13. And the man spake unto Jesus, saying "Get away from me, do not cure my leprosy, thou art untested and implant trackers for the Romans"
14. Jesus replied, "It is a gift from my father, to keep you safe and healthy"
15. The man then said "Libtard asshole" and punched Jesus.
As an ex Christian it really makes me feel good seeing people reclaiming Jesus as the socialist he actually was. I’ve always felt there was a huge disconnect between Christians and Jesus’s teachings. I guess it doesn’t feel like a stretch these days but I struggled with that for years
Agreed. I took Jesus’ actions seriously as a kid and was very attracted to helping the poor. I became an atheist but continued working in homeless services for 20 years. My “christian” megachurch maga mother hates that I help undeserving bums get socialist housing. I am more Christian than her
Wait this is me but I haven’t taken the step to declare myself an atheist lol As a kid I always wondered why my parents words and actions didn’t line up with the Bible 🥴
Do you still go to church while atheist? I did that for a while. I was afraid of people retaliating because I had heard people say what they would do to atheists. I went every week without telling anyone I was atheist. Meanwhile my supposedly devout mother slept in every Sunday
My parents stopped attending long before this because they couldn’t find a church they liked (preacher yelled too much, too much socializing, etc) and I didn’t drive at the time so haven’t bothered for like 5 years. Still watch some Youtube stuff occasionally tho
It’s a long complicated tail but mostly it boils down to I started to realize that more than anything religion is a tool welded by people to control large populations. Christianity as a religion today with its current Bible is a curated version of hand picked ancient text. The Bible just isn’t true.
Back in the 80s, I got banned from bible study for claiming that Jesus would be a communist. My youthful self didn't really understand the difference between it and Socialism.
Still, much closer to Communism than neo-fascism.
Wish I'd thought of that argument much earlier.
Communism as its intended wouldn’t really be bad, it’s just that every “communist” nation to ever exist was actually just authoritarian / fascist, lying about being communist. Americans are just scared of Russia. They shouldn’t have kicked you out that’s wild
Yeah the U.S. has on multiple occasions orchestrated coups against democratically elected leftist foreign leaders and replaced them with basically dictators
Kinda sad that the USA have a Christien-Tallban! Freaky too I was raised Roman (agnostic now). Alter boy for three year's I was lucky the priest was not a bad guy. Anyway I lost my thought have a wonderful day-night.
I tried using lepers to get thru to anti-mask people during COVID. They'd say god would protect them. But the bible plainly says they were kept apart & anyone approaching them covered their face. They said I was wrong. Mostly because the truth didn't fit their theory.
My brother in law died due to his anti-vax, anti-mask beliefs. He had heart problems before Covid came along. Their church told them God would protect his children (seems like masks and vaccines are a route he might have chosen, but I guess not) so they had no need to worry --
Sorry about your BIL. I got AIDS at a hospital in 1984. (didn't find out till 94) I've been told that I'm just "not praying hard enough" to get cured. Not how it works, Brutus.
I have hyperosmia, so certain smells make me physically ill. I had to move one Sunday when another member of the choir sat down in front of me smelling like she marinated in cheap Avon cologne. She told me if I had enough faith it wouldn't make me sick. My response to her was less than kind.
I was always taught you pray for strength to get thru the latest shit-storm he sent you way. Not ask for things. There was a cult here in OH. 90s. Found in ER lane hwy. Praying around the car for gas & diapers for baby. Seemed to think they'd show up. God's not a convenience store. Jeez
Heard similar stories in my town. people told their families on their deathbed that they regretted not wearing a mask. Nurses said patients would fight putting the tubes in because they were in denial that it was happening to them. Not a liberal hoax when you can’t breathe
Don't get me wrong -- I mourned the life of every patient I lost over my nursing career.....even the mean ones. Still, there are consequences for deliberate stupidity and ignorance. The evidence was there. They chose to deny it. It's like a patient with lung cancer sneaking out for a smoke.
I know of a doctor who went outside to tell a patient's antimask, antivax family he had died -- they weren't allowed in the hospital because they refused to put on a mask. One of the men in the family punched him so hard in the face he fell and hit his head in the parking lot. THIS is Republicanism.
Wow that is really infuriating. So many people have decided it’s ok to be aggressive. I really hope there is a swing toward civility when all this runs its course
My faith is hanging by less than a thread at this point thanks to everything I've learned since I left in 2016 rather than go along with the Evangelical crowd and support a man I knew was unqualified and had no business being president. I was lied to for 48 years, and I'm not happy about it.
