Optimist: The cup is half full Pessimist: The cup is half empty Science Fiction Writer: The cup is a crystalline super computer and the liquid is hyperintelligent, they want to know why humanity should be allowed to exist, you have 30 minutes to respond and the answer must be danced by a cat - ThreadSky

scalzi.com • 92 days ago

Optimist: The cup is half full

Pessimist: The cup is half empty

Science Fiction Writer: The cup is a crystalline super computer and the liquid is hyperintelligent, they want to know why humanity should be allowed to exist, you have 30 minutes to respond and the answer must be danced by a cat

Reposted from Chanda Prescod-Weinstein 🌌

Optimist: The cup is half full
Pessimist: The cup is half empty
Cosmologist: The cup is dusty or full of gravitational waves

Comments

ukhuman1st.bsky.social•92 days ago

Optimist: the cup is half full.
Pessimist: the cup is half empty
Schrodinger: the contents of the cup are indeterminate until you look inside it.

jhughesviews.bsky.social•92 days ago

Optimist: The cup is half full.

Pessimist: The cup is half empty.

X user: the world is flat and the jab is DYEING PEOPLE. WEF CHEMTRALLS. Hahahah Trump owned you commie lib. Go cri in your’e save space no sec bathroom. THEIR ARE TO GENDERS. Now make me a sandwhich 🇺🇸 🇺🇸 🇺🇸 🦅🦅🦅🦅🔫 🔫 🔫 🪖 🪖 🪖

mischfin.bsky.social•85 days ago

Thanks for actually making me chuckle. That is unsettlingly accurate.

jhughesviews.bsky.social•85 days ago

You are most welcome! I’ve spent an unhealthy amount of hours in the past four years arguing with these people.

janeg-b.bsky.social•92 days ago

Me? I have a cup.

benjamin-bradley.bsky.social•92 days ago

jaynew.bsky.social•92 days ago

Danced by a cat😄

supermedusa.bsky.social•92 days ago

I can answer in a minute: Humans should continue to exist so we can serve the needs of cats, dancing or otherwise.

laurelmathe.bsky.social•92 days ago

Optimist: The cup is half full

Pessimist: The cup is half empty

Designer: Which message do you want your viewer to see?

macronid.com•92 days ago

Žižek: The cup symbolizes the filling, and the emptying. It's a perversion of the contents, and in this way, is an eternal struggle. Struggle against the happiness and the sorrow. So we see again that it is capitalism that is the topic of discussion. We hate the cup because we hate capitalism.s

macronid.com•92 days ago

Literally critic: But what does the cup say about the human condition?

kevinkitching.bsky.social•92 days ago

Optimist: the glass is half full.

Pessimist: the glass is half empty.

Theoretical Physicist: Given a spherical glass in a vacuum....

renezuo.bsky.social•92 days ago

I drink what's in the cup.

I'm thirsty.

the-jen.bsky.social•92 days ago

wileypaul.bsky.social•92 days ago

Optimist: The cup is half full

Pessimist: The cup is half empty

Schrödinger: The cup is both full and empty, until we look at it

1beelady.bsky.social•92 days ago

Optimist: The cup is half full

Pessimist: The cup is half full

Registered Nurse: Doesn’t matter. I am charting 200cc intake

gwhit8808.bsky.social•92 days ago

jeremytinker.bsky.social•92 days ago

Optimist: the cup is half full.
Pessimist: the cup is half empty.
Peace Corps Volunteer: I could bathe in that.

spacer01.bsky.social•92 days ago

Thirsty engineer setting cup down: it’s what now?

bsky.ltd•92 days ago

Computer Scientist: The cup is an extension of the container object. It exposes three functions; drink, smash, and clean. It's inital state is empty.

fishbulbish.bsky.social•92 days ago

The pessimist sees the water level lowering, and extrapolates a future state from given data. The optimist is pretty sure they have free refills.

shirkskirt.bsky.social•92 days ago

Archaeologist: the cup was made by a Minoan potter in the 18th century BCE and contains some leftover ritual Minoan wine. I wouldn't drink it if I were you.

