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theonion.com • 84 days ago

Comments

mixphx.bsky.social•83 days ago

Me and my knowledge of geography and world affairs blowing the socks off of foreigners at the party

tabuckton.bsky.social•84 days ago

God bless @theonion.com

kornygoatweed.bsky.social•84 days ago

He should team up with one of those people who can push their eyes out of their sockets.

starparticle.bsky.social•84 days ago

Oh Gods, this article is like a warm bubble bath at the end of a really, really shitty day.

blakelikesspiders.bsky.social•84 days ago

Finally the recognition I deserve for being born with rubber bones.

rho2053.bsky.social•84 days ago

Lol. I used to do a party trick called "getting into a broom" that looked really freaky and always got the whole party trying to replicate it

simplytoast.bsky.social•84 days ago

Look at that EDS human go, he'll feel all that in 20 years.
#EDSAwareness
But yeah

maggiewatanabe.bsky.social•84 days ago

I've been feeling it all for 40 years
Hypermobility sucks

ashurablaze.bsky.social•84 days ago

Watch out for the kid who can roll his tongue!

runscreaming.bsky.social•83 days ago

Armed and ready

fratboyamy.bsky.social•84 days ago

I have a hard time shuffling cards bcuz my thumbs bend backwards at the middle joint. 🤟

saramishawn.bsky.social•84 days ago

☠️

deistafterdark.bsky.social•84 days ago

When the headline is enough to make you uncomfortably giddy.👌

Like when someone chases you with a scab and all you can do is flee screeching like panicking harpy.

abbylark.bsky.social•84 days ago

its probably a gal but sure

erodlane.bsky.social•84 days ago

Double-jointed people are the real MVPs of any party. Things winding down? Boom—suddenly everyone’s losing their minds over a guy bending his arms backwards. Greg Thiede didn’t just attend the party, he became the party.

imsmarterthanyou.bsky.social•84 days ago

🤔

hardingfele.bsky.social•83 days ago

I am he. (Kind of)

94044qb.bsky.social•84 days ago

bsorohan.bsky.social•84 days ago

Depending on what kinds of refreshments were available I can see that leading to huge mirth, or a screaming freakout.

yulriddick.bsky.social•84 days ago

Can he jimmy out of a police clutch like T2?

yulriddick.bsky.social•84 days ago

Yeah, but does it get him laid?

zsetley.bsky.social•84 days ago

@ehlersdanlosdaily.bsky.social It’s true though

valadin.bsky.social•84 days ago

I didn't know Jimmy Fallon was double jointed.

captmillennial.bsky.social•84 days ago

Why is @theonion.com posting this? You’re supposed to be satire. This happened at a party I attended on election night.

stevenzurita.bsky.social•84 days ago

Niceeeeeee

jbomb.bsky.social•84 days ago

hey that’s me I’m the guy

justinlsanchez.bsky.social•84 days ago

Best headline I’ve read all year

airnomad1.bsky.social•84 days ago

Does The Onion get to keep infowars or what?
Fucking elon making a play

shugunou.bsky.social•84 days ago

Assuming the court is unbiased, they won't let him do it.

airnomad1.bsky.social•83 days ago

Depends on which district I think

jmamd.bsky.social•84 days ago

It would be nice if the onion could be funny without having to say the F word Lets takes thehigh road

rachelattack.bsky.social•84 days ago

I can wiggle my eyeballs and yet my friend pool remains shallow, tepid. Can I interest you in a third nipple? An ear wave? I can also flare my nostrils. Each trait sings “love me, love me, love me”