As a redhead for whom the phoenix has been a deeply beloved and prevalent symbol, I am with you.
Side note: I've designed a multitude of tattoos for others yet have none myself & am seriously considering my first, and the phoenix sits at the top of the list.
I’ll never forget the sinking feeling I had that night, or the disgust I felt in my fellow Americans. It was like a mask was removed and I could see how ugly and hateful so many Americans are.
I lost faith in humanity, watched (now ex) friends and fam transform into hateful, deranged ppl. maybe they only revealed who they really were all along, but when a guy pal (not even American ffs) was thrilled and told me I needed to have 2 kids to further the white race I decided to never have any
I kept thinking this was a mistake that could be corrected. Somebody's going to fix this, right? And watching my male friends show their asses, saying stupid shit like "I just feel better about the economy when the prez is R" that my fears about my bodily autonomy being taken away were hyperbole
And then their wives lining up behind and deferring to their cargo short-wearing dipshit broseph husbands because politics is for the men or whatever the fuck. I cut them all out and I know I'm better off for it but it's still so shocking that it happened in the first place.
My oldest kid can’t even talk about it right now because watching Trump win was a pivotal moment in her development. And we’re fucking Canadian. But she just knew he was a person who shouldn’t win anything.
I cried and despaired that night. I sought out other moms at school drop off the next day and cried again. Then we all protested in pink hats and organized. Feeling that same motivation again
I didn’t either. Like others have said, the sound of his voice is still a profound trigger. There are things leading up, over decades, at my age, that will remain unforgivable. I wished the applause last night had lasted an hour. But it was healing with tremendous sorrow for was would never be.
I know that this is something other folks have felt for a long time, but before 2016, I never felt like 1/3 of the population was trying to kill me. Now, that's what I think about when meeting anyone new.
I remember the next few weeks - any time I went somewhere and saw two men in line for anything, I knew (statistically speaking) they voted for that motherfucker.
I couldn’t go to work the next day. And when I finally did all these shit male Mormon lawyers said it won’t be so bad. Fuck them. All they cared about was their fucking tax breaks.
But your compassion/ability to empathize with those who most stood to hurt matters & is seen & appreciated. It counts. As a white woman, I listened to my Black, brown & Indigenous sisters & rage with them. As a queer person, I live with fear. But as an armybrat I know the power of an ally in battle.
My daughter was born that year, and I was excited that a woman president would be the norm for her. And then it wasn’t and in the most horrible way. Gutting.
I spiraled straight into depression that night and I don’t think I really started coming out of that until late 2020
There was a reason so many people came out for Women’s Marches in January (and near-weekly protests for the next four years running.) Just continuous simmering rage the whole time.
I was already in pretty bad depression, so that night put me down the drain. It didn’t feel worth pulling myself out until 2020. You have to have hope to do that.
When Trump's win by the electoral college was final, I was pale as a ghost for the next day or so. Had a really hard time keeping it together in class after that. I knew bad presidents get people killed. I called way too many shots since. I hope to God my transgender ass never has to hear him again.
As a sexual assault survivor i was devastated when he won, esp when most of my family and plenty of friends (!) were thrilled. I quit FB and all news (was a religious NPR listener) My Mom was a Bernie to Trumper and is destroyed our relationship until she died. So yeah…traumatic.
I was the second drunkest I’ve ever been that night and I stayed to comfort the hostess and fix breakfast the next morning, the hangover was nothing compared to the shell shock
Comments
the lead-up to that election is what pushed me to start binding full time
"Out of the ash
I rise with my red hair
And I eat men like air."
Side note: I've designed a multitude of tattoos for others yet have none myself & am seriously considering my first, and the phoenix sits at the top of the list.
We have joy, and compassion for the vulnerable, on our side. Those are not the same as softness.
Because she lives alone
And no woman should have been alone that night
There was a reason so many people came out for Women’s Marches in January (and near-weekly protests for the next four years running.) Just continuous simmering rage the whole time.