Absolutely. I have “tidied” a lot since my beloved husband died. I have laid the Persian carpets all over the house. What on earth was he saving them for????
I own a 100 year old 1st edition copy of a music book called The American Songbag. I scribble notes and annotations in it and it's well worn from traveling around in my backpack. It's a treasure, and it exists to be USED. 🎶
I'm reminded of a story of a couple who put a plastic cover on the sofa they received as a wedding present. The only occasion special enough to remove it was her wake.
game developers must cringe at their playerbase hoarding potions and scrolls and never using them, it must make the loot system feel like a pointless endeavor
Tunic developed a unique solution to this: Dying or teleporting to a save point refilled consumable quantities, and each consumable "levelled up" becoming more powerful through usage. This made players feel guilty for *not* using consumables before death as they'd missed valuable item experience.
The amount of stuff I have in random Stardew Valley chests that fills me with joy just to have it...
There are people playing that game with the sole goal of creating & filling whole buildings dedicated to sorted materials - one chest for each item - all with signage.
Seeing my elderly neighbours, who've been here for decades, die off..... and shortly after there's a skip bin in the driveway of their house filled with the former contents....that's kinda sobering.
I wonder if part of the reason some folks do this is the hope "these things could be worth money some day", knowing that is lokely the only way they could experience wealth the way the economy is set up.
My grandmother hoarded Beanie Babies when they first came out.
"These will sell for millions some day."
They stayed in their boxes and packed up in trash bags, through 3 moves. Got peed on and chewed by mice, and ruined by mold. My parents threw them away after holding onto them for like 20 years.
As a retro game collector I’m torn on this. There is a part of me that wants to preserve things for the future but part of me just wants to enjoy what I have. I compromise and leave a few items alone like some of my sealed ps1 games
For billions of years since the outset of time
Every single one of your ancestors survived
Every single person on your mum and dad's side
Successfully looked after and passed onto you life
What are the chances of that, like?
I know it's a small thing, but this glass (not THIS exact one, but you get me) is the last one I have that was used on TNG. The rest are broken, and this one inevitably will be, too. Maybe today, or in 1,000 years. I don't hide it. I use it. I'm literally using it right now, and it makes me happy.
When we went through my Dad's house after he passed, we found boxed glasses in the cupboard that he and mom received for their wedding. Along with fancy dishes, etc. Never opened. So much stuff, never used. All donated: hope someone's using it now :)
Yep. Drink the expensive wine tonight, don’t wait for some unspecified momentous event because it might not happen and if it does it’ll be just as special without the wine.
Very much same. I’ve been ruminating for a while about that phrase, “to be loved is to be changed” and this helped me process how to better think about it positively.
My parents ALWAYS used the fancy Wedgewood china that's rare, expensive, and near impossible to replace. For EVERY meal. My mother was a fond proponent of not saving things for 'special occasions,' because being around to use them is a special occasion.
I had no idea it was 'special' until I got older. It was just... the dishes we ate on. PB&J cut into a Union Jack at the age of 5? On Wedgewood. Pancake breakfast at age 11? Wedgewood. Until I got older, I didn't really understand why we didn't have 'fine, never-used China' like other families...
My GreatGrandmother made a quilt for my Mom's first child before Greatgrandma died (Mom had no children yet). She made my Mom promise it would be used, not put away. I loved that quilt and used it until it fell apart. It wouldn't mean nearly as much if it had been "put away" for me.
That's lovely! As a quilter, thank you. My most treasured photos of the quilts I make are the blurry ones with happy children on them. It'd break my heart if they were put away rather than used.
Thank you. After my Grandmother died last year, we found two quilt tops that Greatgrandma never got to finish. Still figuring out to get them finished. Sewing projects still waiting to be finished 50 some years later 🙃
If you don't quilt yourself, you may find help with the Loose Ends project. They connect volunteer crafters and artists with people who want to get their loved ones' projects finished.
You could hire a longarm quilter to finish them! I think all you need to do is press the quilt top (don't wash it) and they can provide the rest of the materials. You'd need one who'd be able to do the binding as well.
