stoatamatic.bsky.social
converting measurements to stoats for March Mammal Madness! run by @deathbymustelid.bsky.social, avatar by @oddangel.bsky.social, banner by @mcmarmot.bsky.social
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I think you are underestimating the length of a stoat! The best answer I could find online was 45cm, which is quite an impressive schlong, but still only comes out to 1.32 stoatlengths #StoatsAsMeasurement #MMMAfterDark
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The respective proportions on a stoat are probably 20, 75, and 5 (at least, when the legs are not fully extended and are counted with the main body) #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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The tapir had a length of ~7 stoats and a weight of over 2000 stoats! It's a funny metric that produces small numbers in one category and large ones in another, particularly with large animals like seals that tend to be round and dense #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM bsky.app/profile/stoa...
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5.88 stoatlengths, same weight #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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4.41 stoatlengths, and a weight of 455 stoats #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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yeah I had to break out the kilostoats on that one
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47.4 stoats #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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53.6 stoats #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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Those northern weasels are the right colors for this Tuxedo Style division, but it doesn't really count as a "tuxedo" if you wear black shoes with a white linen suit. Besides, these tuxedoed animals are dressed to stand out, whereas stoats molt to white to blend in! #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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Stoats molt twice as frequently! They are famous for molting to white (save for the black tail tip) in the winter, but even the ones at more southerly latitudes that stay brown all year molt just the same. The winter pelage may not be a different color but it is thicker and warmer! #2025MMM
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8.06 stoatlengths! The narwhal didn't need it this time but he could make his tusk more intimidating by letting 8 stoats ride on it #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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9.09 stoats #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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Weight: 3.80 kilostoats
Height: 6.80 stoats
Horn width: 3.82 stoatlengths
#StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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*correction: 7.35 stoatlengths! A tapir is also as long as 10 stoats are *high*. The standard stoatlength includes its 9cm tail! #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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2.21 stoatlengths, and a weight of 9.55 stoats #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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10 stoatlengths, and a weight of 2.45 kilostoats! #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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For comparison: Stoats consume at least a quarter of their body weight (up to a third in captivity; probably higher in the wild but also probably not as high as 50%) to maintain their hyper-noodle metabolism, and eat 5-10 times a day #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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Depends on if the dachshund is its regular size or dinosaur sized! And the reason modern land mammals don't ever evolve to be as huge as dinosaurs is that 1 stoat is the perfect size and evolution recognizes this
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0.0682 stoats #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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Clocking in at a whopping 180 lbs (364 stoats) and 7.2 feet (6.5 stoats) long, the Starry Sturgeon is a real aquatic heavyweight. Maxing out at 29 years old, these fish are also older and wiser, making for a powerful combatant (Bakhshalizadeh et al., 2012). #2025MMM
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Don't be deceived! Even though Tuatara look like lizards, they are in fact the only living member of the order Rhynchocephalia, which means "beak head"! The name Tuatara comes from a Māori word meaning "peaks or spikes on the back." This reptile tips the scales at 2.2 lbs (4.5 stoats) #2025MMM
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6.18 stoats, which also trot on squat legs #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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103 stoats #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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or 1.6*10^-4 to keep it consistent
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146 stoat-heights vs 160 microstoat-heights #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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4.93 stoatlengths, 557 stoatweights #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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Clocking in at 6.6ft (5.92 stoats) in length, the Frilled Shark is an eel-like shark found near the ocean floor in the Atlantic and Pacific, named for its six pairs of wavy gill slits. This shark's most striking feature is its curved, needle-sharp teeth (300 in total!). (Garman, 1884). #2025MMM
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I convert measurements that appear in the narration! I don't know the size of a cyanobacteria. I only know the size of a stoat
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8.82 stoatlengths #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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723 stoats #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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Native to South America, the Woolly Giant Rat has coarse, dense, dark gray fur, short limbs, & long, powerful claws. "Giant" in this case is a relative term, as the Woolly Giant Rat has a top weight of approx. 1.3lb (2.75 stoats). #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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Saiga are a small antelope: 31.5in (~3.2 stoats) tall at the shoulder & 99lb (~200 stoats). Although small in body, they have a lot of face! The fictional Toydarians from Star Wars share this nosable, I mean NOTEABLE, feature. Males have horns up to 16in long. #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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that's a difference of 6.19 stoatweights and 0.15 stoatlengths (this discrepancy is due to stoats being long & not weighing very much) #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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here's the best I can offer for now: marckissel.shinyapps.io/Stoat/
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3.64 stoats #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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182 stoats #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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if I could hazard a guess, armadillos are less than 1% of occurence in a stoat's diet #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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0.16 stoats! #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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8.18 stoats #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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3.6 stoats high, and a weight of 105 stoats #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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A stoat knows very well that size isn't everything, and a lot can be accomplished with the right attitude! That said, heft is certainly helpful #2025MMM
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nearly 61 stoats high! #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM
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that's a glide distance of 53.8 stoatlengths #StoatsAsMeasurement #2025MMM