alacritysshadow.bsky.social•89 days ago

And the pragmatist just drinks the damned thing & gets a refill, wandering off muttering "idjits... Idjits all..."

enlightenededu.bsky.social•89 days ago

There is no cup.

policyjosh.bsky.social•92 days ago

What cup? I just drink from the bottle.

dkbundy.bsky.social•92 days ago

Realist: Give me the cup. I'm thirsty.

librariandad.bsky.social•92 days ago

Well that explains things a bit… I’m sorry but I think you’ve got the wrong cat. Can you try tweaking things? Mine is getting tired.

nancync.bsky.social•92 days ago

How about intelligent “mold?”https://www.publicradioeast.org/2024-11-21/weird-science-the-problem-solving-dog-vomit-slime-mold-and-its-place-in-scandinavian-folklore

demfangrrl.bsky.social•92 days ago

I ❤️ slime mold.

frostfly.bsky.social•92 days ago

I thought the cup was full of yogurt.

gnf585v.bsky.social•92 days ago

Optimist: The cup is half full
Pessimist: The cup is half empty

Me. RC airplane builder. If I stick wings and a motor on the cup, will it fly?

inspiteoftrump.com•92 days ago

Worked for the F16 🤷

rcglenn.bsky.social•51 days ago

The cup is too large.

ldy.bsky.social•92 days ago

Douglas Adams's description of Brownian motion as ersatz power supply was a bizarre form of enlightenment in my early teens.

adlangx.bsky.social•92 days ago

I was going to say that reminds me of the story from LD&R called When the Yogurt Took Over and suggest you watch it. Then I looked it up and found out you flippin WROTE IT. Hahahaha.

One of my favorites btw.

aimeew.bsky.social•92 days ago

Gosh I hope someone’s made an Accelerando reference

(Yes, I’m more about hyper-smart dogs but nonetheless.)

aimeew.bsky.social•92 days ago

Sigh.

[belated . inserted here]

jzbozny.bsky.social•89 days ago

Cat: we’ll just see what’s what shall we? Knocks cup off counter.

Fixed it for you.

drmikewiser.bsky.social•92 days ago

Pedantic scientist: The cup is actually full; gas is a legitimate state of matter. If the top half were vacuum, the liquid would behave very oddly.

astridsdream.bsky.social•92 days ago

https://youtu.be/0EytSWiKrFg?si=Br_cp7XiGOVxmhSy

mayhemmayhap.bsky.social•92 days ago

Pedantic Scientist's research assistant: Also, technically the water is local to the glass, but it's not touching the glass and it will evaporate at an increasing rate...

dnlmsstch.bsky.social•92 days ago

We have bread a dancing cat through domestication - that should be reason enough

mayhemmayhap.bsky.social•92 days ago

I like a nice loaf

oliviaquinn.bsky.social•92 days ago

Im obsessed with the accuracy of ‘the answer must be danced by a cat’ 🤣🤣🤣♥️♥️♥️

scalzi.com•92 days ago

Everything's better with a cat!

maninblack.bsky.social•92 days ago

Cats!

jfree36008.bsky.social•92 days ago

Pissamist - who’s standing between me and the bathroom

thejasongraves.bsky.social•92 days ago

Me: this is water, I ordered a beer.

austenlied.bsky.social•92 days ago

Romance: The cup was cool to the touch, filled with liquid tears. The heavy weight of it was both a comfort and a distraction.

maxblauwzon.bsky.social•92 days ago

The perfect-skeleton-iverse sez it's full of liquid thionite! ;-)

ketanmd.bsky.social•92 days ago

Topologist: the water is full of cup

dfjdejulio.bsky.social•92 days ago

Can it be my cat?

mayhemmayhap.bsky.social•92 days ago

Optimist: Water - we're saved

Pessimist: That's not enough water for all of us

The Cosmos: Well, I better send another ice comet at Earth...

kdvncm.bsky.social•92 days ago

Engineer: The cup was designed to be twice as large as it needed to be.

