sir-pumpkin-knight.bsky.social
Just here for RPG stuff, snarkery, and maybe some pictures that need to be put in an untitled folder.
2,061 posts
621 followers
517 following
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And how does her husband tell this story?
"My maid mommy had to be an adult and clean up my mess. What a bitch, amirite? Who's round is it? I gotta kill another two hours for the kids to be in bed before I get home."
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So much for schools being safer with gun owners around, eh Maga?
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Artist: "See, my latest idea, right, is this slutty high-school girl can travel back in time, but only by taking her panties off, which of course destroys them, so she needs the protag to carry more around for her like a living panty-drawer!"
Crunchyroll: "We'll buy it!"
Me: "...Bruh..."
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"What's your wish, Master?"
"Already got it, thanks."
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Trump: "I only hire the brightest and the best!"
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They ding, ding, dong. Ringa ding, ding, dong.
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Ah, a refreshing change of pace from the standard 2-Skulls bra of evil women fame, yes, yes...
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I actually couldn't remember their name, but I checked and some people eat cantaloupes at breakfast time.
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Finally, my breakfast melon slingshot machine will soon be complete.
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That's a "gun" I'd love to cock!
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Yeaaaah... remember when people said women were too emotional to be president? Kinda can't imagine Harris getting into a "NUH-UH, YOU ARE!!!" fight on the internet.
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Because the internet is forever. Polaroids can be burned as soon as the SWAT van rolls onto the yard.
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We're all jealous of that tie.
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(Don't make a snatch joke, don't make a snatch joke, don't make a snatch joke...)
...Nice pussy willows!
(Nailed it.)
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Remember how some people said women were too emotional to be president?
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The 80's were weird.
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I would like to see a flowchart of the mental gymnastics he had to perform to think this would end any differently... unless this IS how he wanted it to end so he could break up with her for being "unreasonable."
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Fun fact to bore people with at parties: There's only two species that catch a disease that makes malformed horn-like growths form on their head. One is a rabbit, and the other is a spider. Because spiders weren't awful enough without deformed heads.
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This remake of the Scarlet Pimpernel is way better than the book version.
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That back-arch finish.
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"Sir, your Maga membership is in danger of being revoked for admitting to atheism. Do you have anything to say in your defense?"
"I want a barely legal partner who's not even half my age that I'm gonna treat like a walking flesh-light?"
"You're free to go. Have a nice day, sir."
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I guess "I got fooled by the most obvious huckster on the planet" is less embarrassing for them than "Turns out it wasn't worth tanking the economy just to black-bag Mexicans. My bad."
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(Grain of salt on this one)
I saw a repost of a former Trump supporter renouncing his affiliation and abandoning Trumpism. Even then, he tried to balm his ego by talking about what a cunning schemer and master manipulator Trump is. They kiss his ass even after they leave him.
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Weird how they keep running into these self-identifying Democrats. I can thank someone for anything without mentioning my politics, but not these republican-orbiting dems, apparently.
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She seems pretty chill about it. "Well, this is a fine kettle of fis-glblrrmlmlm!"
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Hyegon or Dragena?
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So, just to be clear, this guy is saying that at maximum, he'll be useful no more than twice in your entire relationship?
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Absolutely, I will bow my head and say a mournful prayer for the bravery and fortitude shown by the dirt that has to cover his rotting carcass.
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Oh I know, I just think that it would be equally unsettling to be an adventuring party in dark woods, and instead of mad cackles, you hear a chorus of "Tee-hee!"
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And in Heroforge, Gnolls are called Giggle Dogs XD
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It is interesting to see fantasy creatures through the lenses of other cultures... until you realize English versions are waaaaaay watered down.
"Troll gets owie from goats" vs. "Grenshfagen the night troll will rip your leg off and beat you to death with it because you laughed at the fishmonger."
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Think of all the talented people who OD. Elon just gets painful piss. Shame.
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But I hardly know her!
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"I was nice, but she still refused me?? How is that possible?!"
-an excerpt from the groundbreaking documentary "Everything I know about women, I learned from watching anime."
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More realistic than the actual photo.
"Let the target expose himself and don't block the photo op. Just like we learned at Quantico."
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"Are we great again, Papa?"
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Eeeeeeeveryone complaining about that is a prick who leaves the pump running while they go inside to spend ten minutes agonizing over which scratcher they're gonna buy.
It says stay with your vehicle, people. We have better shit to do than clean fuel spills.
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I can imagine his supporters saying "We votes for this!" Possibly followed up by a "HuRrRrR!" Or maybe a "Sloth love Chunk!"
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I'll still press the heart button... assuming BS puts it somewhere in my feed.
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Didn't Trump also give bombs to Israel?
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"I don't think he's gonna stage another assassination today, might as well leave and beat the traffic."
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Considering we proved he was a rapist, tax cheat, fraudster, silencer, and owner of nearly 40 convictions but still let him run because we didn't want to be mean? My guess is we'd do nothing again... maybe a Dem representative would try another flaccid impeachment for votes, but that's it.
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I heard something similar, "If a man loves a whore, he tries to make her a saint in public. If he loves a saint, he tries to make her a whore in private."
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That reminded me of the original night of the living dead. No matter what direction they were leaving a room, they always entered forward towards the camera in the next shot. Very disorienting.