Report: DOGE staffers energized by potential invasion of Canada because so many of their girlfriends live there. - ThreadSky

chemparrot.bsky.social•12 days ago

They’re all models too

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genxjennifer.bsky.social•12 days ago

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red-liberation.bsky.social•12 days ago

This is a good one

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boboinparadise.bsky.social•12 days ago

A certain Senator, too.

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resisttheorange1.bsky.social•12 days ago

I had them pegged as liking underage Russian girls. My mistake.

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tobybartels.bsky.social•12 days ago

Some of them do. Putin says that if they do him one more favour then she'll be on the next flight, for real this time promise.

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resisttheorange1.bsky.social•12 days ago

Straight to Mara Lago as Trumps guest

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silentbob731.bsky.social•12 days ago

Nah, they're knee-deep in Thai Lady-Boys for certain.

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resisttheorange1.bsky.social•12 days ago

😂🤣😂

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aetheln.bsky.social•12 days ago

They do love being pegged, though

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algoresmilkymams.bsky.social•12 days ago

elon's inefficiency comfortbois having to beatoff matt taibbi for the touch of russian jailbait.

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resisttheorange1.bsky.social•12 days ago

lol

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wordsornumbers.bsky.social•12 days ago

Underage Japanese girls seem more likely.

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resisttheorange1.bsky.social•12 days ago

I stand corrected ☝🏻

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aetheln.bsky.social•12 days ago

Did you know you can buy their panties (used) in vending machines in Japan?

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stevewithaq.bsky.social•12 days ago

True, but fictional Japanese girlfriends are way out of their league. Rumor has it that even the fictional Canadian girlfriends only agreed to date them out of pity.

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resisttheorange1.bsky.social•12 days ago

Canadians are so polite 😇

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aetheln.bsky.social•12 days ago

Plus, how can you handle all 8 tentacles? Maple, please

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blackavar-inle.bsky.social•12 days ago

I do not have a shudder/revulsion emote strong enough for this

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atlfan2415.bsky.social•12 days ago

Bravo sir! 👏👏👏👏👏😂😂😂😂

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marshy65.bsky.social•12 days ago

One of your best

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lrinto.bsky.social•12 days ago

Yeah, good luck with Canadian women, incels

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pollytitian.bsky.social•12 days ago

They aren’t their girlfriends any more.

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robertomitchelli.bsky.social•10 days ago

Trump (with Putin's support) will do to Canada what Russia did to Ukraine

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weareallstardust.bsky.social•12 days ago

F'K the NYT propaganda rag. DOGE "staffers" are felons, make no mistake about that. They are overthrowing our govt which is treason punishable by death!
The "girlfriends" you moron!

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bikster.bsky.social•12 days ago

This is beautiful

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astowell.bsky.social•12 days ago

This is some of your finest work

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chargingrino.bsky.social•12 days ago

This is your best work. And that is saying something, because so much of it is so good.

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bsorohan.bsky.social•12 days ago

Probably met them all at computer camp. Like, last summer.

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watertigernyc.bsky.social•12 days ago

Oh, bravo, sir. BRAVO!!😆😆😆

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steve36893.bsky.social•12 days ago

Classic

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silentbob731.bsky.social•12 days ago

That's actually fairly accurate, since if any of those little sacks of shit ever showed there faces up here they'd get proper fucked.

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lakescountry.bsky.social•11 days ago

Unsubstantiated Canadian Girlfriends 😆

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pcrritesgood.bsky.social•12 days ago

Oh this is an instant classic.

Obscure reference and super accurate.

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phillysean.bsky.social•12 days ago

Georgina, Georgina Glass from Canada.

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luvieh.bsky.social•12 days ago

i had them pegged more as guys who marry virtual dolls...😒

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aetheln.bsky.social•12 days ago

So THAT'S where blow up dolls are made!

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bowser1805.bsky.social•12 days ago

Nice

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1wag.bsky.social•12 days ago

😀

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dantlux.bsky.social•12 days ago

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jennybigcat.bsky.social•12 days ago

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pickersnext.bsky.social•12 days ago

Imaginary Candian women have better taste than that

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deepers.bsky.social•12 days ago

☠️☠️

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bacongrease.bsky.social•12 days ago

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lazy-activist.bsky.social•11 days ago

Think this is my favourite follow on Bsky, no matter how grim each day feels Pitchbot always make me grin 😀

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jpjacobson.bsky.social•12 days ago

you wouldn't know them.