brandon-fields.bsky.social•92 days ago

I’m here to see the answer danced by a cat 🐱

dddorq.bsky.social•92 days ago

I’d read that book.

velantianqx.bsky.social•92 days ago

Realist: I have a cup?

brianson.bsky.social•92 days ago

Influencer: Come with me to see something you’ve NEVER seen before. A cup that’s, like, half full or half empty!!!! (Flexes muscles to camera, winks, turns round to show butt cheeks)

nslayton.bsky.social•92 days ago

Russian science fiction writer: The cup is an alien super computer that we cannot grasp and only your deepest regrets can interact with it.

mayhemmayhap.bsky.social•92 days ago

Empty glass: aliens left me here like TRASH

nslayton.bsky.social•92 days ago

Ha I just recorded an episode of @failuretolaunch.bsky.social about STALKER

mayhemmayhap.bsky.social•92 days ago

Oh well then you have a new follower.
Not a stalker, but probably a fan.

nslayton.bsky.social•92 days ago

I'm just a guest on @failuretolaunch.bsky.social but check out the show. Best podcast out there.

mayhemmayhap.bsky.social•92 days ago

Listening now...

mayhemmayhap.bsky.social•92 days ago

High praise, but a competitive field.
FTLpod will definitely play well with Behind the Bastards, Kill James Bond and Well There's Your Problem

faythompsonauthor.bsky.social•92 days ago

if they framed anything as 'should be allowed to' then failing marks on intelligence (humanity) existence is, we and they are part of cosmic expression - we just pick one of those button talking cats, like Russell, to sort out how he wants his servants to continue to feed him...dance...

stephenstroud.bsky.social•92 days ago

Optimist: The cup is half full
Pessimist: The cup is half empty
Me: Bartender, I'll have two cups please.

timinowie.bsky.social•92 days ago

Very Douglas Adams

deborahar.bsky.social•92 days ago

I thought you were a different John Scalzi. Sorry.

chuckles2000.bsky.social•92 days ago

The real one would have had an f-bomb in his writing.

reiditwrite.com•92 days ago

The Ingénieur: Slices cup in half and fills it to the brim.

anthonypooley.bsky.social•92 days ago

Schrödinger: irrespective of the quantity of fluid in the glass, it also may or may not contain a cat. Who can tell...?

troyminos.bsky.social•92 days ago

I'd probably drink the liquid and then wonder why it tasted odd. Later, I would realize I could solve the NY Times crossword puzzle in just a few minutes.

dosemakestoxin.bsky.social•92 days ago

The physicist: "What if it was really half empty?" https://youtu.be/0EytSWiKrFg?feature=shared

michellinator.bsky.social•92 days ago

Me: just drink it, already.

kathleea.bsky.social•92 days ago

Optimist: The cup is half full.
Pessimist: The cup is half empty.
Horror Writer: The cup contains the remains of the undead that feasted on poisonous blood I offered to them at tea time. You’re welcome.

rltjr.bsky.social•92 days ago

Easier to get the cat to tap dance it out. Also, love your books - got hooked with Ild Man’s War and have read/listened to every one since!

jaysanchez.bsky.social•92 days ago

freelancer: what cup?

wallace.solutions•92 days ago

Mystery writer, the cup is poison.

cupitaltea.bsky.social•91 days ago

Optimist: The cup is half full.
Pessimist: The cup is half empty.
Shakespeare: The cup, perchance, doth runneth over—or not.

myarse.bsky.social•89 days ago

In quantum the cup can be full, empty, half full or not even exist. It only becomes when observed, and that's been proven.

blackcatswhitehats.org•30 days ago

…weirdly enough I could handle this. Does the cat dancing need to last 30 minutes and if so can it be sequential cats? The entire cat or just the tail?

