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crystalosaurus.bsky.social
Screenwriter, baker of treats, petter of dogs, player of video games, reader of books 🧋🍪🧁🎮👩🏻‍💻👻🇲🇽🇺🇸 💖💜💙
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Prolific Poster

It’s too early in the day for me to lose my mind over this man LMAO but I’ll do it anyway!!!

I will make this place the new tumblr so help me god

i am always saying "i am always saying this" because i love to lie

You wanna French kiss? Girl, the tariffs

so diverse the way he’s coming for gamers and drivers

Hands Off Protest in the Boston Common

dick sucking factory closing down bc of tariffs, end of an era 😪

If this was happening in another country they'd call this communism and proof of their lack of freedom

with May being just around the corner and the southeast already suffering from being under-warned in the last week from major tornadoes makes this so ominous i can't even begin to explain People are going to die.

Nintendo naming Trump’s tariffs specifically here rules and I hope starts to radicalize at least a few people. Silly that this could be what does it, but hey it’s America baby. We love our cheap toys more than food or medicine.

Let the switch 2 prices radicalize you

The penguins react to tariffs

I don't like how the world is currently being run by tech bros who had their minds blown by 'god spelled backwards is dog' and never evolved beyond that point

Holding my Nintendo Switch in my arms and telling it that it is always going to be a Super Nintendo Switch to me- no matter what it's official branding ended up being

ACAB includes the uwu police

Update: my bisexual ass now has a save slot for Neve 😅

Newman’s Own stuff rules. Everything is solid quality, the pasta sauce isn’t Rao’s but it’s solidly above Prego, all the ingredients make sense, it goes to charity. This is what rich people should do. Elon is sending his sperm around or some shit and Paul Newman is helping kids from beyond the grave

Unidentified men grabbing someone off the street and putting her in a car because she wrote an op-Ed. This as flatly authoritarian as anything we’ve seen in this country in a very long time.

welp!

Office Space (1999) Dir. Mike Judge 📽️

Me in the national security team group chat

What if tea... could piss? Introducing Kombucha

saying “we told you so” has never felt more joyless

I feel confident in predicting history will judge this decade or so as the absolutely stupidest time in American history. Honestly our kids and grandkids will read about this time and be shocked that adults existed.

I love you all so much 🥹 I wish I had met you under better circumstances. Circumstances other than the genocide. Please, don’t forget us, even if we die. Keep talking about us, how much they tortured us, and how all our children died—burned, buried under rubble, executed, or...🥹🥹 🫂🫂🇮🇱

There are stakes whether or not you participate, organize and act. I’d rather face them standing up.

every person involved in this needs to be in prison

For many Americans, egging cubertrucks is now simply unaffordable

saw someone call Pete Hegseth a "DUI hire" and frankly i must lol

“When they go low, we go high” is dead and I want everyone who did this in hell.

My friend recently (and hilariously) pointed out that Emmrich Volkarin is the first video game romance I’ve been 100% “monogamous” with. In her words: “you love being a video game slut but now you’re a committed woman” 😂😂😂😂 She’s right though 🥴

Tesla Model 3 crushed by an Olmec statue By Mexican sculptor @chavismarmol.bsky.social

fuck off! get absolutely fucked!

fun fact: Julius Caesar's last known words were, "why's everyone acting so fucking weird???"

I recently made another Rook for Veilguard and she is intended for Lucanis but I get the feeling I’m gonna end up saving a slot for Emmrich. Again. Round three. lmaoooooo (and maybe Neve? Idk they had some good vibes together.)

the Patron Saint of reply guys

I love Baltimore

i said a few times here and there before the election that we’ll see what the mass deportation plan looks like when it’s ICE agents dragging grandmothers out of churches and, well, here we are

*Ms. Frizzle, giving directions to the brain* go up the spinal cord, take a sharp left, dendrite

megawealth is a curse! you become acutely aware of the needs you have that cannot be satisfied through material means AND you are socially ill-positioned to be in a place where you can experience authentic human connection because everyone around you has every incentive to lie to you!

David Lynch shot it down from heaven 💫

a fun prank to pull on your neighbor is to plant a sequoia seed in their front yard and then come back 100 years later like hahaha how’d that get there