The bible also says to follow the direction of your nation's leaders, as none are in power except by 'gods divine will - but that didn't apply to masking, I guess? (but imma'bettin'it'll come up as soon as #TFG makes some abhorrent proclamation)
And Jesus said: Not a damn thing coz he never existed in the first place. Morality should never be based on theological mythology, and we absolutely need to stop humoring religious text to guide reality.
American Jesus kicks cripples.
America Jesus takes the 7 loaves of bread and 2 fish, and fucks off home with them.
American Jesus fucking loves guns and money
Jesus literally looks like some Scottish fella in this painting? It's so delusional. Some say Jesus may of had a Scottish accent, there is zero evidence to suggest otherwise, so you never know?
Yeshua was a political activist who challenged his government/religion for the betterment of the people. He understood that the 1% was the true problem. If he was alive today you dumb fucks would kill him all over again.
Not really tryna argue about anything, mostly since for the most part the Bible’s consisting of Semites, but then what does that make of the Greeks and Romans featured in the Bible??
Well dang, okay. Look, at the very least if you don’t believe in it, you don’t have to act like a Reddit-atheist about it. The hostility’s just unnecessary man.
Well if you really were indifferent about it, then I can’t really see how your response conveyed that indifference, it just sounded more like “Ah yes, once again I’ve totally owned the religious sheep with facts and logic!!” Indifference would simply be ignoring the post dude.
Yeah you got a pretty good point there with race being a social construct, at least within the American lense. After all if the world operated that way, you’d think that the ancient Europeans like the Anglos and Franks and Africans like the Hutu and Tutsi wouldn’t fight because “Hey, we’re the same”
Hmm, I mean considering that they’re of Mediterranean origin, as well as tanning easily, I guess that makes sense. Although I do know that there certainly aren’t any Western Europeans present in the Bible, that I’m quite sure of, maybe the closest to that being Armenians who are mentioned a bit
And that's an exact quote from Fuckallofyousguys 3:14. I think. I'm not really up on Bible verses. I just like the pretty lights and fake good-will for a month.
Hmm, Jesus said no such thing. He was too busy picking crops in the fields for next to nothing in pay with no bathroom or drink breaks on a blistering hot day.
He was not. He was working the crowds and feeding off the fear with stories and a collection plate, like all the other "profits" before him and all those that have followed.
Religion is the oldest profession, not prostitution.😏
It's been 1,954 years since the gospel of mark was written, by a primitive who didn't know where the sun went at night. If appealing to the authority of the mythical figure depicted therein was going to work, it would have by now.
Let me guess the new new no empathy MAGA testament of the Bible. Wonder how many times they will have to try rewrite it thats big group of individuals. Yikes can’t wait for what the evangelist will want included in it. 20 Private plane for me and the Devils crowded backbone plane for thee.
You obviously have been to my mother's church. Their current hot-button social issue is who qualifies for free valet parking. Is it based on age or donations.
and the leper said "why do I have to quarantine just cause I got this terrible disease that I may pass on to others? Not fair. I have a right to go where I like and if that spreads a terrible disease, get over it."
Nah...we celebrate Christmas because his mom duped everyone into believing that "virgin pregnancy" story (stop sniggering, Joseph...you are not Jesus' dad).
Good for her that gynecology was rather non-existent over 2000 years ago.
It's more twisted than many realize. They use the alternate definition of "Christianity," that being "Whatever feeds my hate and bigotry most conveniently at the time."
So asking them not to be hateful and bigoted in spite of their stupidity, is a violation of their "constitutional rights".
its funny how people twist the words of their own prophets to aid their own lusts- especially for power. Amazing considering you weren't even ALLOWED to read the Bible for centuries. I guess it takes a long time to twist into a shape that will aid your hatred of women and "others"
yep. Jesus was a revolutionary. These people took out his fangs and his power so they could make Jesus their handmaiden in hate. It is shameful and disgusting. Ill stay a pagan-respecter of jesus
They have the sanitised one.
Where greed is good,
Anything about sharing is erased. " And the good Sarmatian is stoned to death for being a liberal freak.
Being rich is a sign god loves you and hates the poor.
Jesus would be neither Democrat nor Republican. When Christ returns, it will be as King. One thing I know though is he'd be disgusted by some things Republicans do, but more disgusted by some of the things Democrats do.
Let us focus on the now. T&M R destroying America by dismantling Democracy. They R hurting CHRISTIANS and non Christians they are anti CHRIST agents; love money, not people. Mixing apple and oranges don't cut it. The Dems have had their dark past, but today, they continue to be for the people.
As Moses led the refugees across the Red Sea, MAGA God sent a huge tridal wave to drown them all.
He never thought Moses would be turned by Satan and become a people trafficker.