(Why am I seeing a short story taking shape…where’s my executive function and keyboard…)

gnarlygeek.bsky.social•92 days ago

IT Helpdesk: If you spill that on your laptop again, you'll have to use this original teal iMac for the next 6 months with no Internet connection.

dc3inthesky.bsky.social•92 days ago

Pragmatist: The cup is half full and half empty. Duh.

kidphantasm.bsky.social•92 days ago

berserkercoach.bsky.social•92 days ago

OOH, I read that one! good stuff

snark66.bsky.social•92 days ago

Fortunately you know of a sentient magnificat who can do such a task.

ronniesmart.bsky.social•92 days ago

Romantic poet, drinking from a human skull: You use cups?

dontaskmyname.bsky.social•92 days ago

Optimist: The cup is half full

Pessimist: The cup is half empty

System Administrator: What in the ever loving FUCK is that cup doing in the server room??

sirosenbaum.bsky.social•92 days ago

I blame Cordwainer Smith for all the dancing cats

mofop.bsky.social•92 days ago

The cup lies empty with nothing to do but be blown away by the dry winds. Perhaps a parent let their child have the meager liquid not knowing when they would see water again. Somewhere the entire Army waited at the border for nothing to happen.

prairiesong.bsky.social•92 days ago

Optimist: The cup is half full

Pessimist: The cup is half empty

Grandma: Let me get you a refill and do you want a cookie with that?

jones-clones.bsky.social•92 days ago

So that sounds like a good start to a new bit of scifi, John. When will we see it?

jameswells98226.bsky.social•92 days ago

Commence negotiations with the cat. Step 1: Getting her to acknowledge your existence.

mrsdianek.bsky.social•92 days ago

Cat knocks cup over.

ddunn1234.bsky.social•92 days ago

Optimist: The cup is half full

Pessimist: The cup is half empty

Nurse: The cup is crawling with bacteria

mreauow.bsky.social•92 days ago

This explains a lot about some of your books.

nopoopforyou.bsky.social•92 days ago

Pouring in or drinking from? Change states.

wonderbink.bsky.social•92 days ago

See, my answer to that cliché is to ask "Well, what were you doing to the glass when you stopped halfway? If you were filling it, it's half-full. If you were emptying it, it's half-empty.

nopoopforyou.bsky.social•92 days ago

Yess! Times arrow matters to how things are measured and how we feel.

humbuckermudgeon.bsky.social•92 days ago

I heard this in my head.

https://youtu.be/Ml4wAnvfM4M?si=MwT1ESSZh86CHxja

mrsdianek.bsky.social•92 days ago

Thank you for this!

pauliebaby.bsky.social•92 days ago

As a teen pessimist , prior to starting my lifelong love affair with antidepressants,
I saw the the cup and wanted to cut my wrists with it.

saribabbles.bsky.social•92 days ago

The cup is exactly as full and as empty as the plot demands.

occasionalprof.bsky.social•92 days ago

Practical optimist: bartender, my glass is half refillable!

aislingceleste.bsky.social•92 days ago

Nope, just reset it all, as there are too many glitches. We must start over.

e-pluribus.bsky.social•92 days ago

grigorylukin.bsky.social•92 days ago

schlep.bsky.social•92 days ago

Optimist: The cup is half full

Pessimist: The cup is half empty

Consultant: I’m pretty sure the cup can be filled to your exact specification. Let me test and get back to you

ronin420.bsky.social•92 days ago

Horror writer: The creature, fast as a blink, snatched her away from the kitchen counter, leaving only the glass of water. It's contents still in motion from being nearly knocked over.

monkeytrick.bsky.social•92 days ago

The mom: Quit whining and drink your milk.

lolagoetz.bsky.social•92 days ago

Realist: the cup is filled to the midpoint

shonaraywrites.bsky.social•92 days ago

Lawyer: it depends.

eleroymason.bsky.social•92 days ago

physicist or chemist - the cup is always mostly empty no matter the level of water, or on Earth or elsewhere

charisserides.bsky.social•92 days ago

Sorry it took so long to reply. The celebration continues, the cat's performance was breathtaking.

ayeeye-mindfuque.bsky.social•92 days ago

Dr. Theopolous: That glass is half-full of a molecular compound that will leave you feeling quite rejuvinated and refreshed, Buck.

HAL 9000: Why are you questioning the contents of the glass, Dave?

AM: I hate you. Now, suffer!