I finished a quilt my friend's late mother had made them, and it was an honour.
I love kintsugi for this reason. Objects have meaning because we live with them, use them so that they have the power to remind us our past. The wear and tear is part of objects beauty.
I think this is why I love used books so much.
I love buying the ones rated as being very worn, because that means that the book has been made *special*. I love to see "this book belongs to ____" written inside the cover, and annotations in the margins, and scribbles and doodles, and criticisms.
As a poor teen I was given a box of hedgehog-shaped chocolate hazelnut truffles and they were so good that I rationed them for probably the better part of a year, because I literally didn't believe there was any way I would ever be able to have something that good again! 🥲
Was the last as good as the first or had the chocolate bloomed and the caramel crystallized?
Rationing is a discipline, but it can go too far. My grandparents died before opening the good wine.
My inlaws had lovely new dining room furniture, never used for holidays and family dinners. Table sat covered with books and papers for 10 years . Finally used ONCE for a catered dinner after my MIL was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. She couldn’t even enjoy the meal! Don’t wait!
She still has these cute glass spice bottles (a few of them still with some spices inside, with most of the OG labels....) that belonged to her grandmother.
She REFUSES to let me clean them out and re-use them! Its been over 20 years, let them go :')
Yes! My standard for “things requiring extreme care” is “seriously, now, do you think this might be in a museum in 500 years?” and if not then just use the thing. I’m generally a careful person so I still get plenty of wear out of stuff.
I make quilts for my friends. By hand, because I don't know how to use a sewing machine. I get really caught up designing them, so they are beautiful, good enough to exhibit.
I tell them firmly that baby quilts are to be dragged around, vomited on, given a good life, and here's how to wash them.
Over the course of a brutal time of severe illness and housing insecurity I've lost a lot of beloved possessions. I've never thought of any of those things and wished I'd used them less.
Yes! My wife had a similar fear of using the "good" item, until I showed her this clip of monks making, then destroying, a sand mandala.
It completely rewrote the script in her head.
Comments
"Nice boots, mate."
Use the nice things (and look after them 🙂)
The amount of stuff I have in random Stardew Valley chests that fills me with joy just to have it...
There are people playing that game with the sole goal of creating & filling whole buildings dedicated to sorted materials - one chest for each item - all with signage.
I’m thinking more RPGs where you fight a final boss with x99 potions in your inventory you never used because you didn’t want to run out in the future
"These will sell for millions some day."
They stayed in their boxes and packed up in trash bags, through 3 moves. Got peed on and chewed by mice, and ruined by mold. My parents threw them away after holding onto them for like 20 years.
Right in the heart
Every single one of your ancestors survived
Every single person on your mum and dad's side
Successfully looked after and passed onto you life
What are the chances of that, like?
https://youtu.be/yc9gIzRhrvY?si=QoxFYL1eTzczqKE0
I have one life I’m listening to that mint condition White Album.
https://looseends.org/
I finished a quilt my friend's late mother had made them, and it was an honour.
I love buying the ones rated as being very worn, because that means that the book has been made *special*. I love to see "this book belongs to ____" written inside the cover, and annotations in the margins, and scribbles and doodles, and criticisms.
I draw, underline, write notes, think on the paper, sometimes paint in a book.
https://youtu.be/ClAqiBqqtu0?si=1w4lhCa2njueKAIS
Fuck no I'm eating MY candy and if I don't have any tomorrow, well I had a bunch yesterday and had a blast.
Rationing is a discipline, but it can go too far. My grandparents died before opening the good wine.
https://bsky.app/profile/sirin.bsky.social/post/3kik6htphmh27
She still has these cute glass spice bottles (a few of them still with some spices inside, with most of the OG labels....) that belonged to her grandmother.
She REFUSES to let me clean them out and re-use them! Its been over 20 years, let them go :')
I tell them firmly that baby quilts are to be dragged around, vomited on, given a good life, and here's how to wash them.
It completely rewrote the script in her head.