xanderrowlet.bsky.social - Profile | ThreadSky | a Reddit-style client for Bluesky

operator: 911, please state your emergency me: uh yeah i want to place a bet on who the next james bond is gonna be operator: yep. ready me: $500 on john smoltz operator: ah, good ol’ smoltzie me: no i said “smoltz” operator: oh i know. that’s just his nickname me: i need to speak to your supervisor

submitted 8 hours ago • 19 comments

submitted 16 days ago • 4 comments

I'm listening to Classic FM at the. moment and the full Mr.Bean theme just came on. Turns out it's called 'Ecce Homo' which is latin for 'Behold the Man' Ecce Homo is also the name of that painting that got fucked up a few years back, which is also very similar to the plot of Mr.Bean the movie.

submitted 20 days ago • 8 comments

No, I’m not perfect. I mix up the definitions of “onus” and “impetus”. Is that so wrong?

submitted 20 days ago • 0 comments

Get Thank Goodness You’re Here and 26 other PC games for just $15

submitted 25 days ago • 2 comments

He is going to say "pinky swear you will protect our border. And buy more booze and stuff from us. " They will say yes. Won't actually buy the stuff. And he will declare victory Trumpenomics

submitted 29 days ago • 2051 comments

When I was a Hill staffer in 2009, a Dem trifecta was trying to pass universal healthcare. In response, Senate GOP released a memo detailing all of the tactics they in the minority could use to delay the effort as much as possible. I'm recirculating that 2009 GOP memo here. Take inspiration from it.

submitted 30 days ago • 1308 comments

My uncle who runs a guitar factory had a shipment of stainless steel go missing and is in quite a panic about it, I tried to console him but maybe I should've worded it better, "don't fret" was a bit insensitive in retrospect

submitted 32 days ago • 31 comments

Cough cough... F around and find out! But Donny is still out here still trying to chop down the programs we pay for and need. We are keeping that pressure ON. Don’t worry, I ain’t letting up.

submitted 34 days ago • 536 comments

I keep having dreams about the GameBoy Advance e-Reader...

submitted 37 days ago • 21 comments

youtu.be/NjWl_RNDMSA

submitted 36 days ago • 0 comments

Fascism is cowardice

submitted 38 days ago • 0 comments

“Terrible things are happening outside. Poor helpless people are being dragged out of their homes. Families are torn apart. Men, women, and children are separated. Children come home from school to find that their parents have disappeared.” Diary of Anne Frank January 13, 1943

submitted 39 days ago • 1359 comments

submitted 40 days ago • 0 comments

it’s going to be so much fun when he dies

submitted 41 days ago • 322 comments

submitted 41 days ago • 0 comments

submitted 41 days ago • 1839 comments

“Be calm when the unthinkable arrives. Modern tyranny is terror management. When the terrorist attack comes, remember that authoritarians exploit such events in order to consolidate power. The sudden disaster that requires the end of checks and balances, the dissolution of opposition parties, the…

submitted 41 days ago • 1 comment

democrats: oh my goodness. can he DO that? democrats: (continue to let him do that) democrats: he just DID that. give us $100

submitted 42 days ago • 30 comments

Somebody told me the plasma rifle from Halo looks like a bird looking at its reflection and it actually pisses me off how right they are.

submitted 43 days ago • 38 comments

submitted 43 days ago • 74 comments

The lost final verse from Pink Floyd's "Mother"

submitted 45 days ago • 1 comment

the "esc" key on a keyboard is a holdover from early-'90s personal computers. on some models it would dispense a can of escargot out of one of the unused drive bays. they put it in the corner so you wouldn't press it by accident because you only got three of them. i pushed it once and got grounded

submitted 53 days ago • 343 comments

unfuckingbelievable. a man buys a cage, spends a year applauding its inhabitants for shitting in it, then complains about the smell

submitted 65 days ago • 19 comments

Die Hard isn't a Christmas movie because of the setting. It's a Christmas movie because it has The Christmas Plot: A man who is neglecting his family to focus on work learns What Really Matters through an improbable crisis around the holidays and rededicates himself to his wife and kids

submitted 67 days ago • 347 comments

submitted 69 days ago • 93 comments

the feds: stop trying to turn this guy into some cool antihero with a badass public image also the feds: treat him like they’ve captured the joker

submitted 75 days ago • 1384 comments

It has been a, uh, difficult week but I have not laughed louder and harder at something in a very long time than at this.

submitted 78 days ago • 246 comments

SIMPLY HAVING A

submitted 80 days ago • 1118 comments

#PokemonTCGpocket Mythical Island! ✨ 🏝️

submitted 82 days ago • 10 comments

I have "Fozzymandias" stuck in my head and have absolutely no idea whatsoever to do with it. "Look upon my works, ye mighty, and wokka wokka"? That's nothing. Infuriating.

submitted 82 days ago • 201 comments

I'm not convinced that the politics of the killer matter more than the politics of the act.

submitted 85 days ago • 123 comments

I kid you not, @itch.io has been taken down by Funko of "Funko Pop" because they use some trash "AI Powered" Brand Protection Software called Brand Shield that created some bogus Phishing report to our registrar, iwantmyname, who ignored our response and just disabled the domain

submitted 85 days ago • 696 comments

➡️ www.rollingstone.com/music/music-...

submitted 85 days ago • 35 comments

The funniest part about the wedding is that our boutique cake we had for photos did not taste as good as the Costco sheet cakes that cost $25 apiece

submitted 86 days ago • 0 comments

If you're more upset with Biden being forced to consider the extraordinary step of peremptorily pardoning his own officials then you are about Trump appointing someone who’s promised to use the federal govt to exact personal retribution for Trump, then you need to think a little more critically.

submitted 88 days ago • 658 comments

Getting married today! c:

submitted 88 days ago • 0 comments

Which way progressives

submitted 88 days ago • 191 comments

submitted 91 days ago • 24 comments

Go play Detroit: Become Human. It’s $12 on Steam right now. Go play the game. Is good and cool. Graphics? Yes. Story? Wow. Controls? Ehhhh. Everything else? Very good!

submitted 90 days ago • 0 comments

I don't like anything a normal amount. If I like something I am all in. 100%.

submitted 92 days ago • 10 comments

A few days out from Thanksgiving, and we still have leftovers to the point where I disdainfully dollop more mashed potatoes onto a paper plate into the microwave. I watch the old potatoes cook, and I look upon my wizened fingers. It will never end. I will be eating leftovers for years.

submitted 93 days ago • 4 comments

Saying "Lincoln was a Republican" is like saying “Kevin Spacey won an Oscar.” Technically it’s true, but a lot of shit has happened since then

submitted 92 days ago • 50 comments

You know who else pardoned his son all of his sins?

submitted 92 days ago • 46 comments

What if I told you that the only reason I am bald is that I’m afraid of a Ratatouille situation? What if I told you that I’d have so much hair if not for the fear of a rat using me like a puppet? These are modes of control, Neo. This is how they manipulate us. Ratatouilles, Neo. Rats that pull hair.

submitted 92 days ago • 107 comments

you come to me on the day of my tummy's hurting

submitted 92 days ago • 2 comments