved. The control only start once they’ve gained your trust, making it easy to miss the warning signs early on. #CoerciveControl

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Abusers are masters at twisting reality to suit their narrative, making you feel like you're the problem while they play the victim. Don’t be fooled by their manipulations—you deserve the truth, not their hypocrisy. #CoerciveControl #emotionalabuse

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

By reclaiming yourself, you are setting a new standard for your life: one where respect, love, and kindness prevail. #healingjourney

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

Abusers are master illusionists, presenting one face to the world while harboring a completely different, destructive persona behind closed doors.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

There’s a fine line between attentiveness & control. If your partner makes decisions for you without input, it’s control. They may insist on driving you, plan your time, or dictate your social life & home. This strips your autonomy & fosters dependence. #CoerciveControl

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

In a disturbing case of domestic abuse, 22-year-old Tamour Nawaz has been sentenced to prison for subjecting his own mother to a campaign of coercive control, intimidation, and violence.

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

Read the journey of a survivor as she recounts the escalating control and abuse in her marriage and how she finally broke free.

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

You ignore their provoking messages and refuse to engage. So they hit you with: “You’re so cold. I don’t even recognize you anymore.” They are baiting you. When you don’t give them the response they want, they switch tactics—guilt-tripping, playing the victim, or accusing you of being the problem.

submitted 2 days ago • 1 comment

Abuse isn’t always strict orders—it’s often the illusion of choice. They manipulate you into thinking you have a say, but constant criticism & emotional attacks push you to do what they want. It’s control without looking like control. Awareness is key to breaking free.

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

You might think that if you give into an abuser's demands, they will be satisfied and things will get better. Sadly, it never works this way. They will expect more and more of you until you have nothing left to give. #emotionalabuse

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

You are enough. Never forget that. Embrace your worth. 🌸💪 #SelfWorth #SelfLove

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

After enduring 25 years of emotional abuse and coercive control that left her feeling hopeless, Donna found the courage to escape her toxic marriage and rebuild her life.

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

#FinancialAbuse post-separation can be devastating. Abusers may block access to joint accounts, refuse child support, or work cash jobs to avoid payments. This control tactic leaves you vulnerable & struggling to meet basic needs, regardless of the impact on the children.

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

Survivors of domestic abuse often face systemic failures, with courts, police, and social services frequently perpetuating cycles of harm.

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Netflix's released of 'American Murder: Gabby Petito' brings renewed attention to Gabby’s heartbreaking case, revealing the clear signs of coercive control through her videos, messages, and testimony from those who knew her. 💔

submitted 3 days ago • 1 comment

Many have asked why I don’t mention narcissism in my posts, even though I’m often describing narcissistic behavior. The reason I don’t is that I believe it’s more important to focus on what abusers do and how their behavior affects you, rather than dissecting why they are the way they are.

submitted 3 days ago • 4 comments

Moving on' from domestic abuse is often spoken about like it’s one step, but it’s a journey that involves so many little moments of strength, patience, and compassion for yourself. Physically leaving is just the beginning - the psychological side requires time, inner work and gentleness.

submitted 3 days ago • 1 comment

Abusers see boundaries as an absolute affront and a direct challenge to their authority and control. #coercivecontrol

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Go easy on yourself. It's a process! #mentalhealth

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Love bombing may feel like true love, but survivors know how it hides manipulation and control. Here they share the red flags of love bombing they wish they’d noticed sooner.

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

The invisible cage of #coercivecontrol is built piece by piece: 🔹 Criticism erodes self-esteem 🔹 Financial control limits independence 🔹 Isolation cuts off support 🔹 Gaslighting distorts reality These tactics trap you. Coercive control is abuse.

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Non-fatal strangulation is an extremely dangerous abuse tactic with severe risks and a strong link to future violence.

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

Abusers demand attention when you're busy. Their entitlement means they won’t respect your time & will interrupt, expecting instant focus. If you don’t comply, they may rage, pout, act aggressively, or go silent. It’s a control tactic. 🚩

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

It's ok to yearn for the person you thought they were in the beginning, but eventually we have to come out of that place and remind ourselves that they never really were that person. It was all part of the act to hook us in. #toxicrelationships #healingjourney

submitted 4 days ago • 2 comments

Don't let anyone shrink your world to satisfy their need for control —your life is yours to live fully. #CoerciveControl

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

Abusers often apply double standards, forcing their partner to endlessly adhere to unreasonable rules while they disregard them without consequence.

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

“You should’ve seen the red flags.” Hindsight is always clearer, but abusers are often experts at manipulation. Blaming survivors for not recognizing warning signs ignores the complexity of abusive dynamics. Instead, focus on supporting their recovery, not on dissecting their past.

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

The threat of non-consensual sharing of intimate images, also known as revenge porn, preys on a victim’s vulnerability, trust, and privacy, turning intimate moments into a weapon of fear and control.

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

Story of my marriage! “The man who has explosive, unreasonable rages toward his partner has a deep belief that the woman exists to meet his needs... he wants a genie in a bottle, not a real-life woman.” (Lundy Bancroft) #CoerciveControl

submitted 5 days ago • 1 comment

True love supports your growth and individuality; it never seeks to confine or control you. #emotionalabuse #abusiverelationship

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

The only person that is threatened by your independence and autonomy is one who wishes to control you. #coercivecontrol #emotionalabuse

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

Declarations of love can be used as a weapon by abusers who control, confuse, and dominate while hiding behind a mask of affection.

submitted 5 days ago • 1 comment

Healing is reclaiming yourself. It’s picking up hobbies they made you quit. Wearing clothes they disapproved of. Chasing dreams you put on hold. Reconnecting with friends they pushed away. Finding your voice & refusing to silence it. Healing is finding you again. #HealingJourney

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

As a result of gradual conditioning and emotional manipulation, it often takes domestic abuse victims years to realize they are being abused. Survivors share why it was so hard for them to see the abuse.

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

Manipulation includes #gaslighting—twisting reality so you doubt your memory, perceptions, & sanity. They may dismiss your feelings, shift blame, or make you feel like the villain. This obscures their abuse & makes it harder to leave.

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

An abuser's criticism is about diminishing you so they feel better about themselves. #coercivecontrol

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

Your life, your choice! #coercivecontrol

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments