Grab your kids hand. I'm a grown ass adult and nothing makes me happier than when my mom kisses me or gives me a hug.
Idk. Been that way since forever. But just because they're grown doesn't mean you stop loving them. They'll always be your baby. And that's a lovely thing.
Even when they are grown and have established their own household we parents still love our children & fall into the patterns of when they were kids. You never know what life will throw at you because one never knows if there is another tomorrow which is why I always say 'I love you' to my family.
Mine is 10, almost 11. She still does this sometimes... and sometimes she is too big and does not... The last time will sneak up on me so gradually that I will not even notice...
Mothers will always be mothers.
In April 2005, my precious mom was in the hospital at UCSF during her last few days of life. There was little she could manage to eat. I told her the cafe across the street sold mango popsicles. One of her favorites. I asked her if she would like to try eating one.
As I turned to leave her room to go out into the typically cold, foggy San Francisco morning to get her popsicle, she asked, "Don't you want to take your jacket?" A question she'd asked me since I was a child. I was 47 at the time.
I have recordings of his voice before puberty hit and changed the soundtrack of my life forever. And an mp4 where he sings Twinkle twinkle little star age 2. If I listen to it, I will sob for days. Tonight we talk for hours about this girl at school who is SO beautiful. Being a parent is letting go.
Oh this must be so wonderful to have. My son is 25 now, he stopped the hugs at 10 (unless he was poorly),would turn his head if we took photos & if we tried to film him, he would protest loudly. He has turned into a wonderful young man,who’ll now give me a hug when I need one & hold my arm if needed
It’s a years-long rollercoaster of demanding space, then needing hugs, but we’re very close. He’s 18, he hurt his ankle in gym, mom rushed over & suddenly there was time while icing the leg for talking about anything. So precious, I know it, almost thanking that slippery gym floor. Proud moms right?
I have 4 sons. Four years ago, we had a 42-inch snowstorm. After four days, my #3 son called to tell me they were picking me up for lunch, and we went downtown. *He* grabbed *my* hand and held me firmly and closely to make sure I had the support. He's my hero. 🥰
One more thing: thank you for explaining. Your first sentence worried me, and I initially wondered if you were a troll. I'm so glad you're not. I hope your holiday season is nothing short of magical and loving. Thanks again. 😊
At 15, I was left with mobility issues from a freak accident. Walking on my own now has me in nearly constant pain. That snowstorm was especially hard, and the slushy, icy streets didn't help. He didn't wait for me to ask. #3 son is especially attentive and caring--and I'm truly blessed.
And sometimes he actually lets me take it. Our kids know when we just need that extra bit of attention to our love of their whole being, from birth to whatever age they are now. I still hold my 91 year old mom’s hand bc I know she loves it. Her memories are of all of me and my life and of love. ♥️.
I hope you did. :) I was just thinking of my mom tonight. On the 26th of December it will be 29 years since I lost her. It still seems like yesterday...
When my oldest son was 7 or 8 years old, we were holdings hands as we walked to school. When we got close I said to him: You know, some day soon you won't hold my hand in front of your friends. He was thoughtful for a moment and then leaned toward me to whisper: Yes, but I'll always want to.💕
That's really beautiful and this, in such simple words, expresses a feeling which is so personal and which people fear to say out loud but cherish with all their heart. I am not a father but somehow it still struck my heart. Thanks for sharing this.
Before childseats, I used to fling out my arm across my young son. He was in a seatbelt, but those weren't that great then either. My son is grown & has his own family, but I still fling my arm across an empty seat.
How to cross the street as a six to seven year old kid in Brooklyn, NY: Wait at the light for an adult. When one appears, say “Hey, Lady? Can you cross me?” With a baby in one arm, & groceries in the other, she says “Hold on to my skirt!” We cross. Love that memory & the ever changing crossing guard
My mother once got angry with me for reaching across to restrain her forward movement *if necessary* one day as I had to slam on my brakes. I was a young mother & use to protecting my children the same way. She saw the action as condescending.
Your post made me smile.
Thank you.
Those words are never useless. When my daughter-in-law drove me home after our feast at their house yesterday, I told her to drive safely. I also tell everyone in my family when they have left my home on the late side, to let me know they got home safely. Not all remember, and I nudge. 😊
My sons always laugh at me because I'm annoying with the constant "Be Careful!"s.
It's all that's left though. I can't protect them anymore. I probably say it more for me than for them.
I am so sorry for your loss. This is surely one of any parent's worst nightmares. Such pain never leaves, but I hope your sweet memories of him will comfort you in time, so you can again feel him in your heart and smile. 🙏💖
I can no longer feel how happiness looks like , moments of misery and sorrow in my life,l feel like committing suicide,l have lost the spirit to hold on anymore😭😭l feel like this is the end of the situation am in. I don’t know what to do l really need someone to talk to ❤️🙏
Please, Anna, hear in your heart what @bigmommalurka.bsky.social said. 20 years ago I had 2 simultaneous cancers and thought I was ready . My surgeon had me fill out a questionnaire and asked what I was afraid of. I wrote, "Dying on the table." That was the moment I knew I wanted to live.
Anna, as long as there is life, there is hope. Remember what I wrote before I went into the OR? A month prior, I'd been diagnosed with *two* simultaneous, unrelated cancers. That was 20 years ago, and I thought I'd lost all hope. "When you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on!"
If you still feel anger or despair and depression, you're still alive. Something or someone somewhere is your reason to live. What you get up to do each day is a purpose. There's value in every breath. Take a deep one and feel the cleanse while exhaling. Call 988 for help. Or 1-800-273-TALK (8255).
dial 988 and call back if you get someone unhelpful. It’s a resource that is meant to be used as often as you need until it helps. Find something creative to pour your thoughts and feelings into. Write about your struggles and when you’re finished burn it. Get your feelings out any way you can
I am not a trained trauma counselor, but I am a mom. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. You have the power within yourself to overcome your situation, should you choose to find it. Please call or text the support hotline. 💜 YOU ARE worth it.
My eight year old son is very interested in being cool but also loves a snuggle on the couch while we're watching TV or playing videogames. I just hope he never outgrows it
A poet's plight, a futile, endless chase,
For meaning's mirage, a phantom's kiss.
A cosmic joke, a tragic, absurd disgrace,
A meaningless existence, a worthless bliss.
A day will come, and you will not know it when it happens, when your parents will hold your hand for the very last time, pick you up for the very last time, and many other similar milestones.
Cherish every moment with your loved ones because you won't know when you are passing such a milestone.
There was a moment - scant - when my then teenaged son instinctively grabbed my hand while we were walking somewhere. And then he caught himself. We laughed. He’s in him 30s now and I think of this often
There was a day when my late dad commented how it was so nice to walk with me and not have to slow his pace.
Then there was a day when he said 'slow down Love'. 💔
My mother reached across to stop her date from flying forward when she stopped too fast
I guess you would have to have grown up without seat belts to understand that
I can’t find the words to describe how reading that makes me feel. 🥺 There are tears free falling down my cheeks. Thank you so much for sharing this. I’ve never read it before. 💜
Reminds me of how sandman hugs and final dens by @robinince.bsky.social makes me feel every time I see it. (Robin, if this isnt ok to share, let me know and I will remove it asap) in fact I just cried as I quickly re-read it before adding it here. And now I'm properly weeping and can't stop.
Wish I’d known the last time my son took my hand to walk or cross the street, would be the last time. I’d have walked more slowly. He’s a young adult at university, and rocking the independent thing, which is the goal, but bittersweet. 💙
Scene: Younger son's spring break during college junior year. Strep throat. I checked on him as I was heading up to my room, and he asked me to stay. I got into bed with him and snuggled a bit, thinking "Yes, this is the last time. I get to know that this is the last time. How luck am I." Tears.
I’m 6’2” & 210 pounds. The last time my tiny mother drove me somewhere, she reflexively reached her arm out to keep me in place when she had to stop suddenly. She was almost 70 and I was 50. I suspect I’ll always do the same for my kids. ❤️
On a day when I've cried and cried for the loss of my wonderful father, the loss no less raw on his 2nd death anniversary, I read this #poetry on a #parent 's #care and say to you defiantly, "I'm not crying. YOU'RE crying!"
I’m in my mid 50s. My dad is in his mid 80s. But yesterday he offered to carry some plates down some stairs for me because he said “they’re very heavy.” 🩷 I just lifted them up and down lightly a few times to show they weren’t too bad.
This happened to me and my son was indeed 9. We were in a large crowd and I think he was nervous. I remember it because a voice in my head told me this was probably the last time ever. And it was. He's 20 now. He'll never hold my hand again. It think about this a lot.
I would hope you have a few more years, my 12 year old always holds my hand. Who knows for how much longer though, she's definitely reached the 'you can drop me off round the corner' phase
Sadly you will remember the time he first refuses to hold your hand. I'll never forget when my little boy first didn't want to hold my hand. Still, he's 35 now and I still get regular hugs from him so all is well. And I have grandchildren who still like to hold my hand. Win, win.
I am at the point where my sons and grandsons reach for my arm whenever we approach a curb or doorway. I helped them when they were small, now they help me because I have RA. I am lucky and proud.
Comments
Idk. Been that way since forever. But just because they're grown doesn't mean you stop loving them. They'll always be your baby. And that's a lovely thing.
I was pleasantly shocked.
It was the last time.
Still etched in memory.
In April 2005, my precious mom was in the hospital at UCSF during her last few days of life. There was little she could manage to eat. I told her the cafe across the street sold mango popsicles. One of her favorites. I asked her if she would like to try eating one.
Mothers will always be mothers.
Of course they should be.
2. I was already commenting and then I saw your icon and it is AMAZING.
And googly eyed wrex is best Wrex
Best I could manage. It's late.
....I should call my mom.
Thank you for sharing 😌
Your post made me smile.
Thank you.
I took all those incidences as a lesson in watching what I said to my children as the years have gone by.
It's all that's left though. I can't protect them anymore. I probably say it more for me than for them.
This isn’t sad. I don’t know what you would get so upset read…oh
Oh son of a bitch.
[memoires take hold as I sink into the Swamp of Sadness like Artex]
“Mom, I’m 22!”
I'm so happy he still grabs my hand when we're walking into a store from the parking lot :D
My son is 9.
May he always want to hold my hand.
For meaning's mirage, a phantom's kiss.
A cosmic joke, a tragic, absurd disgrace,
A meaningless existence, a worthless bliss.
Cherish every moment with your loved ones because you won't know when you are passing such a milestone.
Then there was a day when he said 'slow down Love'. 💔
I guess you would have to have grown up without seat belts to understand that
life is good and also a very very fleeting moment
Thank you.
Or maybe we're both crying...
#missingmyparents #greatparentsareablessing
I knew in the moment that it would be the last time I held my son. I felt him take his last breaths.
It’ll have been five years next month. And it still wrecks me.