Beautifully written. Reading this had me in floods of tears. I have looked out for your posts on social media because I get concerned about you, even though we’ve never met, because grief is so difficult and it can be very unpredictable what can knock you sideways when you least expect it.
Yes, it's almost 5 years for me. I did and felt all those things. A fragile protective layer has grown over the wounds but they are still there and I think always will be, ready to break out unexpectedly every so often.
Beautiful and heartbreaking. So much sympathy for your plight. I hope you know how much your podcast contributions are admired and appreciated. A tiny positive amid so much pain, I hope.
That's very kind. I know it sounds ridiculous, but Paper Cuts has been genuinely important to keeping going some times - I'm a freelancer who works from home, it's useful to have a reason to get up and see people sometimes. Also, it's just the loveliest bunch of people
That is beautiful Jonn, and thank you for having the courage to share it. It's good to know that there are some days when you can see a little way ahead. I hope they can outnumber the bad days. And the dog sounds a wonderful companion
Well done for articulating your grief, and by extrapolation the grief of everybody left suddenly, inexplicably, behind
It took me a long time to recover, keep going
Congrats on the book, btw, Agnes would be so proud of you and promoting it madly
He is grand! He doesn't go to many parties these days but he has a new, um, sister? a companion, anyway (who steals all the love he feels he should rightfully receive, but he's mostly quite chipper about it all). xx
Thank you, Jonn. I don’t know you, but your words are beautiful and your pain is clear and understood.
I have no idea how anyone gets through, in your situation.
Jonn, this is so incredibly beautiful, despite the underlying grief and pain that caused it to be written.
Thank you for sharing such a vulnerable and raw part of yourself.
You don’t know me, so this may feel presumptuous, but please, be kind to yourself.
And keep hugging Henry.
Your writing about this fills me with hope and horror. Barring unexpected any me walking under hoisted piano type incidents it’s likely I’ll be in your position in a matter of years. It won’t be a surprise but it’ll still be a shock. Thank you for your raw honesty.
That all seems very, very real. Very closely observed, very clearly stated. Reading between the lines, I think I see you understanding that this is normal grieving. It's good to see that you see healing coming bit by bit, patch by patch of sunlight. May it keep coming.
I only know you through your writing John. I’m in floods of tears - mainly for you and your horrible loss but (and great writing does just this) for the lost people in my life too. Being human means feeling sorrow as much as joy. Thank you for sharing both with me.
That's beautiful Jonn. I really hope writing it helped in some small way. Just try your best to keep going - it may not feel like it, but you've done incredibly this past year - the newsletter is a fantastic read every week and your advocacy on housing is making a real difference
Uff. I sort of wish I hadn’t just read this on a train, but equally grateful despite welling up. I still mourn my family, for the past. Time makes things slightly better & I then I feel guilty for not mourning. Grief’s a strange, evolving beast. Thanks for sharing, it helps and sending you love.
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never stop saying the name. 💔
It took me a long time to recover, keep going
Congrats on the book, btw, Agnes would be so proud of you and promoting it madly
I have no idea how anyone gets through, in your situation.
Thank you for sharing such a vulnerable and raw part of yourself.
You don’t know me, so this may feel presumptuous, but please, be kind to yourself.
And keep hugging Henry.
And, for what it's worth, I am sorry.
Remember to breathe.
Condolences, mate.. 🖤
(472 days in and counting over here.)
Be kind to yourself. 👍
You touched us all with that, may time heal you Jonn.