ME: Used to be there was a thing called 'Pokemon Go.' The world was filled with those funny digital fellas. They're all gone now, like everything else.
MY GEN ALPHA C/O: *checking his rifle breech and kissing the locket of the VTuber he keeps under his flak jacket* We go over the top in five.
MY GEN ALPHA C/O: *checking his rifle breech and kissing the locket of the VTuber he keeps under his flak jacket* We go over the top in five.
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My squad in unison: BE KIND AND REWIND
My Gen Alpha Sgt in the officers voice discord: The elder millennial is being sussy baka about "libraries" again. I don't think he's stable for the raid on Mr.Beast's Tower
oh no
oh nononono
a speculative fiction is coming my way
Me: Just like Soulja Boy
Gen Alpha Canonner: You keep saying that and I don't know what it means. Why did you write "Dougie" on all the shells?
Me: Someone's gotta teach 'em.
thank god it isn't or i'd never get any coins
They/Them: “So how did you do it?”
Me: “I gutted him with my trench knife.”
*Flicks zippo, hits penjamin*
MP: check his locket
Intel Officer: it's Mori Calliope. Arrest him
I can’t remember my own phone number after 3pm but when that nice kid taps me on the shoulder and says ‘it’s time’ I’ll open up on anything that wanders into my field of fire
Gen Alpha CO: I will, old timer. I will.
He looks me dead in the eyes and simply says, "Skibidi".
"what's 'five big booms' again?" whispers our new twenty-ish Robloxist partisan, toggling xir safety icon off.
"this is no Costco, Kai. ask your mother." click. CRACK.
Gen beta grunt, loading mags after being done with the daily slop: ok boomer