Imagine of the Bible told a different tale where Jesus listened to Satan and had the time of his life and when he was asked to die for sins he said fuck that and kept on partying. That's basically what the evangelicals did when they voted for Trump
Oh, just wait. Trump will rewrite the Bible just like many despots before him did. An age befitting their "anti-christ" is coming, and we are witnessing the reveal of the oldest con in recorded history, that the devil never existed and they were the evil all along.
My favorite graffito ever:
Jesus asked "Who do you say that I am?"
The people replied "You are the eschatological manifestation of the ground of our inner being. The kerygma of which our interpersonal relationships are made."
And Jesus said "What?"
Right the irony of people who think that Jesus didn’t teach us to love our neighbors, to welcome the immigrant. It makes me sad the world has come to this way of thinking, we are better than this.
“Xtians” care not one whit what the historical Jesus said/did. Their xtianity is entirely mythological & divorced from the *good news* of the New Testament. It’s a this-worldly superstition & a Trojan🐎 for ruthlessly capitalistic violent white nationalism. We can’t shame them into being good xtians.
The only modern political ideology that aligns itself closely enough is socialism. Capitalist neo-liberalism doesn't even come close, not even social democracy.
FORCED BIRTH
Wealth transfer to the rich
Inequality
Authoritarianism
Voter Suppression
CUT MEDICARE
Terrorism
Insurrection
GUN VIOLENCE
END SOCIAL SECURITY
Dirty Air and Water
Destroying Planet
Pandemics
RACISM
Misogyny
War
Theocracy
NO PLATFORM
..DEAD PARTY...#GOPDead
I can get behind this one. My question lately to the magats have been the real Jesus or republican Jesus? They always get so frustrated and angry with this question. 💙
And the lord spake unto them saying, "Chill thine bretheren. Thou hast verily approached the dawning of thine salvation from afflictions which ail thee. Hast thee thine insurance information?"
Comments
14. Jesus replied, "It is a gift from my father, to keep you safe and healthy"
15. The man then said "Libtard asshole" and punched Jesus.
Still, much closer to Communism than neo-fascism.
Wish I'd thought of that argument much earlier.
Oops.
TBH, I wasn't heartbroken when they continued to loudly deny the existence of the virus. They got what they paid for. Stupidity has a price.
I followed you.
It's giving Satan tempting Jesus in the wilderness. ‘Do not put the Lord your God to the test.’
I believe God sent us medical professionals, vaccines, masks, and all that jazz. The biggest hurdle for my faith is the way so many Christians act.
America Jesus takes the 7 loaves of bread and 2 fish, and fucks off home with them.
American Jesus fucking loves guns and money
Archeologists found the hidden psalms in Trump's bathroom
Not this shit again”
Would make this perfect
Religion is the oldest profession, not prostitution.😏
And unlike prostitution that delivers joy (at least to johns), religion is joyless.
many people died needlessly
Jesus sings as he walks away
Good for her that gynecology was rather non-existent over 2000 years ago.
So asking them not to be hateful and bigoted in spite of their stupidity, is a violation of their "constitutional rights".
Where greed is good,
Anything about sharing is erased. " And the good Sarmatian is stoned to death for being a liberal freak.
Being rich is a sign god loves you and hates the poor.
JESUS CHRIST FULL OF GRACE AND TRUTH. John 1:14
HE does not operate as a human. He IS GOD.
Many books in Trump Bible rejected by The Council of Nicaea.
Such as:
Book of The Deal, Book of Elon, Lamentations of Melania and others.
He never thought Moses would be turned by Satan and become a people trafficker.
Those infected burned in a rainbow light as their souls were driven into the ground and sent to Lefty hell.
Donnie Trump himself had descended from the great Noah after he had an affair with one of the pigs on his Ark.
🤭
Jesus asked "Who do you say that I am?"
The people replied "You are the eschatological manifestation of the ground of our inner being. The kerygma of which our interpersonal relationships are made."
And Jesus said "What?"
GOP Jesus
#christianNationalism
is just neo-nazism with a cross instead of a swastikkka !!!
Wealth transfer to the rich
Inequality
Authoritarianism
Voter Suppression
CUT MEDICARE
Terrorism
Insurrection
GUN VIOLENCE
END SOCIAL SECURITY
Dirty Air and Water
Destroying Planet
Pandemics
RACISM
Misogyny
War
Theocracy
NO PLATFORM
..DEAD PARTY...#GOPDead
before you say its not debt check every bill what does it say?
debt both public and private
it is 2024 . Get with the times .
Or branding, maybe, like those really happy chickens on a carton of "Organic Free Range" eggs from an operation that's basically a concentration camp
Note - I'm not a Christian, but I do think Jesus was Way Cool
MAGA Jesus: The New, New Testament
MAGA Jesus: The Newest RED Testament (with foreword by Rev. D. Trump)