jakeyapp.bsky.social
Did a thing, probably
114 posts
272 followers
131 following
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I am LITERALLY not here x
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Gosh. I have the dimmest memories of this. And everything else xx
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I loved Unwinding, so much. It was the project I have most wanted to do. It wasn't what it was, but what I knew it could become over time. We just... Didn't get any more. Ha. Never say never and all that. But thank you so much for your encouraging words... I DO have a thing I'm about to launch...
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I have a plan. Really. Soon.
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I regret it is NOT
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Hahaha! Bravo
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Well. I am v v grateful. Thank you!
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Hahahaha
Wow. Please tell me you haven't spent the whole day researching this
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We should swap lists
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Do elaborate
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I did not see that one coming
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But the real point of my hyperbolic ire was to allow listeners to play the fun oh-no-daddy-is-angry pretend game.
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I respect the enthusiastic outlier.
Whilst I do not need to take you through the entire argument, stale, joyless, fatless-feeling cake, crowned by a colourless disc of orange-squash-flavoured phlegm, and given a micron-thick coating of ersatz wartime chocolate is not my idea of a party in my mouth.
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This is all beautiful. And I could suppress a creeping sense of unease over your enthusiasm for desiccated coconut, until you mentioned Jaffa Cakes.
I effectively made about 200 podcasts about why Jaffa Cakes are wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong.
WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU
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Yes. As someone who's had a cough for nearly two months now... Ugh
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This is very problematic
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...
what
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Oh, you can't bring HOME MADE into the equation, I mean COME ON
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Ohhh I miss that so much. I wish they'd commissioned it...
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CONCLUSION
There are so many great vegan biscuits out there. Don't buy Oreos. Happy dunking.
#biscuits #vegan #veganbiscuits
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farmhouse-biscuits.myshopify.com/products/oat...
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Farmhouse Biscuits' incredible Oat Flips.
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Here, then, is the greatest vegan biscuit currently available anywhere in the world:
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It has a nonpareil porosity that will drink your tea or coffee on your behalf, as capillary as a giant redwood, but with the playful jeopardy that so delicate a biscuit will conjure. Do not linger. This biscuit needs you to eat it NOW.
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A gently-blossoming sweetness with a complex aromatic profile that evokes every kind of happy nostalgia - from vanilla ice cream on holiday to the fleeting solace of a school-dinners pudding.
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Long have I pondered. And my conclusion is yes. Yes, it really is that good.
It's an exquisite experience. The lightest texture but with satisfying body. Think of the delicacy of a wafer, backed up with the satisfying bite of a flapjack.
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I cannot remember where I last found this biscuit. Londis? Budgens? Something like that. Also, perhaps, in a garden centre. Places like that.
I have occasionally asked myself: is it its elusiveness that causes me to covet this biscuit so much? Or is it really that good?
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I believe there is, but securing it requires the tenacity and determination of Captain Ahab, as it is not sold in any mainstream supermarket. But it can be found if you are prepared to search.
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5. MOBY DUNK - IN SEARCH OF THE VEGAN GREAT WHITE WHALE
The question, then, presents itself. Is there a biscuit that presides over the rest? Is there a near-perfect vegan biscuit available to purchase in the UK today?
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That was a great biscuit.
But as you can see, there are still many, many options.