.

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keith-pochick.bsky.social•12 days ago

Trump’s Social Media meltdowns are modern America’s “fireside chats.”

- by Maureen Dowd

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boutonb.bsky.social•12 days ago

Great joke but considering they are imaginary girlfriends, you'd imagine they'd do everything in their power to prevent this.

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mtannenbaum.bsky.social•12 days ago

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mtannenbaum.bsky.social•12 days ago

Does Pope @usdhuga.bsky.social approve?

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usdhuga.bsky.social•12 days ago

This is a certified Angus AAA banger.

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coolhwip.bsky.social•12 days ago

Please put “girlfriends” in quotation marks.

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rjnerddad.bsky.social•12 days ago

That's the joke

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coolhwip.bsky.social•12 days ago

Thanks, I know that.

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rjnerddad.bsky.social•11 days ago

Do you?

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tarheelguy.bsky.social•12 days ago

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styathomedogmom.bsky.social•12 days ago

OMG! I love this one so much. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

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giriwaltz.bsky.social•12 days ago

The girls they met online on Final Fantasy. But never met in person.

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lacurandera.bsky.social•12 days ago

You wouldn’t know her

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butterwise.bsky.social•12 days ago

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rjnerddad.bsky.social•12 days ago

This is amazing. Well played, sir.

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paige9999.bsky.social•12 days ago

I’m pretty sure their girlfriends are all “horny milfs in their area”

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edgeoforever.bsky.social•11 days ago

“Potential girlfriends”🥴

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bogyankee.bsky.social•12 days ago

You wouldn't know her. They met at band camp.

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dannydepratto.bsky.social•12 days ago

Let me tell ya. It's tiring being ten of those girlfriends.

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colinist.bsky.social•12 days ago

All-timer *slow clap*

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gartmartin9.bsky.social•12 days ago

If Joe Biden had done an infomercial on the WH lawn for his biggest donor--we would have had 967 stories condemning it--that is because, unlike Trump, he is not a master at "upending the norms"
https://www.nytimes.com/2025/03/11/us/politics/trump-buy-tesla-elon-musk.html

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leephillips.bsky.social•10 days ago

Lots of ways to take action and run the POS Musk into the ground. #TeslaTakeDown

https://www.betterthanatesla.com

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realcaptainhaddock.bsky.social•12 days ago

👏

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actualry.bsky.social•11 days ago

“Alleged girlfriends”

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monettc.bsky.social•12 days ago

Yeah, Pornhub’s head office is in Canada

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epawar.bsky.social•12 days ago

That's funny!

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dailytaxmemes.bsky.social•11 days ago

Enjoyable skeet 10/10

Would read again

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yellowgreenblue.bsky.social•11 days ago

Even tho I enjoy reading NY Times Pitchbot—& have been wondering if the kids r crying bcuz people r furious at 🟠 & the Boer 🧛🏻’s actions—I swear I almost took this one seriously & hollered “these MFs r straight f*cking crazy 4 real beyond unhinged”. That’s just how surreal this inside coup has been.

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volcanohead.bsky.social•11 days ago

They all met at Niagara falls last summer, and you wouldn't know them.

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massmediaconsum.bsky.social•12 days ago

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themeanprogressive.bsky.social•12 days ago

🤣🤣🤣

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rockybeethoven.bsky.social•11 days ago

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themck.bsky.social•12 days ago

🤣🤣🤣

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ramblon.bsky.social•12 days ago

Damn, I'm not sure what kind of an award you give a skeet, but this one's gotta be nominated

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warmh20penguin.bsky.social•6 days ago

Incredible, no notes

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smrodman.bsky.social•12 days ago

Hey now…they’ve laid lots of times!

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sabocat1829.bsky.social•12 days ago

Marry me, NYT Pitchbot. Marry me and take me away from all... (gestures around vaguely) this.
Comrade Mrs. Sabocat will understand.*

*ᴺᵒᵇᵒᵈʸ ˢᵉⁿᵈ ᵗʰᶦˢ ᵗᵒ ᶜᵒᵐʳᵃᵈᵉ ᴹʳˢ ˢᵃᵇᵒᶜᵃᵗ

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