I was a 70s kid, and it is amazing to recall what a steady diet of heart-wrenching tragedy was passed off as children's literature back then. Charlotte's Web, Bridge to Terabithia, Old Yeller, Where the Red Fern Grows, Flowers for Algernon, etc etc. Afterschool specials were like Trauma of the Week.
(And at the same time we were reading all this grief lit, we had to worry about stuff like quicksand and spontaneous combustion. Life really was a big book of bummers, as Dynamite magazine sagely reminded us.)
I'd probably trade that one in. Porkability is a big part of "being suitable for hamming". And you learned or bought it in script! You poor abused thing. I'm sure the dowry was shit anyway.
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Roses are red
Violets are blue
Musk's in the Oval Office
FML
You can have that one for free.