I am looking for someone to help me marketing my 1st book. Its a great book about how we can all get through this difficult time. I am a 1st time author.
I thought “junlper got a job at the onion” was one of those major events in bluesky history. Like the Crossing of the Delaware or GWB’s Mission Accomplished speech.
this proves nothing! we must see you with the CEO, Mister Onion himself while he is signing your paycheck. Please do not obscure the routing number on the check
you're like a reverse jenny. she puts that she's a backend developer and everyone believes it, you say that you work for the onion and nobody thinks it's real 😭
Are you finding it difficult to write satire in this environment where reality is even crazier than satire? I've been feeling sorry for you folks at The Onion for a long time. The competition you're getting from reality has to be intense. 😱
If I only could,
I’d make a deal with God.
Individual onions for ten bucks.
He’d say “That’s not very good.”
I’d say “Yeah, but you’re God!
Isn’t money kind of beneath you?”
He’d say “It’s the principle!”
And I’d say “DO YOU WANT AN ONION OR NOT?”
i’m not a writer, i’m just the social media editor! you must give credit to the brilliantly funny writers and editors who lived through the G/O media days and have always done great work, just under an insanely repressive ownership
Comments
(I was in an Onion produced commercial for Schick several years ago and we shot it at the office. THE BREAKROOM SEEMED NICE.)
And fail. I'd probably need about 20 times my wit.
When did you quit working at The Beer?
Local Christian man baffled at congregation caring about immigrants and the poor.
How do you and your co-workers at The Onion stay ahead of reality?
Where do I send my 30 headlines?
I’d make a deal with God.
Individual onions for ten bucks.
He’d say “That’s not very good.”
I’d say “Yeah, but you’re God!
Isn’t money kind of beneath you?”
He’d say “It’s the principle!”
And I’d say “DO YOU WANT AN ONION OR NOT?”
All the women who like helping rapists for billionaires are
This hasn't been wrong yet
im probably the only person who isnt totally european in this fuckin thread
all privileged white xenophobic sexist power obsessed monsters, and they pretend they are progressive heros.
it would so prove i'm telling the truth
Neither of you know me personally, but I wanted to say it.
Hi.
To be fair, you're still part of the only press I've ever trusted.