xinicit.bsky.social - Profile | ThreadSky | a Reddit-style client for Bluesky

xinicit.bsky.social

Sobriety Date 12/22/09. Buddhish. Vulgar, but trying to be clever. ADHD. Recent Posts https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:zzjoncowxyg6a4dqfkvnpi2k/feed/aaalgnvduqvmc Best Posts https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:zzjoncowxyg6a4dqfkvnpi2k/feed/aaaepbpvxlzxw

6,621 posts 10,213 followers 1,134 following

Posts 40 Comments 10

once I get to 20k followers the sacrifices can begin

submitted 3 hours ago • 12 comments

before it got co-opted, M/AGA used to stand for Make Athe Green m&m slutty Again

submitted 2 hours ago • 2 comments

If you’re ugly, people assume you’re into weird shit and won’t date you. If you’re attractive, people date you with the hopes that you’re into weird shit.

submitted 2 hours ago • 6 comments

‘A spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down,’ Mary said under her breath. She put the pipe to her lip, inhaled, and relaxed. A lung full of flowers helped pass the hours. Soon it would be time to ride her umbrella away. It would be nice to see the Alps. For now, she let the smoke take her.

submitted 5 hours ago • 2 comments

- What's wrong with the BMW? - I brought it in because it's making a weird little noise. - That's the blinker. - The what?

submitted 4 days ago • 4 comments

“Based on a true story” means it happened more or less like this, but with ugly people.

submitted 81 days ago • 0 comments

Friend: I know you're hurting right now, but the best revenge is a life well lived. Me: [Looking around at the crumbling hellscape I've created] what's the second best revenge

submitted 23 hours ago • 0 comments

I remember being intimidated by ppl with larger followings than me on twitter every single one of them have been insanely kind, supportive, & encouraging. i got lucky there and here that genuine ppl knew i was genuine anyway, online friendships are real. good ppl exist. always support the arts

submitted 19 hours ago • 14 comments

I hope the Pope doesn’t die before appearing on Hot Ones.

submitted 21 hours ago • 5 comments

People will worship a golden calf instead of checking to see if an elderly man might be having some trouble getting down a mountain

submitted 20 hours ago • 1 comment

“On a scale of Judge Judy to a French circus clown who has just taken his first hit of acid and is trying to hold it together while still delighting the audience, how whimsical are you?” “Oh, I’d say I’m a cross between Mary Poppins and a bachelorette party.”

submitted 21 hours ago • 2 comments

Do you think there's an alternative universe where cilantro is the dominant lifeform, and it has a subsection of plants who order food and are like, “Please make sure you don't put any whiny bitches anywhere near my tacos - they taste like soap!”?

submitted 23 hours ago • 7 comments

Panic room? You mean my bedroom??

submitted 22 hours ago • 4 comments

I say I like brick houses for the aesthetic, but it’s secretly because of the security it provides from wolves

submitted 1 day ago • 6 comments

using the cigarette lighter to charge the vape. a bit of the true self exists within the false self

submitted 23 hours ago • 12 comments

new goal set

submitted 23 hours ago • 8 comments

every problem i have would be easily solved if i just had about $30,000 ❤️

submitted 23 hours ago • 2 comments

what I lack in clarity of mind I make up for in something something whatever

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

*sees woman grabbing her throat while choking on popcorn in the theater. I rush up behind her "SHUUUUUUSH"

submitted 23 hours ago • 10 comments

Man Cold: Day ?? The cough has subsided due to sheer will power. Unfortunately that means my head is now leaking uncontrollably. Butt cheeks are molting. I no longer fear the sweet embrace of death.

submitted 23 hours ago • 1 comment

YOU CAN'T EVER GO HOME AGAIN. THEY HAVE LET OUT YOUR ROOM TO A PACK OF UNICYCLISTS.

submitted 1 day ago • 2 comments

has been awake for a couple hours looks around Ok, well, should probably go take a nap

submitted 1 day ago • 7 comments

My daughter is having her birthday party at a trampoline place today so I'll either come back with a spine injury or the bird flu. Hopefully both 🤞

submitted 1 day ago • 41 comments

I’m so bad at flirting that I’ve become really good at making new friends

submitted 1 day ago • 2 comments

A park ranger got a call about a bear that was acting odd. He went out, found the bear, and approached it. “What’s going on?” he asked. “Disco disco,” said the bear. “What?” “Disco disco.” Just then, the radio squawked. “What’s going on?” “I don’t know,” said the ranger, “but this bears repeating.”

submitted 1 day ago • 7 comments

I’ve only used #2 pencils. There has to be at least one other kind I haven’t tried.

submitted 1 day ago • 5 comments

fog rolls in oh shit, my ride is here. gg

submitted 1 day ago • 2 comments

ahh yes the autistic urge to know WHY

submitted 1 day ago • 21 comments

Know how I know vaccines don’t cause autism? ‘Cuz, if they did, we’d have generations of empathic folks intolerant of injustice and cats would be everywhere and we wouldn’t be dealing with this shit.

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

If you fill a kaleidoscope with cum you can call it a jism prism

submitted 6 days ago • 2 comments

naming this breakdown, "why is the cake salty, because you're crying in it"

submitted 2 days ago • 4 comments

just hanging out with the cats... we're playing a fun game where they very slowly knock things onto the floor, then i pick them up! i should put them out in the snow, just for a second... 😉🫶

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

Girl, are you the continuity setting on a multimeter? Because when we make a connection, I get a buzz

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Be malleable, like squishy clay. Ewww, Gerald. Not like that. Jesus.

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

brevity is the

submitted 1 day ago • 3 comments

What's your sign?

submitted 1 day ago • 2 comments

The thing that makes me laugh the most is probably humor

submitted 2 days ago • 14 comments

shakespeare taught us that bantering wit can manifest true love so you should totally up your shitpost game if you ever want to win her over, drink a poison and then stab yourself with a dagger. show some commitment ffs.

submitted 1 day ago • 2 comments

You wait to see 'truth'. Decades later, you see it. You were always good.

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

There’s nothing wrong with being squishy. People like squishy. Nobody is buying turgidmallows.

submitted 1 day ago • 8 comments