87% Of Loud Crashing Noises Are Nothing, Report Top Experts From Other Room theonion.com/87-of-l... - ThreadSky

theonion.com • 3 days ago

87% Of Loud Crashing Noises Are Nothing, Report Top Experts From Other Room
https://theonion.com/87-of-loud-crashing-noises-are-nothing-report-top-exp-1819579684/

Comments

m40dotcom.bsky.social•3 days ago

Can report that it’s actually the norm when it’s this cold out that houses, flooring and exterior may shift and may odd sounds.

aj-40.bsky.social•3 days ago

The high being 3 did me in. I thought -12 was wind chill. I'm just gonna say that's definitely not for me! Whooo 🥶

m40dotcom.bsky.social•3 days ago

Hey, at least it’s sunny!

The forecasted high was -1, so we outperformed it.

iabacon.bsky.social•3 days ago

The other 13% is a cat.

ladyjadyn.bsky.social•3 days ago

Thanks I can always count on you to ameliorate my auditory hallucinations.

katznjazz.bsky.social•3 days ago

😁

cwsam.bsky.social•3 days ago

or the cat

superknitural.bsky.social•3 days ago

As my mom would've said, "It was that 'Not Me' kid."

jrhanlon.bsky.social•3 days ago

noclues.bsky.social•3 days ago

Not the cat. The cat needs no expert and no artifices of good appearance. The Cat would stroll out. Say, "So what?", and expect you to go clean.

professorbenkenobi.bsky.social•3 days ago

Nothing to see hear

macksteele.bsky.social•3 days ago

The Onion hits the exact need every darn time.

worldswerth.bsky.social•3 days ago

13% are Laurel and Hardy moving a piano

winniebini.bsky.social•3 days ago

Not if you have cats…

tangowhiskey1976.bsky.social•3 days ago

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

008zulu.bsky.social•3 days ago

Human: Why did you break that?!
Cat: Because I want attention!
Human: Then come here so I can pet you!
Cat: DON'T TOUCH ME!!!

olenatheshroomlady.bsky.social•3 days ago

It's a ghost, I know, I've seen it before. And it wears shirt with Amazon logo.

multithinker.bsky.social•3 days ago

The other 13%? Cat revenge missions, gravity experiments, or the universe reminding you it’s never truly ‘nothing.’ What’s your wildest ‘crash from the other room’ story?

medwoman83.bsky.social•2 days ago

The sound heard by my partner, sleeping in the other room when my cat presented me with a live rat in my bed while I was also sleeping.

drake-magnum.bsky.social•3 days ago

Not a crash but a low thud in my case. We had two home brew beers given to us as gifts. We don't drink beer so they remained in our cabinet. One warm day the tops of the cans literally blew off at the same moment. It took me a long while to find the source of the thud, and longer to clean up.