Son-Of-A-Bitch Mouse Solves Maze Researchers Spent Months Building theonion.com/son-of-... - ThreadSky

theonion.com • 2 days ago

Son-Of-A-Bitch Mouse Solves Maze Researchers Spent Months Building
https://theonion.com/son-of-a-bitch-mouse-solves-maze-researchers-spent-mont-1819569765/

Comments

rheuphus.bsky.social•1 day ago

and .. as a reward, they give the mouse CANCER

basiden.bsky.social•2 days ago

For a science fair I built a giant cardboard maze to test my cat's problem solving abilities. Took me days. Before I was even ready to time them, my damn cat zipped through it like it was nothing. I believe that is when I learned about falsifying evidence.

msbak.bsky.social•2 days ago

😆

doctorpaperwaste.bsky.social•2 days ago

"Son of a bitch"

"Mouse"

What the fuck happened in that lab?!

99montez34.bsky.social•2 days ago

Maybe they should have had the mouse build the maze.

reneetaylor.bsky.social•1 day ago

And had a human walk thru it! 🤣

karlkovacs.bsky.social•2 days ago

I don’t follow The Onion for satire. I follow it because the real news is too bleak—just endless hate, death, and doom. At least when The Onion writes about democracy collapsing, it’s supposed to be a joke.

mybougieshoes.bsky.social•1 day ago

Mouse 2028

eks08.bsky.social•2 days ago

This is a NYT article, looks more like one of yours 😂😂

schaplowski.bsky.social•2 days ago

How real is this. Crab

aposthumousmemoir.bsky.social•1 day ago

This is why I like our guinea pigs. Dumb as rocks.

karpovsmachine.bsky.social•2 days ago

Ethologists who work with mice and rats WILL generally tell you that there's always that one son-of-a-bitch outlier that's either much more brilliant or much less motivated than the others. And it'll be consistently the same MFer.

vicario.bsky.social•1 day ago

I know him personally. He is NO ordinary Son-Of-A-Bitch.

didntcmecumin69.bsky.social•2 days ago

The mouse is smarter than the currant administration.

happymyotis.bsky.social•2 days ago

💙🐁

gabepuratekuta.bsky.social•2 days ago

More death traps!

fatbaldboomer.bsky.social•1 day ago

https://youtu.be/5EDKRGkgLsI?si=OIqj5h6POYyN1_TS&t=1979

calpain.bsky.social•2 days ago

That Son-Of-A-Bitch

csweirich.bsky.social•2 days ago

That asshole

nulliusnverba.bsky.social•2 days ago

I just like sayin' Son-Of-A-Bitch Mouse.

There. I just said it again. In the style of Gene Hackman.

"Son-Of-A-Bitch Mouse!"

micahcf.bsky.social•2 days ago

I heard Gene Hackman. Any more news about what happened down there?!?

hiresx.bsky.social•2 days ago

She also was found to be conducting her own study.

shiihs.bsky.social•1 day ago

And it didn't even wear a suit!!!!! Shameless I tell you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

labriction.bsky.social•2 days ago

next thing son of a bitch mouse becomes a populat icon for an animation company

guy8q.bsky.social•1 day ago

Don't talk about ninja mice, the damn rodent skips all the traps, and the poison bait makes it hyperactive. The new generation mice are super mice I tell you.

eheart.bsky.social•2 days ago

I had a pet mouse. She was smarter than my dog. 🤣

trashj.bsky.social•2 days ago

kinda makes me feel awful they use mice so much in labs…

homenow3.bsky.social•1 day ago

😂😂😂😂

notdontrmp.bsky.social•2 days ago

DISGRACEFUL! Months of hard work, thousands in grant money, and this little rodent just waltzes through like he owns the place. NO RESPECT for the scientific process! Probably funded by Big Cheese. SOMEONE HOLD THIS MOUSE ACCOUNTABLE!

derpsnazzy.bsky.social•1 day ago

gud mousie uwu

nothinggoodhappens.bsky.social•2 days ago

That rat bastard!

bipolarlife-uk.bsky.social•1 day ago

atticusthraxx.bsky.social•1 day ago

Fuck mice. Way overrated.

wonk3y.bsky.social•2 days ago

I just got a vertical mouse to pre-empt potential future RSI in my wrist.

Not all mice are assholes out to cause us pain, guys.

#NiceMice

ileanadvasquez.bsky.social•1 day ago

😆😆✊

sdvibe.bsky.social•2 days ago

Time to rewatch Mousehunt, because everyone needs a bit of levity these days. 🐭

xuxi-liakim.bsky.social•1 day ago

The onion seems more tame than reality atm X"D

vladdtime.bsky.social•2 days ago

Nice to get a laugh occasionally. :)

lalarium.bsky.social•2 days ago

Wait till they start using AI.

sasquatchpatch.bsky.social•1 day ago

That last line 😓
See where being smart got it? Compromised hippocampus, courtesy of asshole scientists.

scotsandlit.bsky.social•2 days ago

😂😂

chelleluna.bsky.social•2 days ago

Wasn’t there a true story about a rat #42 that pissed off Harvard researchers because he messed up an obesity study or something? Or was that The Onion also.

therealsnowmiser.bsky.social•2 days ago

The final line is so good

froedb.bsky.social•2 days ago

capitalismhater.bsky.social•1 day ago

The rat bastard

actualdanmccormack.bsky.social•2 days ago

The Onion is helping keep me afloat. Thanks The Onion.

actualdanmccormack.bsky.social•2 days ago

Can I write you an article about a satirical newspaper giving life meaning for a middle-aged local man? "While 20 years ago he couldn't wait for the print copy of The Onion to show itself in the Minneapolis skyways, he now refreshes multiple socials far too often for a man with responsibilities."