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lynsey-bee.bsky.social
My life mostly involves children, pets, ADHD, ASD, OCD, gardening and stained glass making 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿
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“Children are the world's most valuable resource and its best hope for the future.” - John F. Kennedy

submitted 1 day ago • 34 comments

Somewhere, a Holiday Inn lounge is deathly quiet, save the soft sobbing of the man in the corner, wearing an ill-fitting, threadbare smoking jacket and a toupee that sits slightly askew, running his fingers back and forth through the condensation ring left by his third Manhattan.

submitted 1 day ago • 15 comments

Blooming Sunflowers, by #Ukrainian artist, Boris Eremin 🌻 #UkrainianArt #Art

submitted 1 day ago • 5 comments

submitted 2 days ago • 879 comments

MAGA are mad at Zelenskyy for not wearing a suit for an official White House meeting. Meanwhile:

submitted 3 days ago • 581 comments

Dear Volodymyr Zelenskyy, dear Ukrainian friends, you are not alone.

submitted 3 days ago • 462 comments

submitted 3 days ago • 1956 comments

Your dignity honors the bravery of the Ukrainian people. Be strong, be brave, be fearless. You are never alone, dear President Zelenskyy. We will continue working with you for a just and lasting peace.

submitted 3 days ago • 1726 comments

submitted 3 days ago • 2428 comments

A reminder that it's not a "shouting match" when only one side is doing any shouting.

submitted 3 days ago • 41 comments

GLENN: Why don't you wear a suit? You're at the highest level in this country's office & you refuse to wear a suit. A lot of Americans have problems with you not respecting the office. ZELENSKYY: I will wear a costume after this war will finish. Maybe something like yours. Maybe something better.

submitted 3 days ago • 12046 comments

I hope he sues all of them.

submitted 5 days ago • 25 comments

Telling my cat every single day he’s handsome, so he blossoms into a confident and well adjusted little guy

submitted 8 days ago • 13 comments

My wife said, "I can think of 14 reasons to leave you, plus your obsession with Tennis. I replied, "That's 15 love." -------- Shamelessly stolen from a "Dad Jokes" website.

submitted 8 days ago • 7 comments

"Good morni

submitted 7 days ago • 7 comments

Commas are important. - Shut the fuck up, please. - Shut the fuck up please. Not in this example, but you got the idea.

submitted 7 days ago • 16 comments

Me: “Hi. I’d like a grandé latte with synonym please.” Barista: “You mean, cinnamon, right?” Me: “It’s the same thing, isn't it?”

submitted 8 days ago • 104 comments

if the shoe fits congratulations you’ve found half of your shoes

submitted 7 days ago • 9 comments

Every time I make any kind of pasta I think of this

submitted 7 days ago • 23 comments

submitted 8 days ago • 14 comments

Waiter: How’d you like your steak, sir? Dracula: *loudly* Not thru the heart Lol *whole vampire table erupts in laughter *

submitted 8 days ago • 11 comments

WIFE: what are you watching ME: the sound of music NEIL DEGRASSE TYSON: *crashes through my tv* you don’t watch sound you listen to it

submitted 9 days ago • 8 comments

Friend: Still love dating that guy with multiple personalities? Me: Yeah, he's six in a million

submitted 8 days ago • 3 comments

[calendar naming committee] BOSS: how should we spell the second month GUY WHO SPELLED WEDNESDAY: i have an idea

submitted 8 days ago • 6 comments

A photographer and videographer from Aberystwyth has shared an astonishing video of the world-renowned starling murmurations above Aberystwyth's seafront ✍️ Stephen Price

submitted 8 days ago • 2 comments

People just don't build cities on rock and roll anymore.

submitted 8 days ago • 3 comments

I'm just a wolf who's intentions are good oh lord please don't let me eat Red Riding Hood

submitted 10 days ago • 37 comments

Priest: he was best known for inventing the jack in a box, and now a short musical interlude Pallbearer: *starts winding a tiny handle on the side of the coffin*

submitted 9 days ago • 12 comments

I want a motion sensor on my gravestone that plays the opening to 'Thriller' when people walk past.

submitted 10 days ago • 10 comments

Otterly adorable duo.

submitted 11 days ago • 6 comments

A thread fact checking Trump's claims about Ukraine, which appears to have come directly from the Putin propaganda agency. 1/8

submitted 12 days ago • 7 comments

European Parliament member 👇🏽

submitted 12 days ago • 923 comments

"Alright Claudia, get a legal pad, I want you to take this down. Ready? To whoooooom it may concern..."

submitted 14 days ago • 9 comments

singer: are you ready to rock me: my feet hurt and it's hot in here I can't be expected to rock under these conditions

submitted 14 days ago • 7 comments

i saved the government $8 billion by moving decimals. it’s simple math

submitted 13 days ago • 18 comments

"why'd you leave med school?" [me debating lying or telling them I thought a guy with a bone sticking out his arm got stabbed with a bone]

submitted 19 days ago • 9 comments

“You gotta get me out of here, man.” “Relax, Monty, I’m working on it.” “You talk to my lawyer?” “Yeah, the cops don’t have shit.” “Okay, good. How’s Theresa?” “Fine, her mom’s staying with her.” “Thanks for all this, Frankie.” “Hey, that’s what cousins are for.”

submitted 13 days ago • 11 comments

INVENTOR OF CROUTONS: the roof of my mouth is too damn smooth

submitted 25 days ago • 8 comments

submitted 13 days ago • 27 comments

mupperware: a thread

submitted 21 days ago • 33 comments

Threw him out with the bathwater because nobody wants a tepid baby.

submitted 21 days ago • 5 comments

crazy to think that it’s already the super bowl in australia

submitted 23 days ago • 41 comments

This video will make your day ❤️🐿

submitted 23 days ago • 465 comments

Tesla paid $0 in federal income tax last year. 2022: $0 2021: $0 2020: $0 2019: $0 2018: $0 Tesla reported $6.7 billion in profit in those years.

submitted 23 days ago • 1492 comments

pulled my back so bad that I told my family I might need a wheelchair like Professor X, and my son said “yeah more like Professor XXL” and goddammit I don’t deserve this abuse

submitted 23 days ago • 30 comments

if you didn't understand a question or even if you just didn't hear it, NEVER show weakness by asking someone to repeat themselves. instead say "well that's the million dollar question isn't it"

submitted 23 days ago • 5 comments

If a journalist ever asks you to describe the atmosphere, the correct answer is ‘breathable’.

submitted 23 days ago • 1 comment

As Yoav Gallant has confirmed, the deal that freed today’s hostages has been on the table since May but for political reasons the Israeli government refused it. Every day the hostages spent in confinement since then was the avoidable and tragic result of those calculations.

submitted 23 days ago • 26 comments